Sewing Destiny
by JustAnotherFallen
Summary: Sequel to Aim for the Heart. Takes place during season 2. With everything changing around her, the camp, her love, her loyalties, what path will Siobhan choose? Now Complete.
1. A New Beginning

**Disclaimer: I own my own characters. I am not affiliated with the producers of Robin Hood or any part of BBC for that matter. Hells bells, I'm from the US.**

* * *

"Hand!"  
Allan pulled me up by my wrists onto the branch. "Well?"  
"Wagon coming, we've got some time. Where's Robin?"  
"Down here. Are we all set yet?"  
I smiled over the branch where Robin was standing at the trunk. He had mud and gum packed around his eye with a cut off arrow sticking out. "Well I'd lie down in the ground if I were you. Not many people walk around calmly with an arrow in the eye."  
He laughed and fell into the ground letting Much and Djaq hurriedly kick dirt and leaves over him.  
I turned my head over my shoulder to look at Allan. "You should probably get a move on you know."  
He gave a chuckled peaking over my shoulder. "Looks like show time." He gave a sigh running fingers through his hair. Catching my stare he grinned. "I need a hair cut."  
I turned my face toward his with a smile. "I don't know. I rather like it."  
His grin widened. "Then I guess I'll have to keep it this way." He gave me a wink and made his way down the tree. "Head back to camp. That way you can see how well this door of Will's works."  
I shimmed to the other side of the tree wrapping a loose cloth around the hidden rope. One a few of the trees we had tied ropes close to the top for an easier way up and down. Allan was just being a show off climbing down as he had before because this way was much faster. I pressed my feet against the trunk and repelled down enjoying the wind in my hair. As I made it to the bottom, I turned and ran into a chest. "Ow, watch it."  
Will pinched my nose and gave me a smile. "I'm not the one walking into people. Think you should start heading to the camp?"  
I grinned up at Will. Like Allan and the others his hair was growing a touch shaggy. I never thought a day would come when I would truly enjoy the shagginess of men. Even Robin carried his new style well.  
I think on everyone I liked Djaq's new look the most. I had persuaded her to allow me to make her real clothes since the Sheriff and his men already knew her to be a woman. It was a nice improvement and I had more fun mending her clothes. Like the others her hair was growing out. Except on her it was growing back in a lovely shade of black I envied.  
But currently it was Will smiling down at me. I gave a sigh and walked past him without a word, but a hundred thoughts. Things with Will had been very different. He was relaxed and laughing for the first time since Robin had left. Of course there was still something off. It might have also been because of how things were when he came back. I had been very hard on both him and Allan once things were settled. Neither would look me in the eye for the longest time and the others were enjoying that so much no one had the heart to yell at them for leaving in the first place. Robin had thanked me for doing his job, which made me turn the glare on him as well. Will had gone back to treating me like he used to a while back; like a sister. That was not my favorite thing in the world, but it was something. He wasn't acting depressed, or angry so for that I could be thankful.  
That was my attitude in these months, be thankful. Be thankful everyone was alive and happy. So I just walked quickly back to camp. Another thing to be happy about. A permanent camp. I didn't have to constantly change my routes to find them, or worry about one of their other camps being found. The camp was also bigger than my cottage, which was amazing. Some nights I would just go over there to cook to get away.  
Getting away was another little pleasantry. Unlike before when Tobias had come round looking to woo me, he was avoiding me as well. Of course it could be mainly because Gisborne was more than just a bit miffed at Marian ever since the whole leaving him at the alter incident. As Guy's lackey it would look bad if he was still fraternizing with the enemy. Although, it didn't stop him from staring-leering actually-every time I was in the market. Djaq offered to make up a fun little potion, but I declined. If this was the worst of my problems I think I could deal with it on my own.  
And Marian had been thrown out of Gisborne's light. Completely I should add. This wasn't exactly as good as we had originally thought it to be. Gisborne was a major obstacle we were having troubles with. He had been worse than usual after Marian left.  
I looked behind me seeing Robin and the others slide down into the leaves. I rolled into the entrance of the camp and Will pulled the lever bringing down the door of the entrance.  
All of us were staring up through the mesh and leaves that covered the roof of the camp. Voices could be heard above us, the woman loudest of all. She was calling her guards to come back. They were headed to Nottingham, that much I could hear from the grumbling.  
Their hoofbeats were disappearing as the laughing started.  
Will pulled the lever to bring the door to the entrance back up.  
"Come on." Robin smiled stepping outside. "Great work Will."  
Will shrugged, but the smile on his face was obvious. "It was nothing."  
Much looked shocked, but laughed. "Nothing? It's genius! I love our camp!"  
I rolled my eyes. "So I suppose a celebration is in order."  
Djaq smiled following me to the back of the camp. "Food sounds good about now." She handed me a small bag, smiling. "I have a surprise for you."  
I lifted a brow peering in to the bag. Smelling the contents I gave her a hug. "Thyme! Oh Djaq, it's wonderful. Where did you find it? I have not seen it growing around here in years. I used to have to go outside the county to get it." I turned to the others dangling the bag. "We're in for a treat."  
Allan peaked over my shoulder grabbing a pinch of the thyme. "I don't care what you're making. I just want your cooking. You've left us to the mercy of Much's cooking for too long."  
I rolled my eye smacking him in the chest. "It's not that bad. I think I spoil you all sometimes."  
He grinned kissing my temple. "And that is why we love and appreciate you so much. So about that food..."

* * *

"Oh hells." I tossed the soup spoon to Much, quickly grabbing my bag.  
Robin raised an eyebrow at my movements. "And where are we off to in such a rush?"  
"Marian. The, uh, Night Watchman was doing a run tonight. I was supposed to pick up more torn clothes. And I need to drop off new medicine for Edward."  
Robin nodded slinging his bow across his shoulders, letting his wrists hang loosely over the ends. "I'll come with you. I haven't seen her in a few days."  
I rolled my eyes. "You are a horrid liar." I froze fixing my shoulder strap as night sky lit up. "Why do I suddenly have a bad feeling?"  
Much looked out the entrance toward the sky. "Paranoia?"  
Allan gripped one of the ceiling planks leaning forward. "I don't know. Heat lightening is unusual for this time of year. Plus it's been a bad sign is my experience."  
Will rolled his eyes. "Cousin struck by lightening? The same one who turned into a newt?"  
Allan glared. "Firstly he saw someone turned into a frog. Secondly, heat lightening doesn't touch ground so it can't strike you."  
Robin hit the backs of my knees with his bow, making me fall into Will. "Let's go before they attempt to try you as a witch again."  
Will gave my forehead a kiss goodbye, and I stuck my tongue out at him.  
I moved to Allan giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you for being on my side for once."  
He laughed. "Sometimes I'm one of the good guys. So what else can I do to earn a kiss?"  
Robin looped his arm through mine, tugging me along. "All right, we get the point. No making fun of you."

* * *

I pulled myself through Marian's window and she jumped. "It's all nice and fine with the two of you flirting, but literally leaving me hanging isn't as fun."  
Robin gave me a hand rolling his eyes. "You don't have to be as dramatic as coming up through the window."  
I crossed my arms. "I do when I see Gisborne riding this way with torches."  
Marian's eyes widened and we all froze listening to the horses and screaming.  
Marian held Robin back as I looked out the window checking to make sure the brush was clear. I let Robin go out first watching Marian run down the stairs.  
I grabbed the clothing from her trunk. I got a hold of anything I could as I smelt the smoke from downstairs. Gisborne was burning the house. An arrow shot through the window, Robin's signal to hurry.  
I went to the window holding up a finger. Robin wasn't looking up. Even in the light of the fire, I could see his jaw was clenched. Apparently, Marian had given him clue to stand down. Good.  
I started coughing realizing I didn't have much time. Grabbing a small trunk I broke the bars on the window tossing down a trunk full of clothing. I refused to let all her clothing burn. I had put work into most of it, and I wouldn't let Gisborne embarrass Marian by making her wear the lowest of clothing. Taking a survey of the room I was halfway through the window when I found her jewelry box. I stuffed it in my bag just as the fire moved up the stairs.  
"Siobhan!"  
I ran to the window climbing down the sides of the house as quickly as I could. I could still remember sneaking out of Marian's room years ago. It hurt knowing this would be the last time I would ever be able to do it.  
Robin grabbed me from behind hurrying away from the burning house. "What. Were. You. THINKING?"  
Uh oh. I hadn't seen Robin this angry with me in a while. But I knew it wasn't just me. It was more transference. He couldn't rightly go after Gisborne, and he hated not being able to rescue Marian right away.  
I held out the jewelry box from my bag. "This is all Marian has left of her mother. I'm not letting all her memories burn away."  
I saw Robin count to ten. "And the trunk?"  
I grinned. "Well after all the work I've put into those dresses, the least I could do was save my creations."  
"Siobhan, I've known you for my entire life and honestly that is the vainest thing I have ever heard you say." He shook his head with a smile, but sobered quickly. "Now, go back to your cottage. I grabbed Marian's horse before she ran too far off."  
I nodded. "Before you go to town tomorrow, stop by. I've got the mending. Plus, I'll need to see Marian. I'd rather have a bit of nice company before I have to go into the castle."  
He nodded. "It'll just be Much, Allan, and myself. We're not storming the castle, but we need to figure what we can about the rings."

* * *

Robin and I held back silent laughter as Much and Allan argued.  
"Jigger off? What does that even mean?"  
Robin shook his head sliding an arm around my shoulders. "Just watch Allan before you go into the castle. Make sure he doesn't get into too much trouble."  
"No promises." I laughed taking after Allan. I ran a bit faster grabbing Allan's strap. "Well hell, you can slow up a bit."  
He rolled his eyes then smiled. "Would you like to help a bit?"  
"Depends...how much do I lose?"  
He shook his head. "Nothing, you'll be my demonstration that the game isn't rigged."  
"But it is."  
"Yes, but the drunkards inside don't know that. Just pick the middle cup, I'll make sure you get it. Wait a minute out here then come in." He gave me one of his wonderful smiles and swept inside.  
I refolded a few garments inside my basket before heading inside. I watched Allan work the crowd trying to get someone to double their wages. I listened with a few others before sitting opposite of him laying down three coins. "All right. I'll play your game."  
Allan smiled. "Luck must be smiling on me to grant me such a beautiful first better."  
I couldn't hold back the smile. "All right, I just have to find the coin under the cup?"  
He nodded. Placing one of my coins beneath a cup he shuffled the cups around all the time keeping his eyes on me.  
Something about his gaze sent chills through my body. It wasn't worried chills, it was the same type of chills I got whenever I caught Allan's eyes. Every time he got that look it reminded me that playing with Allan wasn't always very smart. He had feelings for me still and nothing I said or did could stop that. If I wanted to be honest I wasn't sure I wanted him to stop.  
It was true, a terrible truth I'd tried to ignore. Even though Will's feelings for me fluctuated, I never really wanted to give up on him. Yet, it didn't stop me from developing feelings for Allan. Which was not one of my smartest moves, but what ever was? The only upside was that there was sure to be positive attention coming from one of them. It scared me sometimes knowing that was what I felt. The need to be wanted.  
As he stopped moving the cups I placed two fingers on the middle cup.  
Allan smiled turning the cup up revealing the coin. "Beautiful and intelligent, I am the lucky one." He placed my winnings in my hand. "Do come again any time my lady."  
I smiled gathering my items as someone new sat down. I knelt to grab my basket and slipped the winnings back in Allan's hand. He frowned during his shuffling, but I just smiled keeping my voice low. "Just incase you trick the wrong drunk soldier. Keep enough to get you out of jail."  
I straightened and headed outside. Now it was time to go to the castle.

* * *

I wanted to scream. I'd been locked in a room for over an hour, watching the events in the square unfold below. Robin had been captured, Marian was under house arrested and I hadn't figured a way out yet.  
The door behind me opened and I went to grab my knife. If they even thought about taking me to the dungeons all bets were off. I wasn't even sure myself why I'd been locked up. Probably Gisborne's doing. If I had thought he hated me before things had only gotten worse since the whole botched wedding.  
Tobias walked through the door and I considered just pulling my knife out anyway.  
He smiled making a bow toward the door. "You're free to go."  
"Well, I would like to know why I was locked up against my will. I have not been told anything. I happen to be running very low on patience."  
Tobias frowned. "If you would like I can just lock up back up so you can ask for the Sheriff.'  
I shook my head grabbing my basket to walk past him.  
His hand shot out grabbing my elbow. "Things would be so much easier if you would simply just accept how much I could help you."  
"Submission only comes to those that are weak. I have never been weak."  
A gloved hand met my neck thumb pressing against my windpipe. "I could show you the benefits of submission."  
My knife slide into my hand pressing into the cloth in front of his stomach. "This will be lodged into your stomach before you ever hurt me."  
His eyes widened as the ripping of fabric could be heard.  
We both turned out heard to the widow as shouting could be heard. "NIGHT WATCHMAN!"  
It warmed my heart just a bit to hear the Sheriff so close to losing his mind.  
I withdrew my knife. "I should think you are needed elsewhere. I will just take my leave." I nodded and hurried down the back staircase.  
With any luck I would get down there the same time she made her disappearance. Apparently my timing was better than I thought.  
Marian bowled me over struggling to get up until she saw it was me.  
She rolled to her side pulling her mask off and started sobbing. "It's Robin. He's dead."  
I pulled a dress from the drying line cradling Marian in my arms.  
Rocking back and forth I shook my head. Robin couldn't be dead. This was Robin. Our Robin. The one who had been joking with me only a while ago.

* * *

I watched as Marian rake her fingers through her hair, shaking her head again. I knew how she felt. Her whole world was moving in slow motion and there was nothing she could do to stop it.  
She started to trip and I ran to get her, but the sheet before her moved. Robin grabbed the falling Marian. A god thing he did because when she saw him her knees gave out. "Robin!"  
I laughed walking over to them. Oh all the weight off my shoulders. "You know there's no need to make her trip. She's already fallen in love with you."  
Robin wrapped an arm around Marian's waist motioning us to follow him.  
Thus started the fight they always seem to have. The fight on whether or not Marian should be in the castle and act as a spy.  
I waited behind a door, biting my lip feeling as if I was intruding.  
As Marian ran back to the castle Robin turned back to me. "I love her."  
"I know."  
"But sometimes I really hate that she doesn't always need me."  
"Five years without you by her side made her self sufficient. Plus, be fair Robin. She always did stand up for herself."  
"But I don't like her putting herself in this much danger. It's one thing when she does her Night Watchman bit. It is another thing entirely when she wants to stay in the castle where she knows she's as welcome as the plague."  
"What do you want me to do?"  
"I didn't ask you to do anything."  
I held a hand up. "Robin, if there's anything I know it's that you hate asking for help. Yet, I can see it plainly on your face. Just tell me what you want me to do so you feel better about Marian in the castle."  
"Check up on her whenever you get the chance."  
"I'll do the best I can on that front."  
He paused looking at my face. "Best you can? That's a honest answer."  
"Yes well, I'm only a little more welcome than Marian. Thats just because I deliver clothes. You forget. Gisborne hates m more than he previously did and Tobias is following suit."  
"Ah, and how is your friend Tobias?"  
"Tried to break my arm."  
Robin stopped walking. "And?"  
"I considered slicing his throat, but the Night Watchman's distraction saved his life."  
"Siobhan...you have to hold your temper."  
"Robin, I've held my temper for longer than I ever have." I gave a sigh, hitching my basket up higher. "I don't like letting people physically hurt me and walk away unharmed. It's against my morals and teaching. If you keep letting someone hurt you, you need to stay away from them or put enough fear in them not to hurt you back."  
Robin gave my cheek a kiss and turned to hurry into market. "Come to camp later. And by the by, maybe you should listen to your own advice."  
I cocked my head to the side watching him go. "What the..." What he said dawned on me and I winced. "Oh hell, I set myself up for that one."

* * *

I folded my knees up to my chest watching the others. It was like a tale, Robin rallying everyone, reminding them to never give up even if he should die. There was a sobering thought should we ever need them. Too many times in the past two years I'd believed Robin to be dead.  
"Listen to me. We are not just six outlaws here in the forest." His eyes glanced to me. "We are the people of the town as well. We are more than six. Look at Marian, Siobhan, Roger of Stoke. Everyone who has ever helped up. They are Robin Hood. We are the spirit of England! And that lads, that is this county's only hope."  
Allan came forward, large bruise under his right eye. "Hi lads."  
I leapt up touching the side of his face as Djaq said what I was thinking. "What happened to you?"  
"Trick after a pint too many." He smiled slowly moving my hand from his face, giving me a wink.  
"Oh I could have told you that." Much handed Allan a mug of ale. "We are Robin Hood."  
"What?"  
"Just say it."  
Will handed me my own mug, standing on my other side. He knocked my mug with his as we all raised our drinks in a toast.  
"We are Robin Hood."

* * *

**A/N:  
Well I did say I would be back with a sequel. I know I'm a bit late. I mean I've seen all of season 2 and it's already started airing in the states, BUT there is good news.  
I've officially finished school and we all know what that means.  
Well...those who have been long fans and know my summer routine know.  
It means more updates because I don't have hours of school work, project, college forms, or other fun things to distract me.  
I apologize ahead of time for any format errors, but I got so excited I just had to upload this straight away. More entertaining things to come, not a lot could be done with the first epi besides a brief catch up. I'll try to keep updates to co-inside with those in the states who watch Robin Hood so i don't accidentally spoil anything. However, if I do go on a roll or go away for a weekend and decide to upload early I'll be sure to add a spoiler warning so you don't read by mistake.  
For any UK friends I apologize if this goes slow since you've already seen it, btu come on. It means you can relive the agony of waiting week by week for season 2.  
Okay enough from me.  
Happy reading.**


	2. A Gamble on Life

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor am I affiliated with Robin Hood in anyway. I merely own my own characters. So that's not bloody much.**

* * *

I grinned. "We get to play the money game?"  
Robin laughed nodding. "Yes, we're playing the money game. In teams, by yourselves, anyway you want. But we want to break our last record."  
John scratched his head. "Who won last time?"  
Allan smiled. "That would be me."  
Will laughed. "Yeah by one pound. Although I give you a lot of credit for that one."  
Much crossed his arms. "That was cheating."  
Allan had a mock look of hurt on his face. "Cheating? I never cheat."  
Djaq rolled her eyes. "You tripped Much for his money pouch."  
Allan grinned. "Well, it was all going to the same place right?"  
Robin shook his head. "Right, so first round I'm pairing you off. Then you can pair off for round two, then do whatever you want. Will with John. Djaq with Much. Allan with Siobhan."  
I crossed my arms. "Oh you're too good to pair up?"  
He laughed. "I have a few errands, so I'm working by myself. You cannot forget I was not allowed to win last year."  
"We had to give you a time limit. You're more competitive than Allan!"  
Allan touched his chest staring at me. "You are supposed to be on my side. We're a team."  
"Well, let's hurry up then."

* * *

Allan touched my arm. "You ready?"  
I smiled. "Always."  
We began an animated conversation about a quite lake I go to a lot on nice days and Allan's childhood. Something simple as we finally found our target.  
He was a traveling oil salesman. Ripped off people. He would water down the bits of oil, and sell it at high prices. He was also a complete lecher.  
I rolled my shoulders swaying as I moved closer, letting Allan fall behind me. Putting a hand dramatically to my head I let go of my body falling into the oil man and landing on the ground.  
My eyes were shut, but I could hear him curse and carefully kneel to check on me.  
He grabbed me by my shoulders. "Feeling faint? Perhaps if we loosen this shirt-"  
"My wife!"  
I let my eyes open as Allan appeared giving me a wink before rushing to my side pulling me away from the oil man. "Darling, are you all right?"  
I touched a hand to my temple. "Just a bit light headed. Do you have my satchel?"  
He nodded, sliding my satchel over his head so it rested at his side. "Are you sure you're fine?"  
Back at the word wife the oil man had jumped away. Probably scared. There were rumors he was run out of the last town for getting too friendly with the wife of the sheriff.  
He quickly composed himself. "If you wouldn't mind hurrying along, you happen to be scaring away my customers."  
Allan seemed about to open his mouth but thought better of it and nodded, putting on the mask of a stupid villager. "My apologies sir. I should have known she wasn't ready to leave the house yet. Two days after our son was born and all."  
The oil man paled a bit at the word son.  
Allan slipped his arms around me picking me up in his arms. "Bed rest for you." He gave the oil man a winning smile and walked away taking larger strides with each step.  
"Allan, put me down."  
"But my dear Siobhan, you are in such a weak state."  
I smacked him in the chest. "Oh yes. How could I forget? So what is our son's name again?"  
He smiled letting me slide to my feet keeping a good pace as we exited the gates. "Well our first son's name is Thomas, for my brother. The second was named for your father."  
"Alastair? That seems an unfortunate name."  
Allan smiled. "I don't know. It is a different name, but I like it. Our first daughter-"  
"Allan exactly how many children do we have?"  
"I thought you wanted a big family?"  
I shook my head laughing. "You know, sometimes I take for granted that most people zone out when I speak."  
"So our first daughter, you can pick her name."  
I rolled my eyes. "How gracious of you. I would name her after my mother, Róisín."  
"All right. So her middle name is my mother's name. I would never willingly let any of my daughter's bare the first name of Constance."  
"And why is that? I rather like it."  
"It sounds much too respectable."

* * *

I was doubled over laughing by the time we had finally gotten into camp. "Allan, I don't think that could be possible."  
He grinned turning to Robin. "Robin, what's the largest family you've ever heard of?"  
"Fifteen children, two died in infancy though. Why?"  
"There you go Siobhan, we have thirteen children."  
Much who was in the middle of chopping vegetables paused. "Pardon, what?"  
I gave a laugh. "It was a long walk back, Allan decided to name all of our future children."  
Robin rose an eyebrow at that. "Firstly, why do the two of you have thirteen children? Secondly, did you bring any money?"  
"Our little ploy involved me falling down by all the most corrupt salesmen in town today." I shivered. "I swear had one more of those men attempted to touch me again..."  
Will came into the clearing with John at that moment. "What?"  
I smiled waving toward Allan. "You explain."  
He held his palms up at Will's look. "I didn't let anything to happen to her. You should know me better than that. Siobhan would go a few feet ahead of me and faint. When the sales man went to check on her I'd fill her satchel with all their money from their cart and rescue my darling wife." He laughed and upturned my satchel. The satchel relieved itself of all the coin it held. Only the sturdy stitching had kept the satchel from tearing apart.  
Everyone seemed impressed, even Robin's eyes grew wide.  
I jumped up and walked over the our treasure trove. Lifting my skirt I detached a few pouches from the lining of my skirt where I had tied them. "Can't forget these."  
Djaq's eyes widened. "And what are those from?"  
"Allan taught me a few new pick pocketing tricks."  
"No, no. I mean how did you get them to stay?"  
My smile widened as I went to her side showing her part of the wining of my skirt. "I stitched extra loops inside the lining of the skirt. This way if someone besides you ever attempts to hold me up by more force than I can handle, they won't find my money."  
She nodded with a smile. "Very clever."  
"I thought so. I could make you one if you'd like. It's rather easy, plus they are quite comfortable."  
"I think I will take you up on that offer." Djaq smiled then turned to Allan. "So are you going to tell us the names of your children?"  
Allan grinned. "Thomas, Alastair, Róisín, Benjamin, Constance, Donovan, Trinity, Serenity, Roger, Aislinn, Mallory, Logan, and lastly Robin."  
Robin laughed. "Well thank you for that."  
"The least we could do for introducing us."  
Will's jaw was clenched at this time. He could care less about most of the joking Allan and I had, but apparently joking about having thirteen children was a bit much for him.  
I went by his side, squeezing his hand a bit. "In truth, I don't know about thirteen children. Exactly how many were you thinking of Will?"  
He looked down at me taken aback. "What?"  
"Sorry?"  
"Wait what?"  
I grinned turning back to Robin. "Problem solved. I've now gotten him so confused he doesn't remember why he was mad."  
Robin laughed. "Confusion always seemed to be your favorite way to get out of trouble."  
I shrugged. "I tend to stick to the ways that work best."  
I felt Will rest his hands on my shoulders. "How does six children sound?"  
I tilted my head back to look at him. "Six?"  
"Six."  
"Can we all stop talking about me having children now? Because I'm getting a bit uncomfortable."  
Will laughed. "Well you asked."  
I moved from his arms toward Robin. "So fearless leader, how goes the money count?"  
He frowned. "Are you and Allan going to split whatever you won today?"  
"Allan?"  
Allan nodded. "I know better than to argue. I've have the unfortunate pleasure of previously hearing the many ways you and Djaq can kill people. I like to think I still have a good few years ahead of me."  
Robin nodded. "Well, the two of you are in the lead. However, I have a very promising lead on how to increase our 'fortune' and deter the Sheriff and the Black Knights from their plot."  
"Well, are you going to tell us?" John was leaning on his staff looking eager.  
Robin laughed. "Patience John. Plus, I have an offer for our little Siobhan."  
"Why am I always 'little' Siobhan?"  
"Because you're the youngest. On with my offer. Would you like to help us?"  
"As long as I don't have to be arrested again."  
"No, you don't have to let yourself get arrested."  
"Then I'm in."

* * *

"The war chest?"  
Robin nodded. "The war chest."  
I shook my head taking the torch he handed me. "And you brought me in because?"  
"You're quick. You're just as fast as Marian, maybe a bit faster since you don't seem to care about flair."  
"So, booby traps." I grinned.  
"Mainly yes."  
"Robin, honestly all you had to do was ask." I passed the torch to Much and tied back my hair, making sure nothing got in my way. "Will what do you need?"  
He smiled at me. "Just your eyes."  
I nodded feeling out the brick on my side as Robin stepped forward. The stone beneath his foot gave way and Will lurched forward pulling him back.  
I flattened myself against the other wall as arrows shot from a stone griffin's mouth embedding themselves in the door.  
Robin looked up at Will. "Will?"  
I removed a stone as he came over. "Found the wheel."  
"Will, what's this?" Much was on the ground finger prodding a small nearly translucent wire.  
"Much don't touch that!" Will's voice followed mine as we could hear howling from down the hall. Great, just what we needed around now. Guards and dogs.  
Will and I switched placed as he moved the wheel.  
Robin and I moved forward, but I put a hand to his chest. "I'm lighter than you. I'll feel the stones move before you do."  
I moved forward and heard guards moving beside me as spikes emerged from behind me. A gate. I knew I had to move, but my legs were frozen.  
Allan yanked me back into his arms as the spikes of the gate closed into the brick. Thankfully I was on the right side of the gate to escape.  
My breath came a little faster. I wrapped my hands around the arm he had across my chest. "I will thank you when I can properly breathe again."  
"The Sheriff's war chest." Robin had his hands wrapped around the iron of the gate staring at the chest. "This is our ticket lads."  
Will grabbed a torch from Djaq. "Robin, we've got to go. We're not equipped."  
Two guard dogs came running down the hall and Allan grabbed my hand pulling me along his side. "Robin, dogs!"  
Robin was still by the gate nodding. "I know. But we'll be back."

* * *

I turned from the window frowning. "This is not a good idea."  
"Well I really don't have much of a choice."  
I gave a sigh. "Marian, what am I going to do with you?"  
"Siobhan, nothing. You're my friends not my protector."  
"I'm both. And don't spout disgust at Robin. This is my call as well. I can't help you if I can't keep an eye on you. Gisborne has gotten you out of Knighton so that eliminated most of the protection I can give you without getting in your hair."  
Marian fell silent running her fingers over a quilt I had rescued. It was the first and last project she had ever worked on with her mother. She had only been about five at the time, but Edward used to love telling everyone about the hours Marian would spend making sure all the quilt squares were perfectly even. "I know I never say thank you enough. For that I am sorry. I know all you do and if I ever take it for granted I am sorry. I guess I can't believe all of this. Robin leave five years ago and I think I'm finally protecting myself. I forget you were always a step behind me. Actually a step ahead most of the time."  
I held in the sigh I wanted release. "Marian trying to make me feel guilty isn't going to work. By now you should know that at least. I want to keep my friends safe in any way I possibly can. If that means I have to act like I'm baby sitting you than so be it." I moved back to the window sitting on the sill. "So the Sheriff said buy yourself a new gown?"  
"The more cheap looking the better."  
I scoffed. "I don't do cheap looking." I paused smiling. "But I know where to get fabric of fancy colors and the sort of attention that the Sheriff is looking for. Plus maybe a certain forest outlaw may be out for a stroll."  
She grinned. "Than what are we waiting for?"

* * *

"Siobhan, you kill me. I've seen your work. This color? It makes me want to cry just seeing it in your hands. Even with all of your talents you couldn't make a respectable dress."  
I smiled shaking my head at Rafael. "My friend if I had a choice...at least the fabric is soft. This is a job for the Sheriff."  
"The visitor coming? Who do you have to, what is the phrase?"  
"Tart up?"  
Rafael placed a hand over his heat looking wounded. "Bella gioia, you wound me with that mouth of yours. Words like that shouldn't come out of you. But yes that is what I was wondering. New mistress in the castle?"  
I shook my head leaning in as Marian's guard was distracted by much and John starting a fight. I always knew Much could cause a distraction. "Worse yet. Sheriff wants to use Marian to show off. He requested certain things, flashy mostly. Yet, you seem to underestimate my skills." I glanced back at the color of the fabric. "Perhaps I overestimate my skills."  
Rafael laughed. "Bella, your skills are the best I have seen and this old man has seen a lot. If anyone can make the Lady Marian look impressive in such regretful colors it is you. Anything else I can offer you?"  
"I don't suppose you have anything in a lovely sapphire?"  
He laughed. "You're a mind reader little one. It just so happens I received a special shipment from my cousin back in Naples. It will bring out your eyes perfectly." From beneath the counter he handed me a wrapped parcel. "Do with it whatever you want. This is repayment for all ou've done for my family."  
I shook my head reaching for more money. "Rafael, please. Let me pay. Anything I do is because I can. I can pay that isn't a problem."  
He shook his head forcing the parcel into my hands. "No. You pay for this color for the Lady. This is a present for you. Think of it as a belated birthday present. Or early seeing as the new year already started. You bring medicine to the house and you brought all seven of my grandchildren into this world. This is the least I can do."  
I leaned over the counter kissing the old man's cheek. "Grazie."  
"Prego! Your Italian is getting better."  
I laughed wrapping everything up to put it in my satchel. "I learn a bit more every time I see your wife and kids. I'm a fast learner."  
Will appeared at my shoulder. "Time to go. You need to head back to the cottage or can you come for a bit?"  
"I can come for a while. Marian already has something to wear in her room, and I can stitch her other without seeing her today. I have her measurements memorized. Where are we going?"  
"We're visiting an old friend."

* * *

I stood inside the door grinning. It had been a long time since I had seen Stephen. I'd been a little girl when he had stopped working, but that never stopped Dan and Will from visiting. After all it was Stephen who had worked with Dan when they were younger. They'd gone into trade together and Stephan was Will's godfather. Only when he had completely lost his vision had he left Locksley. His memory was still very sharp as were his other senses.  
Stephan felt around Will's face nodding with each touch. "Will. Still passionate. Still angry."  
"There's much to be angry about."  
"And your skills? You are still using them, not letting them go to waste?"  
"I'm with Robin Hood now."  
Stephan smiled. "Good that is not a waste." He paused seeming to feel out the room. "And who is waiting by the door?"  
I took slow steps forward. "I don't supposed you'd remember me sir. It was at least eight years since I last saw you."  
Stephan reached a hand out and I moved closer to he could feel my cheeks. "This couldn't be little Siobhan? The girl that Will got into so much trouble."  
I laughed. "That would be me. I'm surprised you remembered."  
He smiled patting my cheek. "I could never forget the stories Dan would tell. The little one Will would drag around on one of his adventures. Got you in a lot of trouble from what I can recall. I remember your mother quite well. Such a beautiful woman. You sound just like her."  
Will smiled. "I promise you Stephan she looks just like her as well."  
Djaq picked up a box on the table and within a moment Stephan pointed his staff at her. "Don't touch that please."  
"I've seen this work before. Persian, no?"  
"It was my wife's."  
"I apologize."  
"The men who died. They had wives and children. I want them to be taken care of."  
Robin nodded. "I can promise that. You have my word. If there's any information you can tell us about the strong room it would help us."  
And that's when Allan made a stupid mistake. He questioned on how a blind man could help us. With that he was promptly knocked over by Stephan's staff. I held back the laughter as Stephen helped him back up, explaining that when one loses one sense the others sharpen. Allan frowned heading out of the hut. He'd be back when he regained some of his pride.  
As it turned out Stephen was the one who designed the strong room. He could help quite a bit.  
"Thank you Stephan. For all the help you can give us. Before we go any further though I need to send someone back to their other duty." Robin turned to me pointing toward the door.  
"Robin..."  
"No whining. I need you to keep any tabs you can around the castle. With this new count, we'll need to be doubly prepared. Plus I want you to make sure if Marian gets in too deep, we can pull her out."  
"She'll never leave without her father."  
"Siobhan."  
"I'm leaving, I'm leaving."

* * *

I hurried into the castle courtyard hoping to catch a glimpse of this count. I raised an eyebrow watching him kiss Marian's hand. Tying Fabian to the horse post I untied my basket from his saddle approaching the group before me.  
The Sheriff turned and clapped his hands. "Siobhan, sometimes I believe you can read minds. I was just thinking of you." He turned to the count. "This is our seamstress, Siobhan. She may not look like much, but she's quite skilled."  
I curtsied. "A pleasure." I cocked my head to the side taking in his outfit. "That is a very interesting pattern count. Cotton, with silk-no-satin lapels."  
He smiled nodding. "Impressive. Perhaps I can get in a fitting during my stay. I would like to see some of your work."  
I smiled watching Marian roll her eyes over his shoulder. "If you're planning to stay around for any amount of time you will be able to see my work. Most of those in the castle wear something I have created. Everything Lady Marian wears I have created, or had some hand in adding detail to."  
He nodded impressed.  
I curtsied again. "Lady Marian, I will begin working on your new dress, and add the new details you requested." I nodded my head to the Sheriff and Gisborne. "I have all of your mending I will have delivered to your rooms. If anything else is needed, all you need to do is ask."  
I made my way inside quickly choosing a different staircase catching sight of Tobias. That was not something I wanted to deal with right now.  
I wasn't even up ten steps before I heard my name.  
"Siobhan."  
I closed my eyes counting to ten before turning around. "Tobias."  
"It's always nice to see your face."  
"Even though your friend has told you to stay as far away from me as possible?"  
He lifted a hand to my cheek. "I do not have to listen to everything Guy says. I am still my own man, and just as he I have my own desires."  
I pulled my knife without thinking pressing it against his throat. "Tobias, I thought you had learned your lesson before. I am no one's prize. Do not treat me as such. No one may force me to do anything against my will. I could kill you without a second thought and place the blame off me. The Sheriff may not be entirely fond of me, but he knows my value. I might spend time in the prisons, but he would not kill me for getting rid of one of his guards. You are just as expendable as any of the others. Perhaps even more so since you seem to have already been causing him problems."  
"What problems?"  
"You think word hasn't spread about you taken advantage of that girl? The girl who just so happened to be the daughter of a noble? Sir Guy covered it up by killing off one of the night guards. I highly doubt he will continue to kill off his own men just to cover for you, no matter who your parents happen to be." I pressed the knife tighter against his throat. "Do we have an understanding?"  
He gritted his teeth. "Yes."  
"Good." I released the knife but slashed at his hand and flew up the stairs. I may not have ever been one for running away, but I didn't want to push my luck. Better to make a point and run, than attempt to stand your ground and be beaten around.

* * *

"You want me to come ride with you?" I blinked at Marian watching her put on a riding coat. "I must have missed something."  
"No, I have a plan for helping Robin get to the chest. The count is offering to help us."  
"Really? And your plan to Robin?"  
"Well, since there will be girls pouring drinks, Djaq can position herself as a waitress and pass word to Robin. I would say you, but I don't think that would work well."  
"And the dresses?"  
Marian smiled holding up a yellow dress and small decorative hat. "I grabbed one for you on my way up. I didn't have much time to look at sizing."  
I grinned grabbing it. "They're making the servant girls wear this? Oh goddess you could not pay me enough. Don't worry about size, I can work with this."  
"I haven't yet seen anything you couldn't work with."  
"And I highly doubt you ever will. I'll head out with you."

* * *

Djaq held up the yellow. "This?"  
I covered my eyes. "I know it's terrible, but with your coloring it might just look nice. Your skin is dark enough to make that yellow glow."  
"Siobhan..."  
"Djaq, I promise this will be as painless as possible."  
"I haven't worn a dress for a good time."  
I gave her sad eyes. "But Djaq, you have such a nice figure, you can't deny me from making you a dress. Please? I never get to have any fun. I mean you get to stay at camp all the time, and you get to-"  
She held up her hands in surrender. "Fine, fine! You're making me feel horrid."  
I did a little dance watching Marian get back on her horse. "Djaq said yes!"  
She gave a laugh. "Why do you get so excited whenever someone says yes?"  
"Because it's like having a life sized doll."  
Marian blinked. "And the boys?"  
"I control them with clothing."  
Allan watched me with widened eyes. "You can be a little scary at times."  
Robin grabbed my shoulders turning me back toward camp. "Hurry with this dress, we need to move soon. Don't get excessively creative."  
I sighed dramatically."Take all the fun out of my life." I shook my head grabbing a spool of thread and sticking some pins in my mouth running after Djaq. "I know, I know. Deadline."

* * *

Djaq and I went in the side entrance. Since Marian had invited me I had been forced to make a stop at home and get changed.  
She played with the front of her dress glaring at me. "You made the neckline lower didn't you?"  
I shook my head. "These are not even my designs. I have nothing to do with this. Stop complaining you look lovely."  
"Why don't you mind the neckline on your dress?"  
I smiled. "Because this is a corset top dress of my own design. Makes me look more innocent. Well, makes me look like I'm not concealing any weapons."  
"And how many weapons are you concealing tonight?"  
"Sadly only six."  
She nodded. "Six of eight."  
"You remembered." I smiled. I was always glad Djaq was on our side.  
Djaq smiled. "Some things are important to remember. Remembering how well your friends can defend themselves is one of those important things."  
We kept our heads slightly down as Gisborne walked by. "You."  
Djaq stopped and I kept on ahead knowing to meet her at the end of the furthest hall. Outside the doors I took off on a run circling around to check guard activity.  
Djaq met with me smiling. "Wanted me to keep the Count's goblet filled at all times."  
I gave a laugh. "There are only two guards on for this hallway. They should be here any minute. Sit down and presented to have hurt your ankle."  
Djaq nodded, seating herself on the floor as the guards entered the hallway. "My ankle. I was hurrying through the doors. I think I broke it."  
I raised my head hoping I looked concerned. "I don't think I can get her to help by myself. Could you help me?"  
The guards walked over to a closer look. Bad move. The one to the left was down with a punch to the face and swift kick in the chest. The one on the right was out before he touched ground. Amazing what can happen with one swift kick to the head into a stone wall.  
I grinned at Djaq. "You know, these female bonding times are a lot of fun. We should do this more often."  
"Men are so obvious." Djaq laughed moving to open the garbage shoot as I grabbed the keys.  
I watched each of the men climb out all staring at Djaq.  
Will blinked a few times not moving.  
"What?"  
"Nothing."  
John pushed him out of the way helping Allan out.  
Allan grinned. "You need to dress like a girl more often."  
"Oh I do do I?"  
"I'm just saying." He caught me laughing. "You do have a tal-He ooked over my dress and his grin grew. "And you need to dress like that more often." He walked around me taking in the whole outfit. "I'm not being funny, but if this is how you dress when you're not with us, I'm going to feel a bit insulted."  
I put a hand on his chest smiling. "Where would the fun be if I worse things like this all the time. I never get flattery like this every day."  
He kissed my cheek pulling me along. "Yeah well if I didn't think Will would kill me in my sleep I might say something more often."

* * *

Robin handed the torch to Much letting Will and I each take a side as he knelt by the floor.  
He pushed the bobby trapped step down as Will and I pressed against our respective walls.  
Nothing.  
"Where are the arrows?" Robin looked around then motioned Will forward.  
As Will moved the stone an arrow shot out striking the sack over his shoulder. "That wasn't there before." His eyes betrayed his calm tone.  
I moved forward pulling out the arrow and sniffed the tip. "Poison. Smells like hemlock and I think belladonna."  
"They've changed the sequence." Robin hit a fist to the wall.  
Much shook his head. "If they changed the sequence we cannot go tonight. All the training is for nothing."  
"If we do not go tonight all the money will go to the Black Nights."  
John nodded. "We go."  
Much shook his head. "If we die don't come running to me."  
John moved forward as Will moved the stone. Robin waited a moment and kicked open the door letting John rush forward. He stuck his quarterstaff in the path of the gate jamming it.  
Robin turned around. "Djaq, tell Marian we're in. Allan, Much, keep watch. Siobhan, are you sure you still want to do this?"  
I nodded. "Like I said Robin, being just a bit lighter can mean a few extra moments."  
"Then we need to hurry." He slide though the gate pulling me next to him.  
Thankfully there was just enough room so I did not tear my clothing. Amazing thing corsets. If you did not have much of a bosom you immediately gained one. If you were like me and already had one, it make it much more presentable. That was all fine and ell unless you needed to slip past spikes.  
Robin pointed to the hour glass clapping Much on the shoulder. "Do not take your eyes off the hourglass understand?"  
Much nodded eyes suddenly fixated on the glass.  
Robin shots two arrows into the wood frame handing one to me. "It's now or never."  
I lifted myself up first winging across the room and dropped to my feet. Robin was only a second behind me, but somehow set off another trap of a swinging saw. As he fell to the ground arrows shot over his head and mine.  
I hit the floor trying to crawl forward. "Robin, don't move yet. Let me help you across."  
He nodded trying to move forward and the floor gave out just as he rolled to the side. Wonderful, a fiery pit underneath the room.  
"Now will you listen?"  
"Fine, but hurry."  
I flew across certain steps, taking care to study their cracks. Helping Robin to his feet I held him in place. "Listen, step where I step. Don't do anything stupid."  
That worked fine. Until we made it in front of the chest. Then Robin took a step to his right.  
"Robin! Siobhan!" Will's voice called our attention to the swinging pendulum.  
I pushed Robin forward and we both fell on our knees on the podium where the chest rested.  
I slowly rose to my feet. "You know it's never a dull moment with you Robin."  
He frowned at me turning to the chest. He swore removing a plate of glass. "It's an illusion. The money is not here."  
I shook my head vigorously. "No, no, no. This can't be. It-" I stopped pointed to the walls.  
Robin fell silent as we listened. We both froze staring at the pedestal we were leaning against and pushed away the top. In this case all that glittered was not just gold, but silver as well.  
Robin grinned at me. "Get the bags."  
I turned around. "Much, the bags, hurry up."  
He tossed them over as Robin and I made our way filling up all the bags we could and tossing them back to the others.  
Much screamed. "Hurry! Why must we always leave everything to the last second?"  
Robin shook his head laughed as the lead started pouring out of the stone gargoyles mouthes. "I think it's time to go. Don't you think Siobhan?"  
I grinned. "I can't think of a better time."

* * *

I smiled as everyone said their goodbyes to the count and Stephen the next morning.  
As the count boarded his carriage I held up a finger. "Count. I do have a present for you."  
He looked taken aback. "For me?"  
I nodded pulling out a parcel. "I, uh, couldn't sleep last night and remembered what you said about my work. I hope you don't mind. I fixed up one of your jackets."  
He opened the parcel and his mouth fell open. I smiled internally quite pleased. I loved that reaction from people newly introduced with my work. What had been a simple ruby colored jacket was newly adorned with fancy gold and onyx stitching. The labels were lined with black fur as were the cuffs.  
"My dear lady, you did this all in one night?"  
Will laughed. "You should see what she can do when she's fully awake."  
The count gave me a bow. "My lady I thank you graciously. Lady Siobhan, am I correct?"  
I nodded. "Yes sir."  
"Indeed I will have to send you fabrics from my part of the world. That is the least I can do to repay you. If you are ever in need of a place to escape know that my home will always be open to you. Especially if you ever need to find better working conditions."  
I curtsied smiling widely. "I thank you sir, full and truly."

* * *

We were leaving the second village after dropping off food and money.  
Much went off on an idea of going to Germany if things ever got too bad in England.  
Robin laughed. "Oh? Going to be Count Much of Swatzenlebienswuezenlaben?"  
"Exactly. Count of Swaze-ladedoda."  
Will smiled. "I think you need to be able to pronounce the placed you will be count of."  
"I don't think I have to."  
Allan smiled clapping Much on the shoulder. "No mate. It's better to be Sovereign of Sherwood."  
Robin nodded. "Sovereigns of Sherwood. I like the sound of that."  
I raised and eyebrow. "And do Djaq and I get special titles?"  
Allan thought for a moment then placed an arm around both our shoulders. "How about Ladies of the Lake."  
"Allan..."  
"Okay, okay. Empresses of the true England?"  
I laughed. "Allan, please. Just stop."  
"Dames of Dale?" He grinned at that one.  
"Now you're just pushing it."

* * *

**A/N:  
I hate sunlight. Having pale skin like mine is just another reason to stay in the shade.  
But NOOOOOO I get dragged into sunlight and gain second degree burns...that was wearing 50 suntan lotion. Not as bad as last year at least...  
Blah blah Blah. You know how we all have that one episode we can't wait to rewrite? Mine is episode 4. So bare with me.  
Anyway on to the thank yous that are deserved:  
QuietOne364: Glad you like it, hopefully you continue to like it.  
instantstar15: I'm glad you rally enjoy this, I hope it lives up to the first one.  
Horatiofan101: Yay! I have some of my old reviewers back. I've missed you all and wanted to do this for a while. Unfortunately it was taken off of youtube. BUT I recently found I have BBC American on demand. For FREE!! Robin Hood for FREE!! Okay I'll stop my little outburst now. Anyway, I've been out of school, but I don't graduate until Sunday, it's a tradition thing. Congrads for you as well.**


	3. A Comprimise

**Disclaimer: I have no ownership over anything that has to do with the BBC or Robin Hood. If I did let's just say I would have had a really fun prom date.  
Also do not use the lyrics to Hushabye Mountain...I was tired...**

* * *

"You are eating squirrels? Looks like I came just in time."  
The camp looked up and Djaq looked up laughing. "Maybe you can convince them salads are not always bad."  
I laughed. "I've learned to no longer argue when I can't win. Healthy eating isn't exactly one of their favorite things I have learned. Salads may be a bit much, but I sneak in apples and berries when I can. Apparently, Robin didn't mention I was brining food?"  
Will looked up mouth stuffed. "Whatcha got?"  
"Well if the big strong men wouldn't mind getting off their lazy bums there are about four traps out there with pheasants and a very annoyed turkey."  
"Turkey?"  
"Siobhan that might have to wait." I turned as Robin led a young boy into camp. "This is-"  
"Siobhan!" Daniel rushed into my arms, shaking slightly.  
I wrapped him closer looking over Robin's head. "I know who he is Robin. What's going on?"  
"His friends are in trouble. Unless I'm mistaken it doesn't bode to well for us either. Everyone needs to arm up." He turned to me. "Are you coming?"  
I looked down at Daniel. "Playing Robin Hood again?"  
"Yes."  
I sighed. "I'm coming Robin, I know exactly who we are looking for. I brought all these boys into this world, I'd like to see they stay here. I don't like outliving little ones."  
Robin smiled. "How many children have you helped deliver?"  
"Matilda doesn't do as many as she used to, and I'm one of the few good midwives around. I've taken care of Lockely for a while now. Most any child under the age of eight I assisted with. Anyone four or under I brought in myself. For the most part, you get the idea."  
"Well, then you and Will should have no problem with only six."  
We turned back as Daniel's eyes grew big finding out who everyone was. I moved beside Djaq to grab my bag as Daniel stared at John. It was a little boy meeting a creature of legend for the first time. In other words very cute and highly amusing.  
John shrugged into his coat staring at the boy. "What?"  
"Nothing. I just thought you'd be taller. You know, like a giant."  
John looked taken aback. "I'm quite tall thank you."  
Djaq grinned winking at me. "Most men seem to lie about their size."  
I grinned. "Well-"  
Robin clapped a hand over my mouth. "Do you mind if we go check on the others?"

* * *

I slid down the hill with Daniel as we realized everyone had left. I settled a bit away from where Robin was reassuring Daniel checking the abandoned rope. They hadn't been gone long. The rock where Gisborne and his men has presumably tied up the boys was still warm. I sent up a silent prayer we would find them soon.  
"Robin, they haven't left too long ago." I pointed. "The rock is still warm."  
Will rushed over. "Robin there are tracks. Headed back to Locksley."  
"Then that is where we're headed." He motioned everyone forward, but held me back with him. I thought he was mad until I saw him grinning. "They play outlaws?"  
"It's a growing game among the different villages. They like hearing the stories of Robin and his friends. It keeps everyone's spirits up and that's important nowadays."  
"Have we been playing storyteller?"  
I bowed my head. "It's a gift. The boys asked me about any stories I knew of. It's not much of a secret among friends mine is a safe house for all of you. The boys come to me for stories and asked who each was most like."  
"And? I would love to hear how you picked each boy's character."  
"There is a reason Daniel plays Robin Hood. He's stubborn, hard headed, and for some reason the others listen to him. Mark, his little cousin, happens to be a lot like Will. Sits around whittling and listens to anything his big brother says. Also happens to have a bit of a short temper. Joseph is John. He uses his extra two inches of height to his advantage, and he's the only one who will bother to break up the fights. Then George is Allan. He can outsmart anyone, and get out of trouble because he really does have the most innocent smile. There's only four of them and I'm quite thankful for that. I don't think the world could deal with another Much or Djaq."  
"So no little girls play?"  
I shook my head. "I never said that. The girls just don't seem to travel in the same groups as the boys."  
"I feel a bit scared to ask, but why?"  
I grinned. "I would like you to picture a group of girls with a miniature Djaq, Marian, and Siobhan. With most of the same tributes."  
"That is rather intimidating."  
"It also is quite entertaining. But, I don't know. It reminds me a bit of how we grew up. Being out numbered by the boys. We just never gave in just because we were the girls of the group. I miss that a bit. Things were simple back then."  
Robin put a hand to my back continuing on. I should have realized something was wrong when he slowed his speech waiting until Daniel had run to get ahead of the others. "Siobhan, do you remember something I told you a while back? It was right after Marian moved back into the castle and you had a run in with Tobias. You made a big long speech about how you can't let people constantly hurt you."  
I looked ahead not meeting his eyes. I didn't think I liked where this was headed. "Yes."  
"Have you thought about what I said? About how maybe you should listen to your own advice?"  
"I've thought about it."  
"Siobhan." Robin pulled at the back of my shirt. "I am serious about this. I love all of my gang, nothing will change that. I just watch you and I can't help but wonder if encouraging you staying with Will is a good idea."  
I met his eyes and shook my head. "Please Robin, don't do this."  
"Siobhan...times are changing. It is possible that you and Will just aren't meant to be."  
I moved back. "Robin, please..."  
"Everything okay?" Will had doubled back and was looking worriedly at me. He hadn't looked at me like that in a while. There were a few ways he hadn't looked at me in a while come to think of it. It wasn't just need of having seeing me, the longing when he saw me was gone.  
I just shook my head and ran to catch up with the others. I had a suddenly felt so very small. It was like being a little girl again. Feeling small. I hated this feeling.

* * *

I got lost in the woods when I was six. My mother was gathering plants and she let me wander off. She always said to stay close and the fey would protect me. She said the fey always looked on her people with kind eyes. I wouldn't be hurt as long as I didn't go too far. I didn't know what it was and I didn't know why, but I walked off. I ran farther and faster than I ever had. Something just made me keep running.  
I came to a lake with huge boulders placed in random parts. Maybe the parts weren't random. Possibly they had been shaped while the lake grew and formed. I still don't remember much. My mind was completely blank and all I knew was I had to get to the rock in the center. I climbed on the rock and waited.  
The sound of rushing water lulled me into a calm I will possibly never know again. It would put me to sleep if I let it. Water lapped up the sides kissing the tips of my fingers as I let them rest over the sides of the rock. I didn't look at my reflection, something about that thought scared me. I watched my shadow, but I didn't want to see myself. It was only as dusk came and threw my shadow away that I looked over the side of the rock. Then I couldn't see anything. It was simply a black pool reflecting a bare outline and the moon overhead.  
I watched fireflies all night. Never before had I ever seen something so beautiful. Simple golden lights dipping close to the black reflecting water. The lights soon doubled bringing a smile to my face as I watched the beautiful light show. I stayed there all night watching as the light show drifted letting the sun dawn overhead.  
When the sun had risen over the trees and the last glimmer of the moon vanished I headed home. I was a little dirty, but no worse for the wear. I had cleaned my face and arms in the water and brushed myself off best I could.  
Even today I could still see everything in front of me. My mother was praying by the side of our house while the others were planning new places to look for me. She was the one that saw me first. She looked at calm as ever, minus the tear tracks down her face. Letting out a little cry she ran forward holding me close. Everyone followed shortly after, touching my hair and face making sure I was alright.  
I just looked up at all of them, answering every question at once. Every question finally stated and I said one thing, just one and only once. _"No one found me."_  
I never remember seeing my mother cry like the other mothers did. That was the only day I ever saw her cry. She brought me straight home and would not let me leave her sight for three days.  
There was a reason Robin treated me differently from Marian, and it wasn't just because he was in love with her. Robin promised my mother after that day he would always take care of me. He always watched over me like I was his own sister. The same time I was born his mother gave birth to a little girl who died a few weeks after birth. I guess part of him believed I could be his little sister. I appreciated that, but I also appreciated him giving me my own space. Whereas everyone else seemed to hold me at arms length Robin seemed to hold my hand. He was the brother I always knew I had, and though I was loathe to admit it, I needed him.  
So these years later when I realized he needed me back, I was happy to help him in any way I could. Currently this meant watching over Daniel. And answering his incessant questions.  
"Siobhan, I thought you just knew Robin. I didn't know you went to his camp all the time."  
"That's the point Daniel. No one should know. Keeping people in the dark keeps them safe. I keep you all safe by not telling you how close I am."  
"And they keep you safe by not letting you live with them?"  
I sighed. "Not exactly. It has more to do with my being more useful closer to the castle."  
"I thought that was why Lady Marian was living in the castle."  
I tried to think of a retort when an arrow landed an inch away from Much's hand.  
Will looked at the arrow. "It's the back door plan."  
Djaq nodded. "You go with John. We'll be here if you need us."

* * *

"I hate when you at all twitchy. You're instincts are better than most. When you're uneasy there's usually something to be afraid of."  
I stared at Much. "Honestly, shut up Much. Did you ever think I might be twitchy for personal reasons?" If anything that would get him to shut up.  
He paused. "Did you have to say I was the servant?"  
I banged my head against Djaq's shoulder. "Is he on about this again?"  
"Well I don't like waiting. Especially behind a cow. It's not good for my constitution. And-"  
"Much! Shush." Daniel's voice was irritated and clear, though he kept watching for Will and John. Hopefully they would be with the other boys.  
Djaq, Allan, and I shared a grin. He sounded just like Robin. Even better Much had fallen silent.  
Will was running forward with Joseph and George.  
Daniel spoke what I was thinking. "Where's Mark?"  
Will squeezed his shoulder. "It's okay, he's with John." He looked toward the rest of us. "John needs us. Siobhan-"  
"I'll watch the boys, you can handle the rest. I know how it goes Will."  
He stood giving me a funny look while the others moved toward the barn. "What's wrong?"  
I shook my head running my hand over George's head while Joseph held my hand. "Nothing, just go help the others, I'll wait by the baker's house for you all."  
Will gave me another curious look before running after Djaq toward the barn.  
I swore as I saw Robin fall out of the door, Gisborne coming after him.  
Daniel ran forward and I grabbed him. His eyes grew. "Siobhan, let go. You never leave a friend behind if you can help it. You taught me that."  
I nodded letting him go, tossing him his sling shot. If Daniel could do anything it was cause a distraction. And he was damned fast.  
My eyes followed him watching at he hit Gisborne in the head and helped Robin up. Robin gave me a salute pushing Daniel onward. Damned good shot that boy was.  
I pushed George and Joseph behind the baker's house, meeting her outside. I gave he a wide smile. "Julia, always a pleasure."  
She gave me a look, glancing at George and Joseph. "Doing a favor for Robin?"  
"When am I not? You know the boys. Before you ask their parents are in Clun. The boys were only supposed to come here to buy a few chicken if they could find them." My eyes fell on the boys who both put their heads down, afraid to meet my eyes. "But since Daniel is still living in Locksley they decided to play outlaws before going into town."  
"Honest Siobhan, we're sorry. We just, don't get to play much anymore." George gave me sad eyes as he hugged my waist. "We don't mean to worry you."  
Joseph stood behind nodding. "We want to help with anything else we can. It's our fault."  
Julia rolled her eyes. "So, you going to visit Robin I suppose."  
"That would be the plan, why?"  
She smiled and grabbed a basket form inside the door. "I have breads for him. I met up with Will last time he was here and he gave me the saddest look. Said something about eating squirrels? I am shocked Siobhan. I wouldn't think you would feed your Will squirrels."  
I took the basket from her frowning. "That would be Much, not myself. I haven't gone there to cook in a while." I gave the boys the basket at they went to sit by the edge of the fence.  
Julia met my eyes noticing something wasn't quite right. "Did you have a row with Will?"  
"Not exactly." I sighed. "We have our problems as to be expected. Plus Robin has been talking to me. Part of me thinks he makes sense and you know how much I hate agreeing with Robin when he brings up a topic first."  
She shook her head smiling. "I'm sure it will work itself out. I remember how annoying Robin can be. Just remember he does have your best interest at heart. I don't know how you would have made it out of childhood without him."  
I laughed relaxing. "I don't know how I made it out of childhood with him. Julia don't forget, he might have helped me out of many problems, but he was the one that put me in them."  
It was always pleasant talking to Julia. She was one of the few normal people who weren't directly associated with the gang and was female. Still I didn't want to bore her with my worries and issue. I really did miss Matilda. I think this was going to call for a visit sometime soon. She had always been more than a mother type figure. She was a friend. And though she was older she had a wicked sense of humor you wouldn't expect from a woman of her age.  
We both turned as Robin and the others appeared behind us.  
I took in the array of them and frowned. "Where's Daniel?"  
Robin's eyes widened as he watched the Sheriff come forward. Coming to stand by his side was Daniel. Of course he was being held up on either side by Tobias and Gisborne. Wonderful. I went to stand slightly behind Julia listening as Gisborne called to the villagers. He was sending a message to Robin. If he returned the box the boy would live. If not, Daniel would die. For most people this would be a bluff, however, since learning about the Black Knights I think the Gisborne would do anything to cover his hide, with the Sheriff's full blessings.  
I turned to Robin. "Plan?"  
"Trying to figure one out." He gave a half smile. "Don't suppose you could flirt with Tobias to get him back."  
"If by flirting you mean letting him kill me, because that's the only thing he wants from me now. I don't think he took too well to the threat last time."  
Will's eyes narrowed. "He approached you again?"  
I lifted a shoulder. "The night we stole the war chest. He might have grabbed me and I might have confronted him about the girl he raped."  
Now Robin was listening in and his face wasn't too happy. "Siobhan."  
"And I might have sliced his hand with my knife."  
Mark looked at me with a wide smile from the other side of John. "Cool!"  
I grinned grabbing hold of Mark and turning him in front of me like a human shield to fight off the now five sets of angry eyes. At least Djaq was amused.  
Mark blinked at the others then rose his face to look at me. "How come they all look angry? I'm glad you hurt Tobias. He's mean. He came to Clun with Gisborne a few weeks ago, I don't like him. He hurt Kurt."  
I smoothed Mark's hair down, bless his little heart he was distracting the angry men around me. Kurt was Mark's older brother, the same age as Will. We used to play together before his family moved to Clun. It wasn't far away, but basically we played with the children who lived right by us. "Kurt was being himself I suppose?"  
Mark nodded leaning into my legs and closing his eyes. "He spit at Gisborne and said some stuff. They beat him up and tied him to the center for everyone to see what happens when they don't follow the rules. Wouldn't let anyone touch him until after sundown. He's okay now, but mum was really worried."  
I lifted Mark in my arms carrying him on my hip as he wrapped his little arms around my neck. "Robin I promise you can point out and yell about all my faults later, but for now can we go back to camp? We've got food and the boys are exhausted. We need a plan as soon as possible."  
He nodded as we all turned to go. As the others went before us he grabbed my shoulder forcing me to listen carefully. "We will talk about this. Siobhan, I do not want you fighting him more than necessary. I know you don't like people hurting you, physically or otherwise, but you're baiting him. I don't like you doing that because I cannot protect you." He clapped a hand over my mouth. "You don't get to interrupt me right now. I know you don't need saving or protection, but I refused to let everyone I care about be hurt. I've always given you your space, but I refuse to stand by and watch you set yourself up to be hanged in the town square." He removed his hand from my mouth letting me know his speech was over.  
"Sometimes I think it would be a relief." I shook my head. "Robin I promise to refrain from doing anything stupid." I motioned him to walk with me toward camp. "I haven't told anyone else yet, but I've decided I need to go away for a while. It won't be far or for very. A week, perhaps two at most. Maybe a month or two down the road. I just don't have the time now. I wanted you to know first. Robin, I know you care and I know you see that I'm getting a little frazzled. I am taking care of myself and focusing on what's important. It's keeping me sane and I figured you'd appreciate that."  
"Perhaps you should take a month off. I think you need the rest."  
I shook my head adjusting Mark in my arms. "If I go away for a month I doubt I'd have a job to go back to. Then I'll be in trouble."  
Robin kissed the top of my head wrapping an arm around my waist. "You know I will always take care of you. The others as well. I'm sorry if I keep driving you insane with this whole talk, but I hate seeing you set yourself up to be hurt."  
"You've got to admit it though Robin, it's what I do best."  
"Get everyone to camp, make food, and I'll see you in a while. I need to go visit our castle friend. She should be able to think of something."  
"That's what she does best."

* * *

"Pirch, fast burning. Won't that work?"  
Everyone thought for a moment, trying to figure out what pirch was.  
"Pitch! Good thinking Mark!" Robin met my smile over Mark's head. "Aren't you so proud of your little ones?"  
"I'd say yes, but that might look like bragging."  
Will got a thoughtful look on his face. "I can duplicate the box, line it with pitch. The wood is thin enough to burn before they get to it. Add the pitch to that and yes, that will work."  
He went to working on his new invention while Mark chewed on the meat from Much's lot. I had still cooked someone of what had been captured in traps, but Much had insisted that the kids, who he believed to be unbiased, have what he cooked.  
Mark swallowed a piece of meat and looked up at Much. "Much, is this rat?"  
Much went on his tirade. Twice in one day? I think that might be a new record. "Does anyone else feel like running themselves ragged and finding large animals?"  
John and Djaq grinned pointing at me. "She has been catching food."  
Much spluttered and went to cleaning the kitchen area. He was still muttering under his breath violently so I decided helping him might not be the best idea.  
There were footsteps outside camp and Robin went out first, returning with Marian. She lay parchment on the table explaining her plan. She had drawn up a pass for herself to leave the castle to visit Gisborne. Beneath that parchment and with the Sheriff's signature was a forged pass releasing Daniel into one of the Sheriff's guard to be brought back tot he castle. Now it was just trying to figure out who would pretend to be the guard.  
Allan looked at the helmet and took it from Robin. "I'll do it."  
Marian looked at Allan thinking carefully. "You are aware of the dangers."  
He lifted a shoulder spinning the helmet. "I know, I'll be fine."  
"You're a brave man Allan."  
He smiled looking at the ground. "Yeah well, everyone needs to do something. Marian I'll give you a head start. It'll probably be better if you go in first."  
Marian nodded saying her goodbyes and left while the others cleaning up and prepared themselves for the coming morning.  
Will turned to look at me where I was picking up pheasant feathers and spoke low. "Is everything all right? You've seemed a bit off lately."  
"Just tired. Nothing else."  
Will reached out a hand taking my own carefully. "Siobhan, you've seemed a bit different."  
I met his face, thinking carefully before I spoke. "Since when?"  
He looked taken aback. "Well for a while now. You seem a bit different, a little distance I suppose." He ran his thumb over my knuckles. "What's wrong?"  
I chewed the inside of my cheek glad to see everyone was doing something productive. Of course Robin met my eyes over Will's head before going after Marian. "Things aren't the same and there are certain people who have a point about my feelings. I'm trying to figure things out on my own. If I seem a bit off, that's why."  
Will's eyes searched my face. "About us."  
"Will I really do not want to talk about this right now."  
His hand gripped mine harder. "Siobhan, this is about us." His voice was still low but anger was creeping into it. "I think I should know if this involves us."  
My voice came out in a low hiss. "That's just it. The way we've been lately there is no us. There's only you using me as an excuse for things. 'Oh because Siobhan', 'I'm with Siobhan', I don't even hear the 'because I love her' excuse anymore'."  
"Do you think it might be because I can't tell how you feel anymore?"  
"How I-" I jumped up and dragged him outside with me to keep the others from listening. "How I feel? Will, I'm not the one that acts caring one minute then as if I do not care the next. I am trying very hard to keep my feelings straight and in order. What are you doing?"  
Will laughed circling me. "Feelings in order? And what about you and Allan?"  
I shook my head at the sky. "Me and Allan. How is this always the argument you start with? Allan is my friend, we joke around just as I do with everyone else. Why do you always make him to be different than the others?"  
"Because of how he looks at you. The way he looks at you like there is nothing else in this world he could ever want. Like you are all he needs."  
I spun around. "And what's wrong with that? By the goddess, Will, what's wrong with being wanted? Answer me that?"  
"You are not with him."  
"Sometimes I do not think I'm with you either."  
He caught hold of my shoulders pinning me against a tree. "Maybe you should not be."  
"Admitting you cannot love me anymore are you?"  
Staring in my eyes he was thinking quickly. "Maybe we should start over."  
"Because I bloody love starting arguments over just too see you get angrier each time."  
"That's not what I meant." He let go of my shoulders, and took a step back. "Start us over. Start everything over. Court you all over. No engagement, no pretense. Even Allan can have his time. I can't keep fighting for you when I do not know for sure about any feelings."  
I blinked at him holding myself close. "You mean this?"  
"Siobhan, I have always cared about you and loved you in my own way. I just think with the expectation everyone had of us marrying I never went through with any other thoughts. I refuse to force you into any feelings."  
I stalked around him carefully. "So a full start over?"  
He watched me walk around him and nodded. "All over."  
"And you would let Allan try to woo me. Are you that sure of your charms?"  
"Do you truly underestimate mine as well?"  
I stopped in front of him again and held out my hand. "So we start over."  
He took my hand in his shaking it and giving it a kiss. "We start over."

* * *

I sighed. "What is it going to take for you lot to sleep?"  
The three boys were curled up against the wall blankets strewn over them as they refused to sleep. Of course Mark as youngest had positioned himself so his head was in my lap, apparently the most comfortable spot while the other two leaned into my sides. We had finally come up with a plan and now everyone was either resting or sleeping.  
Much was snoring on his bed. Will was working on the second box lined with perch. He had made a spare to try first thing in the morning, even though we knew or at least prayed the plan would work. John and Djaq were munching on apples grinning at me as I argued with the boys to sleep. Robin was restringing his bow and Allan was leaning back in his chair cleaning up his cuts from his latest encounter with Gisborne.  
Will caught my eye with a smirk. "You could always sing."  
Mark nodded vigorously even though his eyes were drooping. "Please Siobhan?"  
"I told you all three stories and now you want me to sing? I think not." I glared at Will. "Do you have to encourage them?"  
Allan leaned forward in his chair. "I'll sing with you."  
Everyone fell silent staring at him.  
He looked over his shoulder than back at us all. "What? I can sing. Back home if I really wanted to I probably could have been a bard, I'm just...a bit lazy. After all my singing voice is one of the reasons women find me so desirable."  
I held back a grin. "I don't suppose you're just talking about the executioner's daughter."  
"Very funny. Come on, I've heard you sing only a few times. I like the sound of your voice. I only offered if it made you feel better. Are there any songs we both know?"  
"Know any Irish folk songs?"  
"Do I speak Gaelic?"  
"I'll take that as a no."  
Mark tugged at the hand around George. "Hushabye Mountain?"  
Allan nodded. "I know that one. If you'd like to begin..."  
I grimaced meeting Djaq's smirk. "There will be no making fun of me until tomorrow afternoon earliest." She nodded repositioning herself.  
I noticed the others did the same as well. Will pushed Much to stop snoring and he lazily rolled over to listen. Robin even lay down his bow giving me an encouraging smile.  
I let out a deep breath and looked anywhere but at the faces of those watching me. Instead I focused on Mark's young face and his little hand wrapped in a fist in my skirt.

_"A gentle breeze from hushabye mountain  
Softly blows o'er lullaby bay  
It fills the sails of boats that are waiting  
Waiting to sail your worries away"_

My eyes lifted to meet Allan's. He noded with a small smile taking the next verse.

_"It isn't far to hushabye mountain  
And your boat waits down by the key  
The winds of night so softly are sighing  
Soon they will fly your troubles to sea"_

His voice was low and wonderfully rich. He met my eyes this time and never took them off my face as I joined in the last verse.

_"So close your eyes on hushabye mountain  
Wave goodbye to cares of the day  
And watch your boat from Hushabye Mountain  
Sail far away from lullaby bay"_

Call me crazy, but I wasn't sure if I was breathing as we ended. I reluctantly moved my eyes from Allan's to look at my lot. George has snuggled closer under my arm and was peacefully asleep. Joseph had a tear on his cheek letting me know he had been awake even though he had pretended to be asleep. Mark has stuck a thumb in his mouth and was now perfectly curled and peacefully asleep.  
John gave a subtle cough and reached over to take George from me and lay him on his bed. Will picked up Joseph and let him sleep in his bed. I pulled my knees forward gathering Mark up in my arms. Allan took him from me to lay him in a bed.  
Robin shook his head laughing. "Sometimes you amaze me. You fight, sew, birth babies, know remedies, and sing. What else can you do you have not told us?"  
I smiled. "Sewing and remedies I had to learn from my parents. Plus Robin don't lie, even you know basic remedies. I learned to birth babies because it gets extra coin and singing is just an offset to that. Sining is from my mother and taking care of sick people. It gets people to calm down enough to administer remedies they aren't too thrilled about. Talk about talents. You shoot, sword fight, come up with brilliant plans, are keeping England from falling, and still have time to woo the ladies. Oh, I apologize. You still have time to woo your lady."  
He laughed and tossed me a blanket. "We all have our talents."  
Djaq nodded watching Allan as he came back to sit with us. "Apparently we do."

* * *

I stood in the square watching the exchange slowly. Goddess watch over Daniel, he was being exchanged for the black diamonds.  
Marian has Daniel and had ushered me over to help untie him. At the same time the Sheriff has dumped the contents of the box into a small bag. Well, that was not good. He was smarter. He must have known Robin would find a way to tamper with the box, this was not a good thing.  
"Gisborne all yours!"  
The barn doors smashed open and there was Gisborne. I assumed. To be honest you couldn't tell. He was dressed fully in that metal we had found. The Damascus metal Djaq had been talking about. The metal that repelled all western weapons. Marian and I were each gripping one of Daniel's shoulders watching as he began to fight Robin. I give this to Robin, it was a good thing he fought well with a sword. That was all that was keeping him from being sliced up.  
Marian's eyes widened as Robin grabbed a bucket. "What is he doing?"  
"I believe that's oil and tar. I think he is going to-thought so." I watched as Robin splashed the bucket on Gisborne and shot a flaming arrow at him. You couldn't destroy invincible metal with modern weapons, but fire would always be basic. It might not melt the metal, but it would start burning Gisborne from inside the armor.  
Gisborne hurtled himself into the washing hold, ripping off his armor under the water.  
Robin followed him trying to keep him under the water for as long as he could. "Sheriff, an exchange. Your man for the rocks."  
The Sheriff shook his head. "Do you think I care that much about him Robin Hood? A clue: no."  
Marian shoved Daniel into my arms. "Watching him, he's under your protection now."  
"Marian please-" I groaned as I watched her run toward the Sheriff.  
Daniel looked up at me. "What is she doing Siobhan?"  
"Taking matters into her own hands as always. In other words she is about to do something incredibly stupid."  
I was right as always. When the Sheriff did not relent she held the blacksmith hostage. Oh goodie. The exchange was slow and I could tell it was killing the Sheriff. I watched carefully backing up with Daniel as Robin threw the rocks into an open fire covering them with accelerant. Well, that was a quite a nice miniature explosion.  
Unnecessary as it was, it was still impressive. Even Daniel and I had to word our appreciation. "Wicked."  
I ruffled his hair. "So what do you say we head back to camp so you can be on your way?"

* * *

I gave Daniel and the other boys a hug. "Now you all swear to try to stay out of trouble?"  
Mark frowned. "But we're helping Robin now."  
Robin leaned an elbow on my shoulder nodding to Mark. "That's true, but the best way to help is to stay low. Don't go following anyone, that's my job. Just keep your ears open." He ruffled Mark's head as the little boy fingered his new outlaw tag. Robin's eyes turned up to Daniel's mother, Marie. "Are you sure there's nothing else we can do?"  
Marie shook her head. "You've done so much Robin, there's no way I can ever thank you. I'll take this lot back with me. I should have followed my brother when he took his family out to Clun, but better late then never I suppose. I just held out some hope they would let Sir Edward and Lady Marian go. Been with that family for so long...Promise to keep an eye on her with you Robin?"  
"I will. Don't thank me anyway, Siobhan was the one that kept the boys safe."  
Marie leaned over from the wagon giving me a head. "You I will always be indebted to. Take care of yourself and keep these boys safe. It is what you do best after all."  
I laughed nodding. "I do what I can."

* * *

Night was falling and Much had prepared the turkey I had trapped with little complaint. Behind his back everyone was grinning with the promise of real food.  
Will took the chair next to where I was sitting addressing the whole camp. "So I have news."  
Robin rose a brow at him, but flicked his eyes toward me. "Really, do tell."  
"Siobhan and I are no longer engaged."  
There was a stillness I've never known. I could not hold back the smirk on my face. "Well don't all speak at once."  
Robin chose his words carefully. Apparently he was not entirely sure if he had gotten what he wanted or not. "What exactly did happen? I mean what brought this about?"  
"We had a long time and I decided to be a better person." Will looked to Allan, smiling. "In other words I have decided to give Allan a sporting chance."  
Allan held up his hands. "Hey mate, I didn't say a word. I respect engagements."  
"That's just it. Times are changing and Siobhan and I have agreed that maybe feelings only emerged because that's what had been expected of us. So to be fair we've decided no more engagement. We will start over. With that I decided since Allan does give her looks-"  
"Will, I swear I never meant to over step my grounds. If it appeared I was trying to steal Siobhan from you I am very sorry. Granted I have thought about it a few times, but I never would because we are friends."  
"I no longer mind Allan. I want to be fair. If she develops feelings for you over me it's only fair."  
"You really mean this don't you?"  
"Yes."  
"An honest sporting chance to win her from you?"  
Djaq gave me a look that seemed to be a mixture of shock and amusement. "And you agreed to this? I have a hard time believing that."  
I frowned watching how things were playing out. "Oh, I had agreed. However, I am reconsidering that right now."  
Allan grinned, taking my hand with a smile. "Oh no you don't. I think this could be quite fun."  
Will was grinning holding my other hand. "May the best man-"  
I rose widened eyes to Robin. "Help?"  
He shook his head laughing. "No I find this quite amusing."  
"One day Robin...one day."

* * *

**A/N:  
BIG NOTE: Before anyone yells or makes giggling remarks in many Robin Hood ballads and tales Allan was a bard. I'm not kidding. I got really bored one day and was reading descriptions about all the different versions of each character. I thought that would clarify why Allan was the one singing.  
And we're all going to pretend Hushabye Mountain is an old folk song. I used to sing this to my cousin/niece/daughter (long standing joke) when she was a baby. I still hum it when I need to get her to sleep.  
Anyway.  
_I apologize for late updates. I will explain by copying and pasting the same excuse for my other currently running story (which I suppose is a excuse in itself):  
Sorry this is late. A lot has been going on. Graduation, family, emergency road trips to NY, and concerts. Or my personal favorite my best friend coming over and not allowing me to sleep until he beat me at Wii bowling. Let's just say he finally gave up at 1:30 am. Then refused to go home so we watched a movie. So don't blame me, blame my lifestyle haha_  
-End of Copy and Paste-  
I would like to take the time to apologize to everyone going over my other chapters I will fix any grammar errors at some point, but beside that, I just realized I'm channeling Siobhan in my everyday life. So any spazzy moments are my fault haha  
Some day I hope to wake up and find someone made me a wikipedia page. Some day...  
Anyway on to my thank yous:  
QuietOne364: I just appreciate his sense of humor, and if I can use him in my story I will haha. If I could I would wish for a boyfriend who is a combination of Allan and Will...  
clarissa avila: Okay so it's not soon but look UPDATE!!  
PadfootCc: WOW! I havent' seen you in a while. Funny how that happens. I'm really glad you like this. I was the same way, I saw it on demand and dancing. I have no dancing skills so while it was a pathetic dance it was a happy dance. Hope. That's a nice word haha**


	4. A Lesson in Loss

**Disclaimer: I do not have the false pretense of owning Robin Hood or being affiliated with BBC in any way. Even if I wish I did. **

* * *

I gave Robin sad eyes. "Oh come on. You never let me set off the trap."  
He tried holding back his smile, but failed. It was a smile one saved for a prized pupil who had finally met expectations. "All right, but if you make a mistake you don't get to set off the traps."  
I grinned. "But I get to do it my way."  
"Then I suppose you don't want my bow?"  
I took a knife out of one of my wrist sheaths and flipped it in my hand. "I prefer my own methods, thank you very much."  
"Then I would get ready to throw if I were you."  
The pair we were trapping were running exactly where we wanted. I let out a breath and took aim, carefully watching from the corner of my eye for the perfect moment. There was a marvelous 'thunk' as my knife hit the tree letting loose the waiting net. Laughing I turned to Robin. "I think I like the sound my knife makes over your arrow."  
Robin held out an arm for me. "Shall we?"  
"Oh why thank you sire." I laughed as we slid down the side of the hill coming up to the net.  
The me in the net seemed to be arguing with Much. Why did those voices sound so familiar?  
Will's eyes widened. "Dad? Lukie?"  
Djaq took off her twig hat and wiped off some of the face paint. "You know these people?"  
Will laughed, moving the net aside. "And they know me. This is my father Dan Scarlet. And this is my little brother Lukie."  
Lukie flung himself at his brother grinning. "I'm not little anymore!"  
Will grabbed his brothers face laughing. "My big little brother Lukie."  
My eyes widened. Lukie, my little Lukie, was now about an inch shorter than his brother. "Oh goddess, when did you grow up?"  
Lukie turned at the sound of my voice and grabbed me in a bear hug. "Siobhan!" He placed me down, a wide grin on his face. "Bet you never imagined I'd be this big."  
"Lukie, I still become surprised whenever I see your brother is still alive." I took a step back hands on Lukie's shoulders. "You are a sight for sore eyes though."  
He wiggled his eyebrows. "So am I better looking than my brother?"  
"That is not a question I am going to answer. Especially since I haven't given your father a hug yet." I smiled letting Dan give me a hug. "How have you been?"  
He smiled cupping my face in his hands. "We have been fine. How about you little one? Since Will hasn't appeared to see the rest of his family I assume he's been taking care of you?"  
I rose an eyebrow in said person's general direction. "You could say that."  
Dan turned from me to his eldest son with a mock frown. "Really?"  
Will opened his mouth, but shut it again catching sight of Allan's smirk. "Oh, I suppose you think that's amusing?"  
Allan's smirk grew as he moved away from the tree he had been leaning against. "Yeah, I do actually."  
"Boys!" My tone stopped both of them in their tracks. Their eyes turned to me like a stunned deer looking down an arrow.  
Ever since Will had proposed the 'new start' he and Allan bickered more frequently, but not in a harsh way. They were like little boys looking for an excuse to fight. Robin was under the assumption I prided myself in being the one they fought over. That was entirely untrue...I wasn't the only thing they fought over. To be truthful I was beginning to think Will was just fighting out of habit.  
Djaq thought it was hysterical. She had thanked me for giving her simple entertainment. Of course she rethought it when I calmly turned their fighting over to her. With the belief that since she had been captured before, should she have someone to go into town with her, or simply let her defend herself. She hadn't been too happy with me on that front.  
Dan rose a brow at me. "That is a good trick."  
I grinned as we all made our way back to camp. "I like to think so."  
It was nice to see a bit of calm. Will and Lukie pushing each other, laughing about something.  
I felt a hand take mine from behind me and shook my head. looking down trying to hide my smile. "You never give up do you?"  
Allan appeared at my side smiling. "Not since I was allowed a fair chance."  
"You know, I never said I was fine with the two of you fighting over me like a favorite toy."  
Allan rose my hand, placing a kiss against my knuckles. "You haven't complained thus far."  
I frowned. "I hate it when you make a point."  
We both looked toward the front of the group, watching as Will took off in a huff. Dan and Robin were behind him, but seemed to be giving him a wide birth. Lukie fell back looking as if he knew this was going to happen.  
"Lukie, what happened?"  
"Dad and Will had a row already. I think this might be a new record." At my look he continued running his hands through his hair. "We came back to find Will and bring him back to Scarborough with us. Then he got all pissy like, angry that we were making decisions for him."  
"I know Will can be hard Lukie, but he has a point. He has a life here. Sometimes a life isn't just with your family. Things change."  
Lukie's eyes narrowed as he finally saw my hand in Allan's. I resisted the urge to break from his hold. I was quite proud of myself for that.  
Lukie frowned and turned away. "So I see."  
I groaned, but still held tight to Allan's hand. I refused to let a boy who I'd known all my life, and taken care of for most of it make me feel guilty about my choices. "I always knew it."  
Allan gave me a funny look, but an encouraging squeeze to my hand. "Knew what?"  
"I always knew Lukie would take after his mother. Very good looks and a gift at handing out large amounts of guilt."

* * *

Djaq helped me hang up some herbs to dry taking down ones I had left up last time.  
Djaq helped me make piles on the table, watching Dan from the corner of her eyes. "He is looking at everything with half his eyes. Why is that?"  
I shook my head with a little smile. "He's impressed with the camp, but he doesn't want to be."  
We watched as Dan finally spoke. "This craftsmanship is good."  
Will gave a half nod, seeming unsure of his father's compliment. "See I've got quite a life here."  
"All that says to me is that you could earn a decent living in Scarborough."  
I sat down with Djaq making piles and checking the quality of the herbs. "That would be Dan Scarlet. Backhanded compliments to lure his son in to his own little trap."  
Djaq smiled. "You make it seem like a play."  
"After watching this for nearly my entire life I can almost tell you how the argument will go without knowing for sure what it is about. It is a play, and I don't need to see the script to see where the next act will lead."  
Will threw down the rag he used to clean his ax. "Look dad, I'm an outlaw now. I stand up for what I believe."  
"What and I don't?"  
Will shook his head looking down. "It doesn't matter."  
Dan looked at his eldest son. "Yes it does. Tell me."  
I rested my head on my fists still whispering with Djaq. "Wait for it because Lukie should be making his appearance any second now trying to calm them down."  
Will looked back up at his father, anger seeping into his eyes. "You let the Sheriff cut off your hand!"  
Lukie moved between his father and brother. Pushing Will in the shoulder. "That was to save us."  
Will sighed clapping his brother on the shoulder. "I know, I didn't mean-"  
I tilted my head to meet Djaq's eyes. "And comes the misdirected words of help."  
"Yes you did." Dan took a seat across from Robin, frowning. "Will, if you think we're trying to uproot you that isn't true. We can bring Siobhan with us. She can probably get much better wages out there."  
"This has nothing to do with Siobhan! She has nothing to do with this."  
I winced. That stung a bit.  
I watched Will talk to Robin, but keep his eyes on his father. "Robin, would you tell my father I'm a grown man now and that I make my own decisions?"  
"A real man listens to advice Will." He turned to Dan as Will began to walk away.  
Dan nodded in thanks. "Thanks Robin."  
Robin shook his head. "But he does have a point. You should see the life he has before you take him away. Come with us from Nottingham tomorrow. See what we do."

* * *

I hummed a little tune to myself while re-stitching the last of the herb pouches. Lukie came and sat across from me twirling a stem of belladonna between his fingers.  
I knotted the pouch I had refilled with rosemary and tossed it into my satchel with the other newly adjusted pouches. "Lukie, I hate to burst your bubble, but that's belladonna."  
Lukie gave me a blank look, but stopped twirling the stem.  
John appeared at his side and took a seat, popping a mint leaf into his mouth. "It's a poison."  
The belladonna fell from his grasp and I fought the urge to roll my eyes. Instead I took the small pile and replaced it back in the proper pouch.  
I rose my eyes to properly look at Lukie. "So are you going to tell me what's on your mind or are you just going to sit there all annoying like?"  
"I wanted to apologize for earlier. Will, uh, explained to me what has been going on between the two of you."  
"Ah." I didn't know what else to say. The subject was still pretty bloody uncomfortable for me. Having it brought up by my former fiancee/lover's little brother didn't make matters any better.  
"That would be my cue to leave I suppose." John got up and went to check on Much who was throwing random items into the stew.  
I looked back toward Lukie. "I suppose your dad knows."  
He nodded.  
"How did he take it?"  
Lukie wouldn't meet my eyes. Instead he drew little designs on the table with his finger. "He thinks it furthers his case that Will should leave. He says you prove he doesn't have a life here, and...He said Will could find a decent girl to settle down with in Scarborough."  
I winced. It was bad enough when Will said I didn't matter. Those were words I never had wanted to hear from Dan Scarlet. It was harsh, and made worse knowing it was from a man who had been like a second father to me.  
"Siobhan, he didn't meant it like that. Not really. You know he's just upset."  
I tossed the last group of herbs into their pouch and flung it into my satchel. "I should go."  
Robin watched me get up. "Not staying for supper Siobhan?"  
I shook my head. "No, I have things to do at home. Need to finish doing my herb inventory. Im heading up to the castle in the morning to see if I can sneak in and see Edward."  
He sat up straighter, pausing from looking over his letter. "How is he?"  
"As good as to be expected. Things haven't been going well since Marian's last stunt. He keeps telling her that he is well, but she says he looks awful. So I'll be brining some of everything. See if there's anyone else that needs me while I'm there."  
Robin gave me a meaningful look. "You mean a lot to all of us Siobhan. You're precious in ways I think you forget."  
I smiled. "Thanks Robin, but I do not need reassurance of my worth."  
"I didn't mean-"  
"Sorry, I know you didn't." I rubbed my head. He was just trying to make me feel better. Which meant he knew what Dan had said. It was a nice gesture. "I just need a full night of sleep."  
He got up and walked me out of the camp. "Have you thought anymore about taking that vacation we talked about recently?"  
I smiled. "Everyday. Maybe a couple of days down the road, I'll see."

* * *

"Robin!"  
I walked into the square behind Robin watching as Sarah, Marian's maid in the castle, came forward, running with her daughter in her arms.  
She was crying and noticed I was standing beside Robin. "Oh Siobhan, thank god. I need help. It's Jess."  
I took Jess in my arms and Robin and I looked carefully over her. "What happened Sarah?"  
She stroked her daughter's head. "She's got something. I think it might be the pestilence."  
The others crowed around us. Robin nodded to Will. "Get Djaq, we need as many medical eyes as we can get." He turned to me. "Siobhan?"  
I lifted her up. "I don't see any swelling."  
Dan came forward touching her face and addressing Sarah. "Siobhan is right. There is no swelling that I can see. How long has she been like this?"  
Sarah gripped his arm, eyes all for her little girl. "Since this morning."  
Dan pinched the little girl's cheeks looking for some kind of reaction. "This is not the pestilence. This is something else."  
I looked toward the castle entrance hearing loud voices. "Robin, I think we have a problem."  
Marian was standing on the podium as trumpets called to bring everyone to attention.  
I moved back into the crowd with the others.  
Dan moved the hair away from little Jess's face as I passed her off to Djaq. "Siobhan, I owe you an apology."  
I shook my head. "No you don't."  
"Please, I'm sorry for saying what I did. When Will explained what had happened, I thought it meant he had broken enough ties to come be with his family again. He explained what really happened. I am sorry that my son didn't get his mother's good sense. He inherited his father's bad temper. For that I am sorry."  
I shook my head. "I have already said that it's okay. I should have seen it coming for a while. I am just thankful he wanted to start over."  
He nodded. "So am I. I don't think I ever said it enough Siobhan, but I do care about you. You are the daughter my wife and I never had. You took care of my boys in a way that will stay with them. Will has a short temper, but you helped him find that sometimes a sharp tongue is better for certain situations than physical actions. Even little Lukie. I've never seen a boy listen so carefully to anyone as my boy did to you."  
I laughed, noticing said son was still standing right next to us. "Yes well I still remember him fighting with his brother saying he wanted to be the one to marry me when he grew up."  
Lukie's ears perked up and he flushed. "Please tell me you didn't remember that."  
I smiled. "Unless I'm mistaken you got that scar through your eyebrow form that fight. I was quite flattered."  
He was about to retort but Marian started speaking. "People of Nottingham. On behalf of the Sheriff I make the following announcement. The pestilence has come to Nottingham."  
There were loud voices around us and I went over to look at Jess who was now in Robin's arms.  
Sarah began crying again. "That's what she's got. That's what it is."  
Marian kept talking and I only kept half and ear. Apparently it was only on Pitt Street. There was warning that no one was to pass medicines to those people.  
I narrowed my eyes checking Jess over again. "Oh try and stop me."  
Dan strode forward yelling. "No medicine? There are little ones suffering."  
Those found passing medicine would be punished by death. Oh grand.  
Sarah's crying increased. "So that's it? She's just going to die?"  
Dan shook his head. "No she isn't. That's not what she's got."  
I looked her over. "This isn't the pestilence, of that I am sure."  
Djaq nodded. "It is something else, but I cannot tell right now."  
Robin nodded passing Jess back to her mother. "Sarah, take Jess home. Siobhan and Djaq will come check on her. If they believe this isn't the pestilence than it isn't. We will be there soon."  
I shook my head as Marian finished her little speech. She was only doing this for her father. There could be no other explanation for her to do this. I gave a sigh tying my hair back. If I was going to stay behind to look at these people, best not to be recognized by my hair. I grabbed my hair wrapping from my bag covering the top of my head and letting my hair flow freely from the back. With subtle clothing I blended back into the crowd moving after Robin, watching as the Sheriff told everyone to simply ignore those on Pitt Street.  
Will came up behind me with Lukie. "Robin, we need to do something. He's condemning the whole street to death!"  
Dan's voice called out as the Sheriff went to get off the stage. "Sheriff you cannot do this!"  
Robin lurched forward trying to get Dan's attention, but he wouldn't listen. Much had to pull Robin back. It wouldn't do well to reveal Robin was waiting in the crowd.  
Will moved us into the covering of a side market.  
I took hold of Lukie's shoulders as he tried to move past his brother. "Stop it."  
He looked to argue, but Will shook his head. "Just stay here Lukie. Siobhan, watch him. I want to see if I can get close enough to get him to be quiet."  
I nodded watching as he moved forward. I took Lukie as far as the fabric stall, thinking that was close enough to keep him appeased.  
We all watched as Dan continued. "I've just had a look at a little girl you've condemned. This is not the pestilence. I've seen the pestilence before in Scarborough. These people must have food and water and medicines!"  
The Sheriff was loosing his composure quickly. "I said shut up!"  
"I will not shut up." He continued walking up through the crowd. At this rate Will wasn't going to reach him before the Sheriff locked him up. "I shut up once before for you Sheriff. It cost me my wife, my hand, and the respect of my son. So I am not shutting up anymore. Now why are you saying this is the pestilence when-"  
He was cut off. Literally. A guard appeared behind him shoving a sword though the middle of Dan Scarlet.  
Lukie leapt forward, but I pressed all my weight against him. I managed to force him back. How I did so I wasn't sure. I couldn't move my eyes from the sight and had my arms wrapped around Lukie trying to hold him still. I looked for Will and saw him fighting with John trying to move forward. Robin, Djaq, and Much were at my side eyes wide.  
As the Sheriff left the stage Robin ran toward Will, Much close behind  
I turned to Djaq. "Djaq, get Will. You can get him to calm."  
She paused for a moment unsure, then went after him.  
Lukie was shaking and buried his face in my neck. "No. No. No."  
I stroked the side of his head shushing him. Watching as barricades suddenly appeared carried by the Sheriff's guard. They were going to block us off.  
Will saw me with Lukie and ran toward us. He carefully peeled his brother off of me holding him tightly. His eyes found me and he reached out for my hand looking lost and angry. I led the group of us to sit down on a bench. Will let go of me now focusing on his brother.  
I left them and ran toward Robin. "Robin, the barricades."  
He nodded. "I think Dan was right. There's no pestilence. That's why they killed him."  
Much looked at him wide eyed. "You think?"  
I nodded. "I agree. I don't know what it is, but I'm almost positive it's not the pestilence."  
Robin looked me over. "We're going to Pitt Street. Will you help?"  
"You're religion teaches you to help others. So does mine. I'm not going to watch as the Sheriff let's some unknown illness kill off these people."  
He nodded. "Thank you my friend."  
Allan pointed around. "What about the letter?"  
Robin's eyes moved fast. "Roger..."  
"Robin, I'll go get the letter to Roger. I'll find a way to get back in."  
Robin nodded. "Good idea."  
I touched Allan's hand and he went to leave. "Allan, on your way back, stop at my cottage. If you can bring any medicines you can find."  
He nodded and left hurrying as the barricades turned out way.  
I turned running along side of Djaq as we tried to beat the barricades closing in. We found Sarah and hurried to her house. Djaq and I took positions on either side of Jess while Robin asked Sarah to fill him in on what she knew.  
Whatever this was it had infected more than half the houses. It may not have been the pestilence but it was pretty damn widespread.  
Robin nodded his head to me as he went toward the door. I looked to Djaq and she simply nodded. She didn't need my help on this matter so I let Sarah sit beside her daughter again.  
"What is it Robin."  
I crossed his arms. "I sent Much and John to start setting up beds and linens. Also to find any medicines they can. Do you have any of your herbs on you?"  
I nodded. "I still have everything I brought with me to try on Edward. Djaq and I were just looking through to see what we could make. I asked Allan to stop at my cottage and grab anything that might be there, but I don't know how long it will take him to deliver the letter. If I can find away to get out, I can see what I can grab from right outside the walls, maybe make it back to the cottage. Getting back inside the barricade just means hopping out of a window I would think."  
Robin seemed to think about this idea. In the end he nodded and led me outside to check on Will and Lukie. I stood back watching as Lukie argued with him, face still red and tears in his eyes. I hated seeing him like this.  
Will stood up speaking low to Robin, out of earshot of his brother. "I want to take him home. Back to Scarborough, to our Auntie Annie. If you need us here-"  
"No take him. And when you return I will have your father." He paused seeming to think. "Siobhan will go with you too. Only to get her on the other side of the walls. She knows where to find any helpful herbs. Stay at her house for the night. Eat, rest up before you go. I don't think your brother will be able to get far tonight."  
Will thought about it for a minute and nodded. For some reason it looked as though he was mentally adjusting some plan. "Thank you."  
Robin and I went back in the house. I needed to get a list from Djaq of anything I might be able to find that could help better. It would be a long day.  
Of course it would be even longer until we found out what was wrong with all these people. What kind of new illness had made itself known that could settle this quickly, but spread to one lone street?  
I knew the answer to that. An illness we knew nothing about. One that could have symptoms we wouldn't catch until it was too late.

* * *

Djaq and I didn't make a list. All that we knew was that I needed to grab anything I could find. Will, Lukie, and I crawled over the roofs of houses making our way slowly over to the stone walls. One house left to jump. We jumped it and Lukie slipped. Will and I each grabbed one of his arms, pulling him up.  
I couldn't help but smiled and looked toward Will. "Just like old times."  
"Just like old times." He smiled, but it was wrong. It was not a joking smile, it was a smile of someone reaching their limit. Looking at his face, I was pretty sure that Will needed the vacation more than I did.  
We took out running jump finally making it over and stood on the stone of one of the castle walls. No one was guarding this spot, mainly because a good portion of the guard who weren't protecting the most important parts of the castle.  
Will adjusted the rope he had strung through the pulley normally used for lifting crates that were brought into town.  
He looked to Lukie. "I'll go down first. Make sure it's safe. I can do it far better than you."  
Lukie grabbed the rope from his brother. "Why do you always do that? I'm not a baby."  
I shook my head sitting behind both of them adjusting my boots. I wasn't going to try climbing down with straw and small rocks lodged in my shoes cutting my feet.  
Something changed in Will's stance as he watched his brother climb down. I was almost positive he forgot I was still here. "I loved you Luke.  
I heard Lukie call back up. "See? Your turn."  
Will pulled the rope up with uncanny speed. "Run away Lukie. Run back to Scarborough."  
I jumped up. "Will! What do you think you're doing."  
He stalked toward me. "This place is about to turn to hell."  
His ax came out of nowhere. It was the last thing I saw before the world turned black.

* * *

I groaned rolling over. "Ye gods." I clutched my head and let out a moan. Oh that had hurt.  
I sat up looking around me. Where was I?  
Images flashed through my mind and I suddenly remembered where I was.  
Roof. Castle top. Sickness. Dan was dead. We were leaving. Lukie. Will. _WILL_!  
I stood up and jumped back onto one of the roofs. I needed to get back to Robin. Will was about to do something stupid unless I was very much mistaken.  
I mumbled to myself swinging into one of the windows of the houses heading down the stairs. I was going to kill Will when I next saw him. Never, ever, in the either time we had known each other had he ever laid a hand on me. Yes when we were younger we had wrestled once or twice, but it was just a little kid fight, no punching. He has knocked me out with his ax this time.  
I wanted to say it was because of grief, but there had been so much more than grief in his eyes. I knew where we stood now. Everything we might have had before? It was over.  
I had stood by as he broke my heart and took him back. Mental hurt was terrible, and it hurt most. Physical hurt was something I never tolerated. Yes I had put up with Tobias, but I couldn't mess up my position. I wasn't going to give up my job and any hope of helping Tobias, just because he had threatened me. I was still trying to find a way to deal with that.  
But Will? Will knocking me out cold was something I would not tolerate. I was not scared of him, and I would be damned if I _ever_ let him touch me like that again.  
I walked past the beds seeing the back of Robin's head. "Robin."  
He didn't turn around, but continued looking at his patient. "Siobhan, you're back."  
"Yes, but Robin-"  
He held up a hand still not turning around. His eyes were on Djaq and John, who were staring just as intently back. "Before you say anything. Belladonna. Could it work?"  
I freed my mind concentrating on his question. "Belladonna. Leaves and berries toxic...used against certain poisoning because of mushrooms. Yes. Yes I think it could work, how did you come up with that. Djaq there's a whole pouch full in my bag. If we make a paste out of it, put it on lips and tongue, yes I think it might work."  
Djaq ran inside without looking at me. Shucks I wanted to know how badly I was hurt.  
Robin finally turned. "Now what did you-" He leapt forward. "What did this to you?"  
I punched his arm as he touched my face. "Don't do that!" I groaned sinking onto the foot of Jess' bed. "I was trying to tell you. We have a problem."  
"How did you get back so-" He stopped watching as Djaq came back outside with a grinding bowl still in her hands.  
I swept my hair forward. The last thing I needed was to distract anyone. We needed everyone's concentration on this issue right now.  
Djaq looked at Sarah carefully. "We think we might have found a cure."  
Sarah looked at Djaq's hands. "What is that?"  
"It's a hunch. But it could kill her."  
Sarah looked around wildly. "Who's hunch?"  
John stepped forward. "Mine."  
Sarah looked for confirmation. "Siobhan?"  
I nodded. "I agree with John. I think it could work."  
John sat beside her. "Trust me. Let me do this."  
Sarah nodded trying to compose herself. "She's going anyway. Just try it. Please, try it."  
John dabbed the near liquid paste on her lips and plopped some on her tongue. Jess turned her head and lay still.  
"Jess! No!" Sarah leaned forward clutching her daughter. Her sobs slowed and she grabbed John. "Jess? It's working!"  
Jess' eyes fluttered opened and she began blinking the world around her back into focus.  
Robin nodded smiling as we moved together. "Good, but we need to stop Josef before he does anymore damaged." He turned to me giving a hurried explanation. "The Sheriff found a scientist to come up with a poison. He posed as the Night Watchman and gave everyone the poisoned food. He was in here, but went through the barricade when we figured out who he was." He turned back to speak to all of us as a whole. "We have to find a way into the castle."  
Marian looked confused. "Well how did Will get in?"  
"Will's in the castle?" Robin went stiff as he turned to me. "How did-"  
I moved my hair out of my face letting him look at what I assume must be one hell of a bruise. It wasn't swollen as far as I could tell and I couldn't feel any dry blood, so that left a massive bruise as the last option. "And where do you think I got this? I might not be very graceful, but I've never walked into the side an an ax." I let that settle in. "My best guess is he's going to kill the Sheriff. I'm sure this Josef left some of the poison, probably in the alchemy room."  
Marian looked at the lot of us confused. "Doesn't he know if the Sheriff dies an unnatural-"  
Robin nodded standing up straight. "he knows, but it won't stop him. That man the Sheriff had killed this morning?"  
Marian's eyes widened. "Dan?"  
Robin nodded. "Yes." He walked over to me wincing looking at the side of my face. "We need to get into the castle. Siobhan, if you make the cure here."  
I narrowed my eyes. "I can show Sarah, she can be trusted. I am not waiting here."  
Robin looked to argue, but thought better of it. He turned to Djaq. "You and Siobhan show Sarah quickly. I think I know a way in."

* * *

I threw back my hood once inside the castle. My arms flung my cloak back leaving my hands open. I flexed my fingers a few times reminding myself when we find Will I was not allowed to harm him...right away.  
Allan curse and lifted my chin to better inspect me while the others armed themselves up. He had slid to our side as we traveled up to the castle with the 'body' Mister Josef had wanted to inspect. I had to give it to Robin, that was one of his fastest plans.  
Allan's eyes were wide still inspecting my face. "What the hell hit you?"  
"An ax."  
"An-" He stilled, his entire body rigid. His nostrils flared and he tried his best to control his voice. He turned looking at Robin. "Will is in here?"  
Robin nodded. "He wants to kill the Sheriff. He hired a poisoner, we found a cure. We need to stop him before he gets to the Sheriff." He moved to shut the door behind up and clapped Allan on the shoulder. "Did you find Roger?"  
Allan nodded. "Yeah, message delivered."  
Robin nodded. "Good work."  
Allan's eyes turned back to me. Uh oh. Now the angry eyes were directed toward me. "You let him do this to you?"  
I shoved Allan back. "Let him? I didn't see it coming Allan! Do you think I would allow someone to do this to me?"  
Robin turned toward us. "The two of you can argue after. We need to find Will. Now. John, Allan, go down that way. Siobhan, go with them. Much, Djaq down there."  
Much looked confused. "What if he won't come?"  
"Make him."  
"What if he wont."  
He paused meeting my eyes. "Whatever it takes."  
Everyone was silent.  
Much looked between us confused. "Whatever it takes?"  
"Whatever it takes."  
"What kill him? Kill one of our own?"  
"Well, let's hope we have a choice."  
I moved my eyes from Robin walking away with John and Allan.  
Allan grabbed my hand, moving in front of me. "Siobhan, I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"  
I touched the side of his face closing my eyes. "I know. I'm sorry I yelled."  
His free hand fell to his sword.  
I shook my head moving my hand from his face to his sword hand. "No. We aren't going to kill him. There are other ways beside what Robin thinks." I looked toward John. "Just putting this out there. If we find him first I get to have the first punch."

* * *

We came to a halt seeing Robin and Will circling each other. "Where is Djaq? Will tell me where she is. Don't do this."  
Much moved forward. "What have you done with Djaq?"  
Funny, I don't know if they had done it purposely or not, but I was out of Will's view line.  
"I stood up to the Sheriff. Something we all should have done a while ago." He held up the bottle in his hand. "Bottle of Justice."  
Robin shook his head watching Will. "And what about Siobhan?"  
I moved slowly from behind John watching Will's face as he answered. "Knock on the head. She'll be fine. She tried stopping me."  
I pushed past Much. "Oh she'll be fine will she?"  
Will looked taken aback at seeing me there. Bastard probably thought I was still where he left me. He winced looking at the side of my face. "I had to. You were trying to stop me. I needed to do this. You shouldn't have interfered."  
Robin grabbed hold of me, seeming to realize I was moment's again from throwing myself at Will. He pushed me into John's waiting arms. He must have seen the look on Allan's face. Allan probably would have let me go and join me. John would make sure I wouldn't move.  
Robin considered Will for a moment. "And if all of Nottingham dies?"  
"That's not my fault."  
Robin nodded and rushed Will. He grabbed the 'bottle of justice' from Will's hand and put to his lips seeming to drink deeply form it.  
A shout came form Much as he rushed forward to help Robin. I stood in shock, based on John's loosed grip I would say he was just as surprised.  
Will's eyes narrowed at Robin who had now slumped against the wall clutching the bottle of poison and coughing. "I'm not a fool Robin. Don't treat me as one. The cork is still in the bottle. Nothing you can say is going to change my mind. The Sheriff dies."  
Robin looked up frowning. Well, I would say this his acting was getting better. I saw where the cork was still in the bottle. At least Robin hadn't done something stupid. That was the last thing we needed right now.  
Will shook his head. "You just don't understand Robin."  
Those words hit me as hard as his ax had a few hours ago. I lost the little composure I had left. Pushing Will back, I forced him to look at me. "Stop this nonsense. What is happening to you? You abandon your brother, knock me out, disobey Robin, and lock Djaq up! Think Will, I knew your father too. He never would have wanted you to become a murderer."  
His eyes flashed. "Don't you dare talk about what my father would or would not have wanted. He would never want the innocent to die. We saved Pitt Street. There are no innocent left to save. Only the evil ones lay dying now."  
Allan grabbed Will's arm and motioned out the window. I thought he was going to throw him out the window,"Have you forgotten about everything we learned? The Sheriff dies, everyone dies. The Black Knights will burn all of Nottingham to the ground. No Locksley, no Clun, nothing will be left for us to take care of. We need to bide our time and come up with a real plan. If you don't get Djaq, you will be the one condemning all of Nottingham to death. All the lived we just saved will face a far more painful and vicious death. Do you want that on your head?"  
"Allan, he killed my father in front of me and my brother. He killed your brother. He's had a hand in all of our miseries. Tell me you don't want him to die like this. We save the innocent, not the wicked."  
I moved forward slowly. "I lost both my parents too Will. They were just as innocent as yours. I know better. If we want to hurt the Sheriff we have to wait. I want my justice just as much as you do. I want him to suffer." I made a choice in a moment. "You want to save the innocent? Well I suppose it makes this judgement time."  
Robin didn't have the chance to react as I grabbed the bottle from his slack grasp, dancing out of everyone's reach. I flung the cork at Will's chest and raised the bottle in his direction for a toast. A swallowed a good portion of the draft and felt the burn all the way down. The bottle slipped from my fingers and shattered on the stone floor. So it was a bit more potent than I had originally thought. Or possibly I had taken more than I should have in it's basic form. I sank to my knees coughing as fire ran through my stomach. There was collective yelling around me, but I was more focused on keeping myself balanced.  
Robin, Allan, and Will ran towards me, John and Much too stunned to move.  
Will's eyes were wide as he raised my face in his hands. "Siobhan? Siobhan, Why-don't do this."  
Allan's face contorted in rage. He pulled Will to his feet, first wrapped around the cloth of his shirt and slammed him into a pillar. "Do not let her die. Will, if you do not go get Djaq right now I will kill you without a second thought."  
Will looked to me eyes growing wider every moment.  
I shifted myself backward to lea against a pillar for support, clutching my stomach. "It's your Judgment Day Will. It is all up to you. We all live another day or you take your chances with the Black Knights, in which case I'll be glad to have already died. Do you want to watch all the villagers burned to death, or worse? I may not be most innocent, but I think-" I shut my eyes tight giving out a cry at the pain that just shit through my stomach.  
Will stumbled running down the hall with Much and John close behind.  
Allan came back to sit by my side and pulled me onto his lap. I was about to argue until I realized what he was doing. His hands were rubbing my arms making sure the blood would not slow. Apparently he had seen some of the work Djaq and I started on the patients. It was a chance, either the poison would slow the blood, or keeping the blood flowing would spread it faster. Since the rubbing had mainly helped our patients the rubbing was fine to me. Plus I wasn't going to argue, because he was warm, I had no plan to move.  
I started to close my eyes when Robin leaned forward. "Siobhan, don't you dare even think about shutting your eyes." He grabbed my chin and pinched my cheeks waking me up. "Are you quite proud of yourself?"  
I moved closer into Allan's arms trying to figure that out for myself. "Did Will go get Djaq?"  
"Yes."  
"Then, yes, I am proud of myself."  
Robin shook his head moving his eyes to Allan. "Make sure Djaq gives Siobhan the cure first. Just don't let them linger. The Sheriff has had it a bit longer, and I like to think Siobhan is more of a fighter. We can't let Nottingham fall." He touched my head forehead lightly and nodded to Allan before heading off toward the Sheriff's room.  
Allan tilted my face up to look at him. One arm held me up while the hand of the other rubbed small circles in my cheeks and temples hoping to keep my eyes open. "Why?"  
"Why what?"  
"Why did you do that?"  
I gave a light sigh. "I don't want the whole of Nottingham to die Allan. I know it was a chance, and honestly I wasn't sure if it would work anyway. Well, I was not entirely sure. I figured if it didn't work I'd rather die of poison than an arrow through my heart or what else the Black Knights would do."  
"What do you mean you didn't think it would work?"  
"Will doesn't love me anymore. Well, no, he loves me. He just isn't in love with me. Even you can see that Allan. I lost him, but it doesn't bother me anymore. He loves me as a sister, or something similar to that. He cannot love me any more than that." I closed my eyes, moving my face closer into his chest.  
"Don't...don't close your eyes." Allan grabbed my chin, but his touch to move me was hesitant as if unsure if moving me would be best. "You are not allowed to sleep. We cannot afford that."  
I gave a little smile. "I can't help it. You're so warm."  
Allan stared down at me and I could tell he was uneasy. "Siobhan..."  
I lowered my eyes, sorry I had said that. "Can you help me up?"  
Allan seemed to debate my request for a moment before he took me off his lap. He stood and leaned over to help me back up. He slid my arms over his should for support as he straightened me up. "Siobhan, are you sure you are okay to st-"  
He gripped my waist as my knees buckled. "I'm not being funny, but maybe you shouldn't try to stand just yet." Balancing me against him, Allan lifted me into his arms, cradling me close.  
My head lolled against his shoulder. "I'm not being funny, but are they close yet?" I cracked a smile using his catchphrase. I started closing my eyes again, I was so tired.  
"I can hear them. Siobhan? Don't do this. Please..." I felt him kneel as he placed me on the floor. His hands rubbed along my arms and up my neck. "Please love, don't give up."  
"I'm sorry Allan. I-"  
His thumb pressed against my lips. "Do not say it. You are going to be okay. Just open your eyes." His other hand grabbed my own, squeezing it. His voice turned to a whisper, sounding more like he was praying than addressing me. "Don't leave. Siobhan stay with me. I'll do anything. Stay with me."  
I could hear footsteps and struggled to open my eyes. I blinked my world into view seeing Allan and Djaq looming over me.  
"She does not look good, but at least she is conscience." Djaq had opened my mouth spreading the belladonna around my lips and tongue.  
Will came over as Djaq watched my reaction, but she put a hand to his chest shoving the cure into his hands. "Go to Robin. Now."  
Will looked at me, but Much pulled him along. I swear I thought I heard him whisper an apology.  
Djaq brushed my forehead sweeping my hair out of the way. "You just love to make a point do you not?" She smiled looking up at John. "Can you lift her?"  
Allan shook his head and scooped me up. "I can carry her."  
John looked to argue, but nodded after a pause. He turned to follow the others.  
Djaq stood up carefully looking me over. "How do you already have color back in your face?"  
I smiled, but my nose wrinkled at the bitter taste in my mouth. "Allan apparently didn't want me dying before you got back here."  
Allan glared at me, but kept silent. Apparently it was too early to joke about my demise.  
Djaq led the way to the room, but Allan lagged behind positioning himself closer to the staircase. It doubled as making sure he could get out with me quickly and making sure the Sheriff didn't get a glance of me.  
I looked up at his face which was still pale and anxious. My chest tightening, but not from the poison. I had honestly scared him. That's why he wouldn't let anyone else hold me. He wanted to be the one to watch over me.  
I pressed my face against his neck releasing a sigh. "Allan, I'm sorry."  
His grip had tightened at my movement, but relaxed at my words. His voice was low and soothing. "What do you have to be sorry for?"  
I lifted my head back up to meet his eyes. Their color had softened. I did love his eyes. They reminded me of my own, but his were much warmer and richer in color. A bit like my mother's eyes, but a light almost crystal like color. "I'm sorry I scared you."  
Allan gave me a little smile. "Ah, sorry for scaring me half to death. Promise to never do that ever again and all is forgiven."  
That was when it finally hit me. Allan still loved me. After a year I thought it would have faded. Yes we joked and flirted, but it had always been in good fun. Even the courting, that had been in good, at least that was how he had acting about it. It had been over a year since he told me he loved me. Things had become funny, and after I had finally forgiven both him and Will for leaving that time we had gotten better. Yes we had gotten closer, but I never thought he would still care in the same way. Apparently I needed to start being more observant again.  
Something must have shown on my face, because Allan's smile grew slightly, but sadness crept into it. It was as if he read my mind. "I never said I was giving up on you."  
"But, I hurt you. I was terrible."  
"Love isn't always pleasure, there is a lot of pain."  
I opened my mouth to say something, to say anything. But it was at that moment the others ran out of the room.  
Allan went first down the stairs, brushing a kiss across my forehead.

* * *

I sat on a log waiting for the others. The others had gone to check on Pitt Street, to make sure everything had turned out okay.  
Apparently I had passed out in Allan's arms on the way back to camp. I was fine now, but apparently there was a vigil at my side until I woke this morning. No one knew how I was going to react since no one was quite sure how much of the poison I had ingested.  
I love how Djaq sold the others out. Robin had pulled Will outside the camp by his ear and had a long talk with him. Much had been running his mouth off to Lukie telling him how his brother had knocked me out. Lukie had apparently jumped his brother and Allan joined it. It took Much, Robin, and John to pull the three away from each other.  
Lukie was pissed that his brother would ever hurt me, and Allan had been biding his time until he thought he could get away with throwing a punch at Will without someone stopping him.  
When I had been able to sit up I forced the three of them to sit at the table together and apologize. None of them would look at me, but stated they wouldn't do it again.  
Of course, Robin had sat me down and made me promise the same thing.  
Now, we were waiting for Will's special unveiling. Lukie took his placed behind me hands on my shoulders. I lifted my head to see him, squeezing his hand and giving him a smile.  
Much led the way giving me a confused look. "I thought Will was making a memorial for Dan?"  
"Will hurried down from his spot up on the hill to stand next to his brother. "Any second."  
Much looked around. "Uh, where are we looking?"  
Lukie pointed at the rock form in front of us. "Waiting for the light."  
"Oh!" I straightened up watching as light went through the tablet Will had been working on and started forming an image of the rock face. Dan's face smiled at us from the rock. I looked at everyone's faces, glad to know we all shared the same amazed expression.  
I looked to Will giving his hand a squeeze. "This is your finest work. Your dad would be proud."  
He returned my squeeze with a smile. "I like to think so."  
I moved from the log ruffling Lukie's hair. "So are you going to give me a hug before you run off to Scarborough?"  
Lukie gave me a hug and swung me around. "Breaking your heart am I?"  
I smacked his shoulder making him put me back down, starting to laugh. "Always."  
Robin came up behind me. "Lukie, stay another night here, then we'll take you back to Scarborough."  
Will shook his head gripping Lukie's shoulders. "No Robin. If you don't mind I want to take him back myself tomorrow. I want to talk to my aunt, be the one to tell her."  
Everyone was talking laughing as they shared stories from their childhood. I tapped Robin on the shoulder inclining my head slightly away from the group.  
He gave me a confused look, but followed me over. "Yes?"  
"Remember when you said I should take a little vacation?"  
"I figured you'd take it now. Where are you going?"  
I bit the inside of my cheek. "Robin, I don't want anyone to be able to find me. I mean that."  
Robin nodded resting his chin on the top of his bow. "I understand that Siobhan, but if something happens I want to be able to find you. I promise I'll be the only one who knows where you are."  
I nodded. "I'm going to visit Matilda. Rosa is about a week away from having her baby and Matilda sent a letter asking me to come visit maybe lend a hand. Her cottage is still in the same place, but please Robin. Only if you really need me."  
He nodded. "You need to go to the castle?"  
I smiled. "I can handle it without a guard. Plus I can stop by the port and pick up anything that's needed for the castle. I've done it before. I go down to the port with Rafael's wife, check the in port of fabrics and a few other items."  
"Are you coming back to say goodbye tonight?"  
I shook my head. "My goodbyes are now. I don't think dragging it out would be a good idea."  
He nodded walking back over with me. "Lads, Siobhan has a little bit of news."  
I frowned. "It's not news. I'm going away for a little while. Two week trip, so try not to ruin your clothes for a while. I'll leave it outside of the camp tomorrow. I'm leaving first thing in the morning. So, yes, that's it."  
I walked over to Will and Lukie. "Lukie, could I...give a blessing? I didn't get to last time. I think you're going to need someone watching out for you while we're not around."  
Djaq grinned at me. "I was thinking the same thing. You do not mind do you?"  
Lukie smiled and shook his head. "Not at all. I need all the help I can get."  
I smiled making room for Djaq to stand next to me. We mirrored positions, each with a hand on the sides of Lukie's head.  
I heard Djaq's low tones speaking in rapid Arabic.  
I met Will's eyes over his brother's head. This was a goodbye not just for Lukie, but for us as well. I knew exactly which blessing to give him, both of them really. My mother gave this blessing to every friend who moved away or left after a long visit.  
_"May you have  
Walls for the wind  
And a roof for the rain,  
And drinks bedside the fire  
Laughter to cheer you  
And those you love near you,  
And all that your heart may desire"_  
I thanked the goddess I was able to say the last two lines without crying or letting my voice shake. I didn't think I would be able to.  
I took Lukie's head in my hands pulling it down to kiss his forehead. I shook my head a bit as he stood up straight. "You know, it loses some of it's meaning when you have to bend that far over."  
He grinned giving Djaq a hug and squeezing the life out of me. "I don't care it still means a lot." He brought his lips close to my ear. "I don't care what Will says. You'll always be my sister, I think I could have loved you a lot more than he could." He leaned back giving me a wink. "Just be happy. That's my wish for you. And if you ever decide you want to settle down you know where to find me."  
I hugged him back remembering how much I missed him. He was a pain, but sweet. "Promise to visit around the holidays?"  
He grinned. "Only if I get presents."  
"Always the same Lukie." I marched him over to his brother as the others headed back inside the camp for lunch. "I believe this belongs to you."  
Will smiled pushing his brother toward the camp, but took my hand. He noticed my flinch and winced. "Siobhan, I want to properly apologize."  
I shook my head holding up a hand. "Will before you go into a speech, I want to stop you. I know the words, the melody is quite familiar, because if nothing else your apologies have always been a song playing in my mind."  
"That was quite eloquent."  
"Yes, well my speech is one long in coming." I gave his hand a squeeze then crossed my arms. "I need to say this so please, let me get it all out before you say anything. We can't do this anymore, it will kill any chance of us remaining friends." When he didn't argue I went on, though I admit I lost some heart. Not one word of argument. "I promised a while ago if you hurt me again it would be over indefinitely. I stand by that. I've stood down while Tobias physically hurt me, because if I fought back it could compromise my value and just cause more problems. But I refuse to back down to you. You've broken my heart and knocked me out cold. You have never, even at your angriest ever laid a hand on me. You can't love me."  
"Be fair-"  
I held up my hand. "You will let me finish. You love me like a sister. You do not love me like a lover anymore, don't deny it. I shouldn't have said you can't love me, because you do. You love me to the best of your abilities and that is like a sister. You love me the best you can. You just can't love me the way I need to be loved."  
"Can Allan?"  
He was serious, his eyes were clear and he was allowing me to go. Part of me was glad he wouldn't fight too much. Part of me was enraged he wouldn't put up the fight.  
"I don't know.  
He watched my face with a smile. "This is why you are going away isn't it."  
I frowned. "I'm going to visit a friend. She's due to give birth in a week."  
Will shook his head. "I didn't mean to sound like that. I just meant you need to be away for everyone, don't you?"  
"I need to sort out my life."  
Will lifted my chin with a finger. "I want to see you happy. You're right. I can't love you the way you need to be, but I want to do my best to make sure you are happy. Anything you need."  
"Let me go."  
And then I saw it. The one thing I'd been waiting to see. I saw the pain in his eyes. He knew this was what I needed, what he had to do. In his own way he needed this as badly as I did. He just didn't know it yet. It was something we both had to do.  
He kissed my forehead goodbye.  
For so long we knew we'd be there for each other, but I don't think we ever thought this was the way we'd be there. But there was something still there. We would always be there for one another. He was my first love, and nothing would change that.  
He pulled back looking into my eyes. "Part of my heart will always be yours, I want you to know that. Of that I am sincere."  
"And you have part of mine, but you always knew that. Thank you Will."  
"Siobhan...I hope your trip is a good one."  
"I do too. More than anything."  
"You deserve this trip. Take care of yourself."  
"That's what I've been trying to do all along."

* * *

Bless Marian for her distractions. Thanks to her I made my plea with the Sheriff without running into Tobias or Gisborne. It was the little victories that got me through each day.  
On the subject of the Sheriff he seemed to be in decent humor considering his plan had just failed. But I suppose even he couldn't be in terrible spirits after being saved from death. We shared that little victory in common.  
Now I sat on my rock staring up at the sky. If I ever disappeared without wanted Will to find me this is where I came. He knew about the Willow, because we shared that, but he never knew about my grotto. I came here to get away and this was one stop I always made when I went out of town. I would spend the night here and leave first thing in the morning.  
Yes, I had found the location of my grotto, years after I had first run away here. My mother had been right. The fey always watched over and protected our people. Once again, while wandering in the woods I had been led here, but the second time was at sunrise. It was beautiful, but my favorite time in the grotto would always be the dwindling twilight.  
The love was simple. The cool breeze would cause tiny ripples in the water, ripples that grew out beyond where I could see once I slipped a toe in the water. I smiled leaning my head back in the full light of the moon. She was full tonight and lit the area around me with a soothing silver light.  
This is what I would give up love for. The chance to stay here forever would be enough for me.  
I took a deep breath. Rain was on it's way, not until mid afternoon I would say, so I was safe for the night. I would have to leave a little earlier if I wanted to get to Matilda's before the rain began. I loved the rain, but traveling long distances in it? Not so much.  
There was a noise near the trees and I turned around startled.  
"Siobhan."  
I blinked slowly. Years ago I left this place with only one phrase in my head. No one found me.  
Yet here I was in the same exact spot staring into the trees. Someone had found me.  
I shook my head. "I should have known it would be you."

* * *

**  
A/N:  
Geee...a mild cliffhanger. I say mild just because she's not currently drowning or anything like that...for now.  
How long has it been since I've done one of those?  
OOOH OOOH Side note fun news: I've always joked about having my own wikipedia page. Apparent there is a site that has a wikipage for every author on this site. I felt the need to share this with everyone. Anyway here is the link, you should check to se if you have one as well: /index.php/JustAnotherFallen  
Cowgirl: Now where's the fun in telling everyone the ending. You should know me by now. Twists and turns are my favorite past time. I like sticking with the story lines for the most part. If I changed the whole thing, the fun of twisting and turning the story would lose all the fun.  
QuietOne364: I'm quite glad you did.  
**


	5. A Promise and Betrayal

**Disclaimer: I have no, nor to I intend to imply, any affiliation with BBC's version of Robin Hood. Get it? Got it? Good.**

* * *

"I should have known it would be you."  
He smiled body leaned against a tree, with an odd expression on this face. "You didn't say goodbye."  
I folded my knees closer to my body, watching as he sat on the ledge of the land. It was a beautiful place, my grotto. The ledge was a mini cliff allowing a person to simply jump into the water instead of wading in. You simply would jump straight in and wouldn't have to worry about rocks of hitting land. Quiet too, just the sounds of crickets and the water lapping against the rocks...until now.  
I nodded my head, cheek pressed against the top of my knee. "I didn't."  
"Not being funny, but usually when someone admits they love you, you are supposed to at least say goodbye, if nothing else."  
I bit my lip, watching as Allan studied my face. "I have heard one too many promises of love. I've grown rather weary of love." Weary and scared, but I wouldn't admit that to him.  
"Would you at least come sit over here so we can properly talk?"  
I considered the request and slowly unfolded myself. I stood, carefully hopping from one giant rock to the next. They were distanced a good deal apart, but it was always the last jump that took me longest. On the last rock I backed myself as far back as I could before throwing myself to shore. Allan's arm caught me about the waist keeping me upright and balanced.  
I smiled shaking my head. Mainly because anything else would have sent me crying, or clutching to him and never letting go. I refused to do that. I would get my vacation to sort out my life, I wouldn't succumb to my own vulnerabilities.  
I looked up at Allan's face, so carefully still as if scared I'd run if he showed anything. I didn't want to talk about leaving, but I admit there was a question I needed answered. "How did you find me?"  
He cocked a brow looking confused. "I looked."  
I blinked at him in disbelief. "No one has ever found me here. No one. Over ten years coming here and no one ever found me."  
He seemed unsure of my words, but determined in his answer. His hand flexed at my waist, holding me closer as if making sure I would listen carefully to what he was about to say. "Then they obviously didn't know you well enough to know where you would be."  
"You found me."  
Allan watched my expression, brushing the back of his hand across the unmarked side of my face. "I found you. I will always find you."  
I twined my fingers with his against my face. My voice was such a soft tone I would be surprise if he could hear me. "Do you promise?"  
He pressed his forehead against mine, staring into my eyes. "On my word of honor."  
"Goodbye Allan."  
Tilting his head ever so slightly, his eyes were even more intently on mine. As he did so he brushed his lips against mine, barely touching at all. "Goodbye Siobhan."

* * *

Eight nights had passed since I had said my goodbyes. Yet, it was my last goodbye that came into my dreams. No kiss, just the promise a little girl had waited most of her life to hear. But enough of that. My nights might still be spent wondering what was waiting for me back home, but my days were wonderfully preoccupied by Matilda and Rosa.  
As loud as the two of them could be, it was a wonderful relief to be with them. Being with two women who weren't likely to pull knives on anyone. The other wonderful thing about being with Matilda was the feeling of having my mother around again. Matilda and my mother were the two women who had taught me the craft of herbs. How nature and praise to all the gods and goddesses could cast a positive light in healing others.  
Herbs were always how we bonded for as far back as I could remember. As soon as I arrived at Matilda's cottage it was crushed arnica root and flowers that I was met with first. No words, just a salve for the bruise in it's full color on the side of my face. Of course when we finally got around to discussing the whole even it took a lot to remind Matilda that, while I did appreciate it, she was not allowed to go poison someone she brought into this world. It also greatly depressed her realizing that one of her predictions didn't look like it would turn out how she imagined. No 'healthy brood' with Will would appear. Of course I had been forced to update her on everything, which meant she now knew about Allan. She wasn't too sure what she thought of him, never having met him herself, but she seemed pleased with the fact he had kept me alive. Everything else would be reserved until she met him one day. Thankfully she had picked up on the fact I wasn't sure about my own feelings for him. This gave her enough clue not to push the topic. I'd had my heart broken for the last time for as far as I could help it. Yes, I admit I had feelings for Allan, but I wasn't sure how deep they were. It was dangerous to think about anyone this soon after being hurt so badly, but my feelings for Allan had started before this last heartbreak. This was not about clinging to the first person to show affection, this was about moving on, but I needed to do it properly.  
Matilda and I were moving bags of grain into the house while Rosa supervised.  
Matilda flicked me on the nose. "And where has your mind gone off to this morning little one?"  
I shook my head with a smile. "I had the same dream again last night. This is getting a bit tiring."  
Matilda grinned shooing her daughter and I inside. "They say the nighttime dreams show the hearts truest desires, aside from showing the future."  
I rolled my eyes. "Then I also suppose I am also destined to go on a long sea voyage sometimes in the future. Come now Matilda, where would I possibly go on a voyage to?"  
Rosa sat down on her groaning. "Mother!"  
I shook my head with a smile as Matilda went to check on her daughter. Apparently the little one Rosa was carrying enjoyed twisting and turning inside Rosa's womb. Sounded as if this was the second time 'he' had twisted himself around. Matilda was determined that the baby would be a boy from all the trouble he was causing. The first time it had happened was before I got to the cottage. Happening a second time was unsettling for Rosa and myself, but Matilda hushed us. She knew how to turn the babe around, something I had not yet learned.  
Matilda turned to me. "Siobhan, dear do me a favor and look through my jars. See if you can find john's wort, chamomile, and tansy. I want to make something up that should stop this turning."  
I smiled checking the jars and I listened to Matilda turn her grandchild the proper way. She would have to show me how to do this one of these days, just incase I ever needed it.  
Opening a series of jars with symbols on the sides I turned around finding Matilda standing behind me. "You need to restock on your chamomile. I brought a good part of my supply with me just incase, but I can't help with raspberries."  
She nodded tapping her tooth and looking through a few more jars.  
Rosa gave a loud groan. "Why does it hurt so much?"  
Matilda gave a laugh. "My little Rosa, you don't yet know pain. Try giving birth feet first, then you will know pain." She put back a jar she'd been looking into with a sigh. "I'll go out and grab some raspberries, maybe you'd like to come with me."  
I nodded grabbing my bag from her small table as she opened the door.  
Matilda was rushed by a group of guards who pulled her outside. I held Rosa back as we kept from the door. I spotted Gisborne coming forward on his horse. There was an obvious bad omen if I ever saw one.  
Gisborne sneered down from his steed to Matilda. "You are needed in Nottingham castle immediately."  
Rosa pushed forward and it took some good strength to keep her back. "Mother!"  
As they dragged her away Matilda turned back. "Rosa! Siobhan, take care of her!"  
Gisborne turned his attention to the cottage, but made sure the rest of the guard continued their way to the castle. "Siobhan? Really, this is interesting."  
I stood in front of Rosa. "I'm visiting a friend Sir Guy, I don't see how that is interesting."  
His lips turned up in a dangerous smile. "Perhaps." He turned his horse and rode off with the rest of his guard for the castle.  
Robin was wrong, I've been getting quite calm. I didn't even pull my knife out at Gisborne's retreating back.

* * *

"Rosa, please. Try to relax. I can't have you in an uproar. It's not good for you, the baby, or my nerves." I held out my hand, helping her get back into wagon. We'd been on the road for a little while now. "We'll go to my cottage, that way I can get word to Robin to help Matilda. That and I want you close. This little babe of yours is making too much of a fuss to be left alone. I wouldn't be surprised if today was the day."  
She groaned sitting down on the pillows in the back. "Siobhan, it hurts."  
I narrowed my eyes at her. "Did you drink the whole of the draft I gave you?"  
She nodded. "All of it, I wouldn't lie to you." She let her head fall back. "I don't know how women can do this all the time. Those women with thirteen children? How do they do it?"  
I shook my head with a smile as I climbed to steer the carriage again. "Some people do it for love...and stupidity much as I can figure."  
"Siobhan?" A figure stood in the middle of the road a few feet from me. "Thank god."  
As I neared I realized it was Robin. "Thank the goddess. I was on my way to see you."  
He jumped to sit next to me, shaking his head. "I came from speaking with Matilda. She's in the castle, taking care of the Sheriff's messenger. He knows where the King will be landing and we can't have him tell that information. Right now she's given him a draft that messed up his memory, but we need to get her out of there. She sent me to go get Rosa, said you were there too. I was hoping you would have enough sense to start your way back."  
"Well I do have some sense Robin." I paused looking at his face. It was tired looking and very hard. Something else was bothering him besides Matilda being captive. "Robin, what aren't you telling me? I can see it plain on your face. Something has happened."  
He took a deep breath not speaking. Bowing his head he exhaled form his nose before looking back up at me. "There's a traitor in the camp."  
"What?" I felt my fingers fall slack around the reins in my hands.  
Robin carefully took the reins from me nodding. "It's how the Sheriff and Gisborne are always ahead of us. I was hoping I was wrong, but Marian has been sneaking about. She was at Trip To Jerusalem Inn, and overheard Gisborne speaking to one of the bar maidens. That's where whoever it is meets. Who would betray me, Siobhan?"  
I shook my head in disbelief. "No one would do this on their own accord. Blackmail, torture, something must have happened Robin. No one would do this willingly."  
Robin nodded. "I can't imagine anyone doing that, but it's been done."

* * *

Robin shot his arrow and climbed into the back of the carriage with me. "What is wrong?"  
I shook my head, holding Rosa's hand. "Her baby turns. I've never had a case like this before. Matilda usually turns the babe around, but I've never seen her do it. It's something I never learned how to do."  
Robin gave a little shake of his head. "In any other case I would find it very amusing to learn there are things you don't know."  
The gang arrived all around the carriage confused.  
Allan was first to reach the back and raised a brow. "What is going on?"  
Robin hopped outside the carriage as Djaq took place next to me. The others gathered around all looking confused, and slightly angry. "We're taking her to the camp."  
"What, our camp?" John sounded shocked.  
Robin nodded. "This is Matilda's daughter, Rosa. We need to keep her in a safe location. I don't want the Sheriff's guards going to find her. I would say to keep her with Siobhan, but Gisborne knows they are friends. It would be the first place he would look." Robin looked at Djaq. "Djaq, the baby is the wrong way around."  
Rosa looked up at her with pleading eyes. "Do you know how to turn it?"  
Djaq looked at me confused. "Don't you know?"  
I shook my head. "I never had this problem. I've never seen Matilda do it before."  
Djaq looked at me and painted on a smile for Rosa. "Let's get you to a bed, shall we?"  
Rosa groaned as John and Robin helped her out of the carriage. "You don't do you?  
Djaq jumped down hurrying to help with Will and Much.  
Allan gave me his hand to help him down. "Have a pleasant vacation?"  
"Not hardly." Even so i couldn't help, but smile. "It reminded me why I mainly live alone. And why I spend most of my time with all of you men."  
His lips twitched into a smile as we headed into camp. "Did you get any thinking done?"  
I kept my head down walking in front of him. "Not enough and too much."  
Before he could say anything Robin appeared behind me. "Djaq said she'd help you however she can, but she's not sure either."  
"Wonderful, just wonderful. You-"  
"We need to know who the traitor is." Will stood tall, but his voice sounded almost defeated.  
Robin looked over at Much with exasperation.  
"I'm sorry, but this isn't the sort of secret I can keep."  
Robin looked at me for support. "Let's just deal with Rosa.."  
"TELL US!" I'd seen John yell, but usually not at Robin.  
Will turned around fist in hand. "Robin, there are people like Rosa who need our help every day. But we can't deal with them if we can't work as a gang. You suspect us."  
Robin sighed, now standing at my side. "All right its true. One of you is betraying us. You're meeting Gisborne and selling our secrets."  
Of course that started a small 'not me' competition.  
Robin held up his hands. "Stop this now. If the guilty man or woman confesses right now, I'll listen. Tell me what Gisborne said and offered. Tell me now, this is your one chance."  
There was silence.  
Then Much threw up his hands and stomped off. "I will not be treated with equal suspicion."  
Robin nodded looking around. "Well whoever you are, you've made your choice. And I will find you out." He took my shoulder and directed me into the back of the camp when the others had settled Rosa in. His voice fell to a whisper. "Right now, you are the only one I can fully trust."  
I followed his lead. "Thank you Robin. I'm glad you know enough that if I wanted to betray you I would simply kill you."  
He gave me a brief smile. "You are the only person I know that even in the worst situation can make a joke. Besides that knowledge you haven't ben around to learn half of the things we know until afterwards. I know enough to trust you, but because of this I'm forced to look at the facts. You and Marian are the only two people I can fully trust until this is all over." He sighed. "Why wouldn't anyone come forward?"  
I frowned at him. "Honestly Robin, that is a stupid question. Anyone who told you right there would be killed on the spot. That is a subject best kept to personally talking to them. I already told you what I think of this whole ordeal. No offense to your position, but you could have handled it better."  
He sighed. "No offense taken. Just, please take care of your friend while I try to figure the rest of our problems out."

* * *

Djaq walked back over with John. He looked at me with a strange look. "This is your idea?"  
I held up my hands. "John, I have no idea what I'm doing. I admit it. For once I'm at a complete loss." I squeeze Rosa's hand looking at him. "Please?"  
He sighed and sat beside me. He reached his hands to touch Rosa's large bump and gave a start.  
Rosa looked at him wide eyed. "What is it?"  
John's great mouth twitched. "It jumped." He composted himself and leaned an ear toward the bump. "Hello little one. You need to turn around." His hands felt around her stomach and gripped around her giant fingers flexing.  
Rosa gave a noise between a cry and a laugh. "That's it! You turned him around." She settled into her pillows chuckling. "He's back around."  
I smiled stroking Rosa's hair. "See, you're in quite good hands. Djaq is going to watch over you for a bit. I'm going to make a new draft. It's a bit different from your mum's but I think it will do nicely."  
Rosa nodded and closed her eyes. "Hurry back Siobhan. If mother can't be here you need to be."

* * *

Robin came running back into the camp with Djaq. "Siobhan-"  
"Robin, turning babies I am still confused about, but trust me about delivering them. The little one is coming."  
He nodded grabbing his bow. "Siobhan, stay here with Rosa. Do you need Djaq?"  
I shook my head. "It's okay Robin."  
Rosa leaned forward. "John? Can you stay?"  
John looked to Robin who nodded. He settled next to me while the others ran off.  
I took a deep breath and grabbed my lather thong tying up my hair. "Right then. Not squeamish are you John?"  
He frowned at me.  
I couldn't help, but grin. "All right no need to get testy. I've just had a few fathers and uncles decide they wanted to watch. Of course they would pass out before they saw the child. Just thought you might appreciate the warning." I looked around. Allan had been kind enough to boil up some water and Will found some clean cloths for me to use. "Right we have everything we need. Rosa control your breathing. John, give her your hand, keep a cool cloth to her head as well." I took position by her legs and caught his look. "What?"  
"Nothing, it's just...I have never seen you so bossy before."  
I smiled. "We all have our work and expertise John. I'm a seamstress and a midwife. I understand cloth and birthing. Beyond that I generally don't push others around. The things I know I take charge of."  
"And your medicine? I've never seen you like this with it?"  
"Yes, well I share expertise with Djaq, she knows many eastern treatments I've never heard of. So we combine our knowledge. I know most of the herbs that grow around, so the plants are my area of better knowledge. Djaq is a better at serious treatments, such as when we had to stitch up Marian. For this, I know she appreciates being with Robin over birthing a baby."  
Rosa interrupted our talk with a scream. It was only a matter of time now.  
John brushed her hair speaking to her softly. He's been keeping her mind off the pain for a while now, and was getting her to relax by telling stories, or anything about herself. "It's okay, everything is going to be okay." I watched as he tried to think a Where is the father?"  
Rosa heaved a breath, sighing out the words with her contraction. "In the wars." She breathed deep. "What's your wife's name?"  
"Alice."  
"So you've done this before with Alice? Why's it so hard?"  
"No, no. I was in the forest. I was an outlaw in the forest. Alice was alone."  
Rosa went to speak but screamed.  
My eyes widened. "Push, now!"

* * *

I gave Rosa some water, still laughing. "Oh my dear friend. Please let me be the one to tell your mother she was wrong."  
She snorted taking in the water. "Shush. They're coming. Compose yourself."  
Matilda came running forward taking position on the other side of her daughter. "Oh Rosa, are you all right? How's the lad? How's our little lad?"  
"No lad."  
"No lad?"  
Rosa shook her head as her mother bowed her head down. Rosa caught my eye over her head and nodded, a wicked grin on her face.  
It took great concentration not to laugh at one of Matilda's famous prediction being wrong. "No, not a lad. She's a girl."  
Matilda's head snapped up. "What?"  
John came over with the little girl in his arms. "And a good set of lungs on her."  
I smiled. "We'd only just got a moment's peace."  
Matilda jumped up taking her grandchild in her arms. "Well let's see if her grandmother can't set her off again. What's her name?"  
Rosa smiled looking over at John. "Alice. I'm going to call her Alice."  
I stood leaving the mother and grandmother to look at little Alice. I squeeze John's arm with a smile. "Good strong name that is." I met his smile with my own. "Thank you for your help."  
"I hardly did anything at all."  
"You kept her calm, you kept her mind focus. I've seen many a mother die because she breathes wrong. You kept her steady John. Thank you."  
He smiled, a bit sadly. "I'm glad I could be there for her."  
I knew he still regretted not being with Alice, but my words had helped. That was the point of them. Although he couldn't be there for Alice, he was there for another woman whose husband was far off. That in a way helped heal the wound.

* * *

John and I brought Matilda and Rosa up through the camp to meet up with Robin. We'd get them settled in their carriage on their way off. Matilda wasn't quite sure what she was going to do. On one hand she loathed the idea of giving up her home, on the other she just wanted to get her daughter and granddaughter to safety with her sister.  
I sighed. "How about this? You head straight to your sister's and I will find someone to bring all of your belongings to you. I doubt anyone will dare go to your cottage for a few days. Probably will all think it's haunted. Go enjoy your daughter and grand baby. I will take care of the rest."  
Matilda smiled still holding the little one in her arms and gave my head a kiss. "You are an angel sent among us little one." She lowered her voice to a whisper. "And I don't mind saying it, but my stars what a bunch of men you are constantly around. Will had grown into a good looking man, though I don't think much of his manners. And that Allan." She smirked at me. "No wonder you fancy him. Gorgeous eyes, fine sculpted face, nice arse."  
"Matilda!" I choked on my breath, laughing. "You can't say that."  
She stood up proudly. "I can and I did." She held up little Alice, speaking loudly. "Much, meet little Alice."  
It truly happened in a matter of moments. Henry cut his ropes and held the dropped knife to Much's throat.  
"Put it down Henry!"  
Henry smiled evilly. It seemed he'd come back to his senses again. "They say you don't kill anymore Robin. The King is finished. You and your gang are finished. The Sheriff, Prince John, the Black Knights? They will win."  
Robin let loose his arrow. We all watched as Henry fell to the ground, Much jumping aside, touching his neck. Robin simply shook head. "Not today they aren't."

* * *

Even in the dark I saw Robin's eyes narrow from our place in the back room. "Siobhan."  
"Robin, I don't like this. I really don't like this."  
"I wasn't asking for your blessing I was just letting you know what is going on. You, I do not lie to. You should know that. I only told you because I wasn't sure if I would need help or not. I already told you, you and Marian are the only people I can trust right now. I would have asked her to help, but she's still under watch from her guards. For all I know, Will could be the traitor coming here now. I don't know who is on my side Siobhan. I know I ask you for a lot but-"  
I held up my hand. "I'm sorry Robin, it's just this whole thing. It's been gone about all wrong."  
His eyes narrowed and I realized there was talking in the other room.  
No.  
Robin let loose an arrow striking the money bag Allan had pushed back toward the bar maiden.  
Allan backed up. "Robin."  
Robin walked out of the back room, eyes fixed on Allan. I followed right behind Robin, feeling my heart sink, inch by inch at the sight of Allan here.  
Robin leaned toward Allan, but spoke to the girl. "Leave us."  
"Stay there." Allan looked up and caught sight of me. "Siobhan..." The way he said my name, like a last prayer made my chest hurt an unbelievable amount. This wasn't fair. It wasn't happening, it couldn't be happening.  
"Get Out!"  
The girl jumped and left the room. I stayed where I was. I knew which of us Robin was speaking to, and I wasn't the one being told to leave.  
Robin took a breath, speaking low. "I need to talk to my spy."  
"What was that? With Will, you banished him."  
Robin walked toward me, then turned back around. "It was an act. Only that girl knew who was guilty. I knew the spy would come back here to cover his tracks. For all I knew it could be Will standing there." He shook his head. "But it's you."  
"Robin, it was over. Ask her. I made my decision."  
"Then what's this?"  
"I was giving it back."  
"You betrayed me, your friends, yourself, your country, your king. For what? A few silver coins? What is it you told Gisborne Allan?"  
"Nothing really."  
"Does he know about the camp?"  
"No."  
"Does he know about Marian?"  
"No."  
Robin pointed toward me. "Does he know about Siobhan?"  
Allan's voice rose, anger now apparent. "Of course not."  
"More lies?"  
"No! This was the last time, I promise. I was wrong. He captured me, he tortured me, I had no choice."  
Robin slammed him into a pillar. "Everything is a choice. Everything we do." He moved away from Allan shaking his head.  
Allan lifted his head up looking at Robin. "That's easy for you to say isn't it? You get the glory, the girl, everyone loves you. The king comes back and you get lands, a wife, everything. And what will I have?" He watched as Robin paced back and forth. "You're always in the sun Robin. And I'm always in the shade."  
Robin moved forward and grabbed Allan's throat. "Is that meant to be an excuse?"  
"Give me another chance please. I wouldn't have let Gisborne hurt any of us. I wouldn't have told him anything like that."  
I moved forward. "Robin, no. Please..."  
He ignored my words. "harmless lies, innocent betrayals? They don't exist Allan."  
"Robin, I've changed. How can I make you believe that?"  
"You can't. And the funny part, the worst part is, you might be telling the truth."  
"I am."  
"And how am I suppose to believe that anymore?"  
"Robin, I swear to you, on my life."  
Robin took out a dagger and I'd had enough. I ran forward, hand on his shoulder. "Robin, don't kill him, please."  
He took in my face and the man he had pressed against the wall. He stared at Allan and let go. "You're lucky I've left you with a knife to swear upon. Never, never, let me set eyes on you again."  
Allan rubbed his neck with a hand looking between Robin and myself. Once his eyes were on me they stayed there. "Siobhan, I-"  
I shook my head. I wasn't going to cry, I refused it, but my voice was going to betray my hurt. "I can't hear it Allan. I cannot bare to hear anything you might say. Please, just let me leave in peace."  
"I never wanted to hurt you. Ever."  
I shook my head backing out of the door while both he and Robin stared at me. "Funny, but I've learned what we want and what happens never seem to go along together."  
I felt rather than heard Robin beside me. "Siobhan."  
I shook my head holding up my hands. "What I said to Allan, applies to you as well Robin. Leave me in peace. I cannot bare to continue hearing everyone tell me how sorry they are for the position I always seem to find myself in. Just...leave me be."

* * *

It was as if someone else was in control of my body as I walked into my cottage. I closed the front door and let the barrier fall into place to secure it. I did the same to the back door before shutting all my windows. Without anything else I collapsed on my bed.  
There were no tears, there would be no tears as far as I could help it. The noise was plenty. Dry chest heaving sobbing? Yes. But no tears. Not this time, not yet anyway.  
I folded my arms around my pillow trying to keep my mind clear. Because if I let my mind go back to what had just happened, if I thought about any of this...How many times was I going to let this happen?  
First Will, not Allan...I didn't want to believe or think about it, but it hurt more than it should. Yes, this was getting betrayed back to back, but the pain was something I didn't understand. I was angry at everyone. I was angry at Much for never sticking up for himself half the time. I was angry at John for hiding in the forest instead of staying with his wife and be there for his son. I was angry at Djaq for being the smarter, better liked woman. I was angry with Marian for holding some kind of feelings for Gisborne even though she was in love with Robin. I was angry with Will for always being the one to hurt me and even now finding new ways to do so. I was angry with Robin for not seeing this coming, not letting Allan speak in private, not listening. I was angry with Allan for giving in, for being so damn charming, and making me feel I needed to be on his side.  
I felt around in the dark until my fingers reached my quilt at the end of the bed. I froze, fingertips touching something that was not quilt. It was paper. I swung my legs out of bed letting my night vision find my largest candle. Lighting it I brought it back to my bed grabbing the letter. Somehow I thought I already knew who it would be from.

_Siobhan,  
If you are reading his than I was too late. You hate me and I would not blame you, but please, finish reading this letter before burning it. I have done this terrible thing, and if I did not get this letter back than I have truly failed. Gisborne captured me when we first learned of the existence of the Black Knights. Know now, I tried, but even I have my breaking point. Anything I ever revealed we always found a way around. I would never reveal anyone in the gang or our informants. I love the gang and I would never betray Marian. You should know better than to ever believe I would betray you. My words change nothing, I know, but know you were always safe. I tried to speak to Robin on the side, but he wouldn't talk to anyone. Robin will never believe me, but you know people better than anyone I have ever met. You can look into someone and see what is there. Look in my heart and know I love you all. I would die rather than to lose any of you, especially you my dear Siobhan.  
I've never been good at speeches from the heart and that is why I write this to you. I needed to tell you all of this without you trying to kill me. I need to get my words across.  
I love you Siobhan, and I hope I can redeem myself someway, someday. I need you to know I have always been sincere in my feelings.  
I do not ask you to protect or defend me in anyway. Just please, if I ever cross your thoughts, even for a second, don't let your feelings turn to anger. I don't deserve that favor, but I need to at least ask.  
With all my heart I am sorry,  
Allan_

Finishing the letter the tears can fully. Most of all I was angry with myself. Because I believed everything he said and I knew he was right. I was mad for the face I wanted to defend Allan, knew he was right, and yet nothing I did would matter. I couldn't be angry with Allan, and I could still see the point Robin had.  
I was angry with myself for not having a clue what to do.

* * *

**A/N:  
Okay so I spent my week between orientation and traveling without a laptop or time to start writing this chapter. My first day back I was abducted by two of my dear friends who decided we needed to watch movies, play Wii, and punch me in the chest. One of them was promptly kicked in the crotch. Sad that because his brilliant mind does inspire some of the lines that come out of mouths of Robin, Will, and Allan. Then I spent time in the ER with family and have only now gotten a chance to type. I am a horrid person. I apologize.  
Now onto my lovely reviewers:  
QuietOne364: Aw why thank you.  
Cowgirl: I apologize, but I follow where the story takes me, and my character. You'll just have you see what I do. I don't want to change the entire story line because, lets face it, that would be a terrible move on my part. Trust, it will be worth it in the end.  
Victoria Larue: Thank you so much! I'm not a writer who brags about any of my stories...ever at all, but my Robin Hood fics I admit I am proud of. I spend a lot of time on thinking of my addition to the story line. Thank you for reading!  
Instantstar15: Thank you very much for all your wonderful reviews. I hope your friend is enjoying the first part. This second part will just be taking a while because I have a good amount a time being spent actually working rather than lazing about. But I shall do my best to update better.**


	6. A Look at Change

**Disclaimer: I own no part of the BBC television adaptation of Robin Hood. Nothing. And the more properly I put it the less likely I am for someone to kill me.**

* * *

"She looks awful."  
"It has only been two days Much."  
"Still he betrayed us."  
"You know nothing at all about women, do you Much? Did you see the way he looked at her lately? So soon after she fought with Will...Is it any wonder she is upset?"  
I sighed finally coming into their line of sight and pretended I hadn't heard what Djaq and Much had been saying. "Well, here are your clothes. Since I'm back early I thought I would get a head start on every thing I left behind. I'll just be on my way."  
I admit, I was angry how my voice sounded more like a whisper than a convincing statement.  
Djaq met my eyes and for once I found sympathy, not pity. It was a bit more comforting than what I had seen previous in everyone else's eyes. Much looked like a fish gulping for air and put his head down, refusing to look at me anymore. Will had come from the back of the camp, polishing a harp. He caught sight of me and froze. At least he had the decency to look embarrassed.  
John came behind him, apparently not noticing everyone else's stillness. He was rolling up his sleeves and searching for something in one of the baskets by the wall. "I don't understand women any better than you do Much, but it is a bit obvious. The lass is in pain. In the time we've actually seen her she moved around like the walking dead. I mean she-" He caught sight of Will's look and stood, finally seeing me. "Oh."  
I shook my head holding my hand up defensively. "This is not even worth it anymore. If you need anything leave a note on the door. Otherwise I'm headed to the castle."  
I walked away muttering darkly to myself. Of course I was upset, and yes I was in pain. Everyone was finding it scary how far away I was getting, but even Djaq said it. It had only been two days. I could already tell she was the only one who would be on my side in this matter. Goddess knew no one else really cared. Best example was seeing Will the other day. I don't even think he had even realized it. He was upset of course about anyone betraying Robin, but there was still a smirk on his face. Always finding a way to rub it in. Always finding different ways to hurt me, now without even trying.  
I broke through the trees and found Robin coming my way, apparently having already checked my cottage "Siobhan? What are you doing here? I thought you'd be enjoying the rest of your leave."  
I sighed. "I was getting tired of listening to everyone wait outside my cottage whispering about me. I need fresh air, I have work to be done. I can't bother listen to everyone teat me as if I were on my death bed."  
He winced. "I told them not to."  
"Don't sound all high and mighty Robin. You were the first person waiting."  
He crossed his arms. "You left the inn without looking back. I don't like seeing you upset. I especially don't like hearing you cry."  
I shook my head walking away. "Then you shouldn't have been listening at my window."  
"Siobhan, he betrayed all of us. That includes you."  
I pursed my lips, but couldn't walk away. I spun around, closing my eyes with a sigh. I pulled Allan's letter carefully out of my sleeve. "Do me a favor, just read this. Don't say anything just read it."  
Robin eyed the letter than carefully took it from me. I watched as he read it, taking care to keep his expression blank. He finished, folded the letter and handed it bak to me. "Go to the castle. Marian will inform you of all that has happened."  
I took the letter from him and shook my head in disbelief. "Sometimes Robin, I wonder how someone whose heart is so full of love can be so cruel to others."  
He sighed, finally showing some kind of emotion. He was tired, and this whole ordeal had bothered him, I could tell. "What did you want me to say Siobhan? That I'm happy that Allan is still trying to win you over despite what happened?"  
I gave a tired laugh. "No, didn't know what you would say. Robin, just remember it was you who told me to move on. To stop hurting myself by waiting for Will to make up his mind. You told me to move on, to find someone who would be able to take care of me. It's not my fault the person you leaned me toward ended up not being able to take care of himself."  
I would have the last word on this, and for once he was letting me. Either Robin was finally speechless, or he finally realized how much I was hurting. And even though it was killing me, I wouldn't say anything more. Let Robin brood about it for a bit.

* * *

I sat on the ledge overlooking the courtyard, eyeing the apple in Marian's hand. "Do I really look like the walking dead?"  
I had made my rounds in the castle and a few stopped around the village before finally coming to sit with Marian. I still had no idea what was going on, but if my help was needed straight away Robin would have left a hint about it.  
Marian looked over my face and threw me the apple. "Eat something. You don't look terrible, but you aren't looking exactly wonderful either." She paused watching me bite into the apple. "How...how are you?"  
I paused while chewing. I slowly swallowed and stared at her. "Please tell me this hasn't gotten so bad that you are inquiring about me. If so I am in serious trouble."  
"Siobhan..."  
I held the apple in front of me like a shield. "Marian, please. The looks, the tone, the 'He betrayed us' speeches are getting old and tired. This whole sympathy bit is worse than the ending with Will. I don't want pity. I just want everyone to let it be and to stop making excuses or speeches they think will make me feel better."  
I sighed and bit back into the apple. Running away was starting to look like the most promising route to take Dan had been right about that. I could probably find work anywhere, even as a midwife if there was no open position as a seamstress. I mean worst case I always had an open invitation to go to Belgium.  
Yes, the Count had been quite generous with his promise of his gift. A full crate of material had come for me. I had fallen into the pile laughing so much Allan has insisted I had finally snapped. My first order of business had been writing the Count a letter of thanks and making him an evening jacket. Amazing how measurements could stay in my head. The rest of the fabric would be saved for special occasions. If I lived to see my birthday, I was going to make myself the best dress imaginable. Maybe I could start it now...  
"Siobhan? Siobhan, have you heard a word I just said?"  
I blinked focusing back on Marian. "Sorry. I lost my train of thought for a moment. What can I do for you?"  
She looked me over with a careful eye. "Have you been sleeping?"  
I rolled my eyes. "Yes, mother. In fact I slept in a bit this morning. Now, please continue."  
"Guy has invited me to the party honoring the King's birthday. In reality there's a document to be signed by the Black Knights. It's proof of their treason, we need to get a hold of it. Robin and I found it and there are many signatures. One is Winchester, and old friend of my father's. Robin is going to try and persuade him to see things our way. And-"  
We paused seeing Gisborne coming toward us. "Marian, just the person I was looking for."  
I kept my position munching the rest of my apple. Amazing how a simple fruit could make my say just a little brighter. Food...good thing Marian had it around. I don't remember eating these past two days.  
I looked into the courtyard with a smile as I noticed the gang dressed as a group of minstrels. Of course I then proceeded to choke on my apple seeing Allan ride into the gates on a horse. The worst part was it wasn't a spluttering choke, I was actually choking on a bit of apple. Gisborne puled me from the window and struck his hand against my back, popping the stuck apple out of my throat.  
I leaned on the ledge, taking in a deep breath, coughing my throat clear. "Thank you Sir Guy. I don't know what came over me."  
He nodded, and bid us goodbye heading down the hall in a hurry.  
I turned to Marian suspiciously. "What what that all about?"  
"What was the choking all about?"  
I frowned. "I saw him on a horse coming into the courtyard."  
"Him?"  
I gave her a look, implying she knew exactly who 'him' was. I wasn't sure why, but I hadn't been able to say Allan's name aloud. "Yes, him. Now, what did you dear friend want?"  
She lifted a shoulder looking after him. "I'm not sure. He said he needed to speak to me, but one of the page boys told him the Sheriff needed him straight away."  
I sighed. "If he proposes again, let's try to say no this time, shall we?"

* * *

"Bored, bored, bored."  
Marian threw a crunched up ball of parchment at my head. "Siobhan, stop it. You're acting like a little girl. To be honest it is scaring me a bit."  
I pushed myself up on my elbows from my position on her bed. "I need excitement."  
The door flew open that moment, Gisborne striding in.  
That wasn't the excitement I was hoping for.  
Marian straightened the papers at her desk looking flustered. "Guy, please give me the courtesy of knocking."  
He saw me on the bed and motioned to Marian's traveling trunk. "Siobhan, get Lady Marian's belongings." He turned to her, brining over the trunk. "You're leaving. Now."  
"What? Guy, why?"  
He dropped the trunk and placed his palms flat on her writing desk. "Because the Sheriff has made a deal with Winchester, and he wants you."  
"Then tell him he can't have me."  
"The Sheriff has agreed. I cannot protect you. Listen to me you need to run now."  
"I can't leave my father."  
"I will take care of your father."  
"But I-"  
"Marian why do you always resist me I'm attempting to help you." He went to get the trunk then changed his mind grabbing a large traveling bag and throwing clothes into it.  
"I can see that. Why do you work for the Sheriff if you disagree with his choices?"  
"I have nobody." He turned to me. "Siobhan, please help Lady Marian pack. Convince her this is the right choice."  
I snorted grabbing her clothes. "You don't have to convince me of anything Sir Guy."  
He gave me a wary look, but let it go still speaking to Marian. That was a first. He must be seriously worried about it. Usually he felt the need to put me in my place. Times seem to be changing a lot lately.  
He placed money in her palm. "This should give you enough for safe passage. I've instructed a man on the West gate to let you out." He turned to me. "Siobhan, hide her at your cottage if you must, but you cannot possibly keep her there for long. I will help in anyway I can, but she needs to get out of the castle straight away. Please."  
The please caught me off guard, but I curtsied and continued packing a bit faster than before. I may not have liked him, but at least he cared enough to get Marian out of what was sounding like a very dangerous situation.  
From the corner of my eye I saw him give Marian a swift kiss on the cheek before leaving.  
I blinked at Marian, with a sudden grin. "I'm telling Robin."  
She frowned. "We need to pack."  
I rolled my eyes grabbing a traveling bag from beneath her bed. "You never looked over here have you? I've had a bag ready for you since you moved back to the castle. Just change."  
She nodded moving swiftly, while I added her jewelry and letters to the bag. From her jewelry box I tossed her the dagger she wore in her hair. She nodded thanks and went out the door first, while I carried her bag behind her.  
I should have realized something was wrong when Gisborne was waiting for us outside.  
"Take her. Sheriff's orders."  
Marian's eyes grew to a frightening size. "Guy?"  
His guards grabbed her, dragging her away in shackles, while she was still shouting. "Guy!"  
I rounded on him. "Are you that low? You warn her and then drag her off to be taken?"  
His eyes narrowed. "You should not speak to me in such a way."  
"Well, someone needs to because you obviously have no heart. One moment you actually seem human, the next you seem as if you have never felt a single thing for another human being. Have you a heart, or is there simply a black abyss?"  
His whole body stilled. "Guards. Have the seamstress locked up for the festivities."  
"You most be joking!"  
He leaned in baring his teeth. "You will soon find, I do not take insults lightly."

* * *

I watched the unfolding before me in anger. Someday I was going to learn keeping my mouth shut might save lives. Someday, but today didn't seem to be the day. My arms were tied above my head on a branch of the same tree I had been held under arrest the year before. Making matters worse my legs were also tied together so I had no home reaching any of my knives. How the guards hadn't felt them was beyond me. I think they felt so badly they were in a hurry. No one wanted to tie me up because at some point or another I'd probably helped deliver your child, or sold you clothing. The Sheriff was making a speech about having a fight to the death because common outlaws here were in reality against King Richard. I doubt the irony was lost on anyone in the crowd.  
The fight to the death was to be held over a massive pot of oil. The pot had been used in past for solstice feasts and the like, but the Sheriff had gotten creative. The fight itself was between Robin and Allan, which only made already horrid matters worse. This was the first time I'd really seen Allan since the Inn. Yes, I had seen him ride in, but at the sight of him I started choking. Now I could see the way he looked at Robin, and the bags under his eyes. He was in a bad state, and that didn't make me feel any better.  
His eyes had caught me and it made matters worse. I just couldn't look away. I wasn't crying, but the pain in my shoulders lessened as the pain of the memory grew. Robin's eyes met mine as well and he mouthed an apology. Whether the apology was for the state we were all in, or the fact he was going to have to fight Allan, I wasn't sure. Probably both.  
The guards poked both men, forcing them to face each other with their large mallets.  
I watched the fight proceeded and went on to try and wiggle out of my bondage. If I could just get one hand loose I think I'd be able to get out of it.  
My head snapped up as the Sheriff started yelling. "Outlaws!"  
I noticed the gang breaking their instruments and started to fight. Guards were dropping, and I noticed Allan and Robin had jumped off the pot. John took out a guard that was headed at Allan. It looked as if Allan thanked him, but John simply slammed him with his staff screaming how he was a traitor.  
I managed to loosen the ropes around my wrists and fell to the ground hard. My eyes suddenly zeroed in as Robin shot a few arrowing into the pot of oil, watching it leak black ooze everywhere. Another shot with a flaming arrow hit the oil. The oil that was now pooling at my legs. I was still stunned from the drop and went to undo the ropes at my feet as the fire came racing toward me. Of all the ways to die I never thought my end would come by fire.  
Arms pulled me quickly from behind as the fire lapped at my feet and I was suddenly underneath my protector's body. I groaned trying to sit up.  
"Siobhan, can you stand?"  
I groaned recognizing the voice, and none to happy about it. Somehow I still managed to respond without yelling. "My ankles."  
Allan's eyes flicked to my ankles and went to my wrist. "I'm going to cut off the ropes, are you fine with that?"  
I let my head fall against the stone ground and closed my eyes. "Yes."  
I felt him take a knife from one of my wrist sheath's and cut the ropes at my ankles. I rolled my ankles around glad to truly be able to feel them again.  
Allan gave me his hand helping me stand. "Siobhan, I-"  
"Don't say it. If you say it I will be forced to hurt you." Even standing right next to him, looking at him, I couldn't bring myself to use his name.  
"I'm sorry. I truly-"  
I slapped him so hard across the face I could see the outline of my hand. "I said don't."  
With that I turned on my heel walking fast up the stone steps toward Marian. "Marian-"  
She ran forward grabbing my hands in her cuffed ones. "Siobhan, I can't. What will I do without you?"  
Winchester looked between us and turned to a guard. "Cuff the girl as well. Lady Marian will need a servant."  
Before I could argue I was grabbed and cuffed, being dragged away with Marian.  
Her eyes were wide as we were pushed into Winchester's carriage.  
He nodded his head to us. "If you'll pardon me, I need to gather some information. i will join you both in a moment."  
I narrowed my eyes. "Marian. I am going to find a way out of this. If I have to-"  
Winchester came back in the carriage and was greeted to me spitting in his face. Maybe not the most mature or smarted move, but damned if it didn't make me feel a bit better.  
Wiping his cheek he motioned to one of his guards. "If you would please gag Lady Marian's servant, I'd be much obliged."  
One of his guards came forward and nodded, stepping into the carriage. His hood was low over his face while he leaned over to do up the gag. As he leaned forward I heard his words quietly again my ear. "I promised I'd always find you. Sit tight and I will get you out of here."  
My eyes widened as the guard stepped back outside, Winchester pushing his way in.  
He sat and took a deep breath looking between myself and Marian. "Silence, how lovely."

* * *

The carriage came to a halt and I hid my smile, which wasn't too hard with the gag. I'm sure it ended looking like I was in pain.  
Marian leaned forward undoing the gag. "What's going on? You had the oddest look on your face when that guard gagged you."  
"I think, I cannot even believe I'm going to say this. I think Gisborne came to save you."  
"What?" She turned, startled, and sue enough Gisborne came into the carriage. "Guy?"  
He uncuffed her hand and bent quickly to undo the leg shackles. "You're safe now Marian."  
I watched as he helped her out of the carriage. "Uh, hello. A hand?"  
Allan peaked his head inside, uncuffing me and helping me up. "Was there really a need to slap me so hard?"  
I looked at his face and stormed out of the carriage. Turning to the Sheriff I gave a curtsy. "I thank you sir."  
He gave me a smile, I swear was genuine. And scarily enough like an uncle or grandfather would give to reassure a small one. "I can't let some crazy man run off with my seamstress now can I? Your work would be missed too greatly."  
I smiled inclining my head again and took in my surroundings, trying to figure out the quickest way to my cottage.  
Allan came up behind me on his horse, holding his hand out to me. "Siobhan, please?"  
"No. I can find my own way home thank you."  
He turned his horse to block my path, sounding frustrated. "Siobhan, don't be so damned thick headed. Let me bring you home."  
Gisborne brought his horse over to us, Marian riding behind him. He looked between us with a raised brow. "You know each other?"  
I went to open my mouth, but Allan beat me to it. "We did, years ago. Her mother and mine were good friends. I lost contact with Siobhan, I'm quite sorry I did."  
I nodded my head keeping my voice steady. "I thought you would be dead by now."  
He winced and Gisborne's lips twitched. "Mustn't be too harsh on his Siobhan. As far as I can tell he saved you from burning from the fire before. Of course that is none of my business. I will simply let the two of you catch up then." He turned his horse and stared back down the path, Marian giving me a sympathetic look.  
The Sheriff paused beside us. "Siobhan is there a problem?"  
I looked between the Sheriff and Allan, internally sighing. "No sir." I took Allan's hand as he helped me on the back of the horse, and took his lead with the lie. "Simply catching up with an old friend."  
The Sheriff noticed the way Allan's eyes lingered on my face with a smile. "Well then. Working for us just a few hours and already has his sights set on someone. By the by, your name? Guy neglected to tell me."  
"Allan, sir."  
He nodded his head. "Well then, I will leave you alone to chat. I would watch myself Allan, I am not sure Tobias of Redhill will take kindly to your attentions toward Siobhan."  
Allan nodded his head, but continued speaking. "I did not realize she was spoken for sir. It's been a long time since we've spoken."  
The Sheriff gave a small laugh. "Oh nothing like that. I'm sure she can tell you she does not think much of Tobias. To be honest no one truly does. He causes too many problems."  
"Than why keep him sir?"  
A strange and wicked smile came across the Sheriff's face. "Why indeed?" He tapped his heels on the sides of his horse, heading off to catch up with Gisborne and Marian.  
Allan turned his head as I placed my hands loosely at his sides. "I deserved that. The slap, the words, all of it."  
I turned my head, not looking at him. "It hurts. You hurt me."  
I felt him face front leading us slowly behind the others. "Did you get my letter."  
I hesitated. "Yes."  
"And you read it? All of it before burning it?"  
"I didn't burn it."  
"Am I going to have to ask a thousand questions to get a solid answer?"  
I sighed. "I read the letter, I did not burn it. I...I believe you, and that makes my life more difficult. Making matters worse Marian's scared to talk to me and the others are treating me on a variety of levels. Djaq is trying to show some kind of support. Much and John shake their heads and think I should see it their way. Will doesn't realize it, but he's a bit too cheerful about seeing me this upset. Robin doesn't know what to do with me."  
"I didn't realize...I..."  
"Please don't say anything else. Just, drop me off at my cottage."  
"Siobhan."  
I didn't say a word, but silently curse the tears I felt running down my face.  
"Siobhan, please just say my name."  
I swallowed carefully and my voice was shaking. "I can't."  
He stopped right outside my cottage. "Can't or won't?"  
I slid off the back of his horse, but he caught my wrist. "Please."  
"Can't or won't Siobhan?"  
"You are not the same person anymore. You're not...You're not the Allan-a-Dale I started to fall in love with. You're not the Allan I first met." I yanked my wrist back, tears falling faster. "Happy, Allan? Happy I said your name now?"  
He reached out for me, but I stepped back, hands in front of me. I turned on my heel going into the house and shutting the door behind me.  
Allan's voice came clearly from outside, though he did not shout. "As long as it takes me Siobhan, I want to be that man for you again. I need a second chance."  
I blinked my eyes sliding down my front door. I hoped he could do it, for both of our sakes.

* * *

**A/N:  
So. Happy 4th of July to my American friends. Yes I'm a bit late, but I was at fireworks then played Guitar Hero with some friends...who then proceeded to go make out in my back room. Nothing is as awkward as feeling like the third wheel in your own house. It happens.  
And it makes me realize I need a guy in my life...desperately. Because I never cry, ever it's a flaw. But just sitting here alone writing and realizing what was going on in the back room made me quite lonely...  
Enough of my woes, on to my thank yous.  
QuitOne364: Glad you liked it.  
Cowgirl: I seem to be getting really good at this whole heartbreaking thing. My friend, and fellow writer, who doesn't even watch Robin Hood read the conversation I wrote between Will and Siobhan in chapter 4. She decided I should take up a career in trying to make others cry. Aside from that yes, Allan's letter. Weird I got mad while writing it. I think I'm channeling Siobhan a bit. Yes he can read and write, as far as I'm going to tell with the gang I don't think Much or John are going to be able to. I know in the series for sure that Much cannot, but I don't think the reading/writing issue will have further play into the story.  
Instantstar15: Oh, don't get me wrong I love reviews. My post was just trying to explain about the late update. Hey reviews make me smile. About the beginning, really? I thought I had made it too obvious and was a bit upset. Do tell me, who did you think was there? And I agree. Men, enough said.  
gostcat: I'm so happy you liked them. It's nice to see someone who also liked the transition between the two stories. I didn't know how everyone would take it.**


	7. A Killing Dance

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, thought it would be cool if I did.**

* * *

I took a deep breath and walked into the camp with a smile. I was starting to feel a wee bit better everyday. It was a wonderful thing. After my three days of crying and grief for Allan, it was finally over. I could breathe normally again. I could walk out the door without feeling like a hand was wrapped around my heart. Of course, it was an added bonus making the others a bit uneasy with my smiles. I think Much was most scared. He hadn't let me cook, or near any of the knives. Then again, it must have bothered the others at least a bit, because they seemed to be following Much's lead with the whole, no cooking, nor any sharp objects idea. I don't think they believed I'd stab any of them. What upset me was knowing the reason they did so was because they thought I would hurt myself. No matter. Every day things were getting just a tad better.  
A perfect example was visiting Marian the other day. Though I did not see Allan or Tobias, apparently she's been sneaking around when they'd finally met. Better yet it was the Sheriff that had introduced them. He had dropped my name into the talk, adding that Allan and I were old friends. Apparently the two had had a long conversation after the Sheriff left. Tobias left in a huff while Allan left with a small smile. From the little Marian had learned, Allan had been vague, but had swayed toward some kind of a history between us in our past. As much as I liked the idea of truly annoying Tobias, I had a feeling this would not turn out well. What the Sheriff was playing at I had no idea. I wasn't one hundred percent sure I truly wanted to know either.  
"Good morning everyone."  
Everyone stopped eating staring at me.  
I threw my hands in the air. "By the goddess, would you all stop it with those looks? I'm fine, stop treating me like I'm about to die. I was coming to inform you, you've got a visitor coming along the road. By all means though, just stand there with your mouths open."  
There was a clanging behind me and I jumped up, staring at the gong. "What was that?"  
Will jumped with a grin. "New alarm, new trap. Everything seems to be in working order."  
Everyone jumped up to find their new contributor to the poor of Nottingham.  
"I'll just wait here then."  
Djaq lingered behind to speak to me quickly. "Siobhan, in honesty how are you?"  
I gave her a smile. "I am slowly getting better. Not perfect, but recovering."  
She gave my shoulder a squeeze. "I know how the others feel and I am on your side for this matter. I believe Allan is still good, just confused. Do you know what made him..."  
I nodded as her voice faded. "He gave me a letter. After you go seek our your, uh, visitor You're more than welcome to read it." I gave her a quick hug before she went off. "And Djaq? Thank you. It's nice to have someone speak to me that doesn't think I'm betraying everyone by not thinking that Allan is completely evil."  
She smiled and ran off to join the others. Having someone on my side, especially someone in the gang, made my day just a little brighter.

* * *

I stretched my arms above my head watching Robin run past me to the treasure trove pulling out bags and boxes. I was met with a few disgruntled faces and a new comer. "Part of me wants to know and the other part wonders if I should ask."  
Will looked at me dumbfounded. "We're stealing from the rich to give to the rich."  
John nodded. "That's the idea apparently."  
I turned to Djaq. "I'm missing something big here." I noticed the new comer was wearing the same thing the man on the road had worn. "Wait a moment..."  
Robin turned around throwing a bag of coin to me. "The money is to help him marry his sweetheart. Think of it as a wedding present."  
I lifted the bag in my hands. "When did weddings become to pricy?"  
"Since the bride in question happens to be property of the Church."  
"Ah, another bond with Canon of Birkley?"  
Much nodded, still giving an evil look at one of the bags. "Why can't we just give them a toasting fork like everyone else?"  
Robin threw up his hands. "I have a plan, trust me." Even with the looks he kept smiling. "I promise it's a good plan. We load up the chest, fill the bottom with sand and put a hole in it. We plug the hole until the guards take it into the castle and follow the trail of sand."  
"Robin the plan-"  
He clapped a hand over my mouth interrupting me with a smile. "I have a plan. Just go get the clothes. No need to go in being too obvious."  
I pinched his hand. "All right, no need to get testy."  
The men went to load up the trunk on the flat wagon to bring to the castle. Djaq and I went through the pile of clothing I had made for various occasions. Ever since we had to sneak Djaq in as a servant girl during the Count's stay I'd decided having disguises could be helpful. Nothing too flashy, just because they wouldn't be used, but I had made a few simple things. They were going as porters so mainly wide brimmed hats and coats with universal emblems.  
Djaq leaned over slipping into her jacket. "So about that letter..."  
I nodded throwing the clothes to the others. I nodded and Djaq and I headed out to the road. We would be the first scouts to check to see if anything was happening up ahead. Last thing we needed was to get ambushed before the plan went through. Especially with the amount of money and jewels we had in this whole operation.  
Once we were far enough ahead I handed Djaq the letter. "If you have anything to say, please just wait until you finish reading it. I asked Robin the same thing, but I should have known he wouldn't say anything."  
She nodded taking the letter from me and reading it carefully.  
I shouldn't have watched her read it, but I had to. Her lips formed over certain words. I noticed she passed over one part. I watched as she mouthed 'I would rather die', and stared at the same spot before moving on. She finished, I knew she had because she kept walking, but seemed far away. Finally she folded the letter handing it back to me.  
I took it waiting to see what she would do. I tied it into the inside of my sleeve waiting for her to speak. All the extra ties and pockets in my clothes were coming in handy more and more everyday. Although I did believe carrying Allan's letter around with me constantly may not have been the healthiest thing to do in the world. I would just ignore that for now.  
"Allan-a-Dale. He will never cease to amaze me."  
I let out a laugh that ended up sounding more like a sob. "Sorry, go on."  
"That letter, he is not lying. I can tell just like you can Siobhan. Allan is not a bad person. He made his mistake, we all make them. Some bigger than others, but I believe him. I know everyone has a breaking point. I believe he really is going to try to redeem himself." She looked at me closely. "What happened when they killed Winchester?"  
"He tried to talk. It didn't go very well, but he seems to be trying. He knows he hurt me and he says he wants to do anything to have a second chance."  
She nodded and we walked in silence for a few feet. Another look my way and Djaq gave a small smile. "I noticed you can say his name again."  
I gave a sad smile. "Allan noticed I couldn't say it either." I sighed and filled her in on the entire conversation we had had after the rescue.  
Djaq stopped walking and I stopped next to her confused. She looked around us and grabbed me in a hug. I was taken aback but hugged her in return.  
We pulled back and I gave a little laugh. "I'm not sure what that was for, but thank you."  
"You carry a very heavy burden on your shoulders. Aside from that no one seems to be around to make things easier, I thought you might need a hug."  
"A hug is always welcomed, but not as much a a friend." I smiled, more at ease this time. "It's nice to have someone who isn't thinking of ways to force me to be happy according to how they think I should be. The gang...well you've seen how they are more than I have. Marian isn't exactly supportive either. She's worried about me, but her comfort feels not only forced, but confused as well. It's just nice having a friend, not just someone who feels sorry for me." I gave a light sigh. "Tell me the truth, how are they really?"  
She rolled her lips around thinking about my question. "Much finally shut up, and doesn't talk about it unless it comes up. I suppose you have noticed he's been keeping the knives away."  
"I've noticed. You can tell him to stop. It's not like I'm going to hurt anyone, or myself. For that matter if I really wanted to it wouldn't be hard seeing as I carry knives on me at all times."  
"Point taken, I tried making the same one, but you know Much. John simply shakes his head, mutters some things, but doesn't voice it allowed because he knows it hurts you. Robin doesn't speak about it at all. Doesn't acknowledge it. And Will..."  
"I'm almost afraid to hear about him."  
"He's handling it very odd, but understandable."  
"Understandable? Djaq? I saw him smirk when he realized I was hurt. After all that he did to me he still takes too much pleasure in my pain."  
Djaq held up her hands in defense. "I didn't say it was right. I simply said it was understandable. Let me explain. When you both...ended it." She hurried on before I could stop her. "Not that I blame you. You both had to end it before you killed each other. You both hurt each other. You may not realize it Siobhan, but he was hurting after you ended it. It only took three days for him to deliver Luke and come back. That was even spending time with his aunt. He wanted to come back here. He wasn't happy. I think part of it, besides you leaving, was believing you ended it because of Allan."  
"I would never." I let out a deep breath and lifted fingers to my temple rubbing it gently. "I need to explain myself apparently. I did nothing to internationally hurt Will. I didn't believe it would be easy for him, but it wasn't easy for me either. He will always be my first love and he knows that. I just couldn't let him keep hurting me. This had nothing to do with Allan at all. This had to do with me finally growing a spine where Will is concerned. I did this for myself. Not Will, not Allan, no one but myself."  
"So Allan-"  
"Wasn't the reason I left. That was for myself. I had been planning to go away for a while now, but after Will...I realized it would either be go away right away or possibly go mad. I admit I did want to think about what Allan might mean, but that was only because he found me." I gave a little smile. "He was upset because I didn't say goodbye."  
Djaq looked confused and I realized I hadn't told her about Allan finding me. In fact I hadn't told anyone, not even Marian. Surprisingly, it didn't bother me. I went on into the story, filling Djaq in about my grotto and being lost. I couldn't believe I was telling her all of this. The story of being lost I had never told anyone. It was true Allan, Will, and Marian knew, only because they had been trying to help find me. Yet none of them ever found out where I was or that the same place I had been lost was the same place I went to all these years later.  
That part I was planning on keeping that way. It wasn't that I didn't trust Djaq, just that I wanted to keep some parts of my life the same, and that meant keeping the location to my grotto a secret.  
"I'm sorry it took so long for someone to find you."  
I gave a little shake of my head. "I'm sorry the timing was so far off."

* * *

I stood in the courtyard watching the guards carry the chest back out here, Robin and the others following right behind. Marian and I had been standing together and both winced as the trumpets blared. It wasn't the sound, it was the fact that the Sheriff was to be ushered out and most likely this was a goodbye to the money Robin had rounded up to pay for the girl to be freed.  
"It's a birdcage." I was still in shock with the cloth down showing a swinging cage with bags of money inside. I couldn't even pay attention to Marian and Robin next to me. "Who could come up with a crazy idea like that?"  
"It was Allan's idea."  
I winced at Marian's answer. I would have to learn to stop asking questions aloud if I didn't want to know the answer. I kept listening finding out Allan was also filling the Sheriff in about the ways in and out of the castle. Apparently Marian had silenced him if he thought to betray her. I was really going to need to ask the right questions, that or spend more time in the castle. Okay, maybe the second thought would never happen. Especially with Tobias around.  
Robin and the others flew away to save John of York while Marian and I slid into the crowd. There was a bad omen around me, and I was not going to stop until I figured out where it had come from. I say bad omen because as soon as Marian and I got into a clear path we were met with Tobias. My day would just keep getting better.  
Tobias smiled seeing my face and the eyes were blissfully blank of the rest of the world. "Lady Siobhan, what a pleasure it is to see you. Do you mind if I have a word with you?"  
I felt the tips of my fingers go for a knife before I realized suddenly how scared I was. It wasn't so much I was scared of Tobias as it was of the man he had been evolving into. The leering, scary looks, forward confrontations...he was becoming reckless. The blankness in his eye told me while someone was still controlling his mouth and words there was only emptiness inside. No soul, no conscience, just a noiseless place.  
"Forgive me Sir Tobias, but I am needed in the castle." I pulled the excuse from thin air, but at least I would have Marian to back me up.  
"Just a moment of your time with a question. How is it that you know Allan-a-Dale?"  
I was taken aback. "Why-" Suddenly what Marian had told me came flashing back into memory. He was jealous. He thought something had happened between Allan and myself. While it was never a good idea to bait Tobias, a vague yet inciting answer might keep him back for a time.  
I thought carefully before speaking slowly. Trying to remember what Allan had told Gisborne days ago, I reminded myself to keep the story line basically the same. "We knew each other for a good time, as children. His mother and mine became good friends and we used to play when we would visit. After my mother died we lost contact. Times were changing and I did not travel as much because I took up her entire workload."  
"He seemed to hint there was something more."  
Just like Allan to stir up the jealousy. Yet, in a strange way he seemed to be trying to protect me from Tobias. Obviously the Sheriff had let it known we knew each other and might have hinted at the way Allan looked at me. Somewhere in Tobias' mind he believed Allan was trying to rekindle a relationship that had once been there.  
That I could work with. "We...did have feelings for each other once. Allan was the man my mother had wished me to marry."  
Marian's eyes widened, thankfully form the other side of Tobias where he couldn't see. I saw her mouth to me looking shocked. "What the hell was that?"  
Tobias narrowed his eyes. "Allan-a-Dale is your betrothed outlaw?"  
I shook my head lowering my eyes. It was getting easier and easier to lie every day. "No, he is not. He was my mother's pick, but my father had chosen someone else. My mother was a bit disappointed, but both choices were good and cared about me. Allan and I had remained friends, until we ultimately lost contact."  
They were lies, but partially true. I think if my mother had known Allan and Will at the same time her choice would have been Allan. He reminded me of her at times, or he used to at least. The singing, jokes, laughter, and his presence. His presence always made me feel safe, and that knowledge did scare me a bit when I finally realized it.  
Tobias swallowed. "And now? Now that he's back?"  
I opened my mouth, but Gisborne's arrival stopped me. He looked at the three of us before speaking. "Tobias if you would excuse me, I must ask Lady Marian to return to her rooms with the seamstress. Siobhan, after you have finished with Lady Marian there are a few requests the Sheriff wishes you to read over. I would prefer you to stay in Lady Marian's room until I summon you."  
I nodded my head, in disbelief that he would do such a thing. The Sheriff had already given me orders for embroidery. Gisborne was actually, I couldn't believe it, rescuing me.  
Gisborne nodded to Tobias taking Marian and I up the steps into the castle. He spoke low directing his attention to me, another surprise. In past even for questions posed to me, it was usually through Marian, or his attention was usually mostly on her. For once the look and words were all for me. "Siobhan, I must urge you to stay away from Tobias."  
"That, Sir Guy, I would be only too happy to comply with if it wasn't such a difficult task."  
"I do not say this is jest. Tobias had become...sick. He has been causing quite a few problems and it is getting to a point where I do not believe anything anyone says is truly reaching him. I urge you to be careful. While it may be good to have a friend like Allan around, someone who is of equal standing, it has not helped matters. Tobias has become..."  
"Infatuated with me. Yes Sir Guy, I had noticed. Thank you for the concern, and saving myself and Marian from him. Is there anyone that can control him?"  
"Right now he still listens to the Sheriff and myself."  
"And when he stops?"  
Gisborne stopped walking, leaving us in front of Marian's door. "If you both will excuse me, I need to have a word with the Sheriff. Be careful ladies."  
Marian and I watched Gisborne's retreating back. Once he was out of sight Marian turned to me in shock. "What was that?"  
"I know. I never thought he was capable of speaking to me directly without threatening my life."  
"I mean-"  
"I know what you meant. I think he just warned me Tobias may try to kill me." It took a great amount of self control not to shiver at the thought. "Let's go to your room shall we?"  
She raised a brow. "I'm more interested in knowing what the Sheriff needs from Guy."  
"Good point. Sneaking around first, fighting for my life after." I paused realizing that what I said was only partially a joke. "On second though, go sneaking first and come back for me. I think I need a nap. I really doubt I'm going to be able to sleep tonight."

* * *

"Marian, no really don't go that-" I groaned watched as she was knocked off her horse and hoisted into the air. "-way."  
I swung my legs over Fabian grabbing Marian's horse before he ran off. I was standing under her shaking my head. "I try to warn you. I spend a bit more time out here, I know where the traps are. If you would only listen."  
She shouted at me. "You should have told me beforehand."  
"Well pardon me for forgetting. It's fairly new." I readjusted the reins of both horses in my hands, now starting to smile. "Just hang in their Marian, someone should be here soon."  
She took a kick in my direction, now growing angry. "ROBIN!"  
"Yes my love?" Robin came running from the trees, grin plastered on his face. Whether the grin was because Marian was hanging in the air kicking and screaming, or simply because she was there I wasn't sure.  
"Robin, get me down!"  
"But you look so good up there!"  
"You will pay Robin of Locksley."  
"Honestly! You look gorgeous from any angle."  
Marian began to come down. Apparently Will had gone to lower the rope. As soon as she touched down she punched Robin in the stomach, doubling him over. "How do I look form that angle?"  
He wheezed giving me a hard look. "Why didn't you warn her?"  
"I tried! Not my fault no one listens to me lately."  
He winced, standing up. I wasn't sure if the wince was from the punch or my words. Either way it was true. "What was it you wanted?"  
"Listen to me I was wrong. Allan's out of control. He's leading Gisborne and his men to camp."  
I turned around eyes wide. That wasn't what Marian had told me. She told me Gisborne was sending dogs and the usual into the area, too close for comfort she had said. "Marian."  
Djaq looked at me, both of us shocked. "Allan?"  
Robin took Marian's arm to speak with her privately.  
I narrowed my eyes grabbing the horses, accompanied by John of York. "What?"  
He rose an eyebrow. "Just lending a hand."  
"Pardon me, I'm a few steps away from becoming quite irrational."  
Will came behind us, giving me a look. "Maybe you going back home is a bad idea."  
"I wasn't planning on going home. I'm going to the castle with Marian."  
"I thought you hated the castle."  
I readjusted my grip of Fabian's reigns walking away from him and in the direction of Marian and Robin. "I do, but right now it's safer to be there than home alone."  
Will reached out and touched my hand. "What happened? Is there anything I can do?"  
I shook my head, nodding John of York to hurry up and follow me. "Go back to camp Will. Trust me, you've done enough already."

* * *

I cleaned the last blade replacing it in my new bodice sheath. I stood twisting my torso around to check for visibility. "Marian, what do you think?"  
She raised her eyebrows with a smile. "I think you have a bit too much time on your hands my friend." She tilted her head to the side. "And yet, I am very impressed. I know where it is because I saw you put it in, but I can't tell."  
I twirled walking out of her room. "That my friend is the beauty of design. You accent the lining of the shirt with black ribbon and simple studding. The end result gives you a pretty top that hides your weapons. Plus you can do it to dresses to. I found it much easier for all the times I've had to dress up for you this past year. I like dresses, but they pose a bit more of a problem when i try to hide my knives. I can't keep the sheath at my back when I wear a dress, and I have been leaving my hair down, so I don't hide a knife there anymore. I don't wear the two on my upper legs much anymore because they interfere with my running lately, and the time to get them isn't much worth it."  
"So you don't carry them at all anymore? I find it hard to believe you would down grade on the number of weapons you carry."  
"I suppose you have noticed I haven't limped in a while?"  
"Yes, actually now that you mention it."  
"I moved the knives of my upper legs to my ankles for a time. The added weight caused too many problems to I moved them to my forearms. So, two on the wrists, two on the forearms, two on the ankles, one in the bodice, and one still at my back. When I wear a dress the one from my back goes up into my hair. I appreciate your value for style in your daggers, but I was never a fan of the curved blade."  
Marian shook her head with a laugh. "All right, but I've been using it so long I prefer not to change if you don't mind. Where shall we go? I cannot just stay in my room, not after finally getting out for a bit."  
"How about the kitchen? I saw a fresh batch of apples come in."  
"Apples then to see my father. I want to bring him fresh food."  
"Sounds good to me. I also have some herbs with me. Dill, ginger, marigold. All will taste good with whatever food you get, and relieve some of the stomach trouble he's been having."  
"Marian."  
We both turned around to see Gisborne coming our way, looking beat up.  
Marian opted for polite question. "What happened to you?"  
"Nothing, just an incident in the woods. How is Sir Edward?"  
"I was just on my way to see him now. I will tell him you asked after him. That's kind."  
Gisborne slowed in front of the steps that led down to kitchen storage. "Marian..." He paused looking at me. "Forgive me. Siobhan, could I have a moment with Lady Marian?"  
All this politeness in one day, it was most assuredly a record. Still, I nodded. It couldn't hurt to not give him such a hard time, especially with the change of heart toward Marian, and more recently to myself. "Of course Sir Guy. I was just headed to the kitch-"  
My eyes caught Robin grappling with Allan, pulling him back down the stairwell. Before Gisborne could turn around or ask me what was wrong I composed myself. "I apologize, my mind went away for a moment. I was saying I was just headed to grab an apple or two from the kitchen. If you'll excuse me."  
He gave a slight bow of his head, attention back on Marian. I hurried down the stairs looking over my shoulder at the look she shot me. Once in the kitchen and out of earshot I saw Robin pin Allan to the ground, dagger at his throat. "Robin!"  
Allan looked right at Robin, neither of them acknowledging me. "Please, I don't want to die."  
"Well that's too bad because it is the only way you're going to escape me."  
Marian flew past me headed for Robin. "Robin, spare him."  
He looked up, finally seeing Marian and I there. "I can't."  
Marian knelt by them, hand on Robin's shoulder. "Robin listen. Do it for me. Do it for Siobhan."  
"Marian, I'm doing this for you. Both of you. To protect you."  
She grabbed his face in her hands forcing him to look into her eyes. "Robin, no. Please, if you love me you will let him go."  
"I do love you, and that is why I cannot let him live. Because one day he'll do something to take you away from me."  
I fell to my knees a few feet from them. "Please. Robin, don't kill him. He would never hurt Marian." I let my voice drop to a whisper. "You read his letter."  
Allan swallowed, still at point of the dagger. "I wouldn't. I swear it."  
Marian leaned in. "Robin, please. Don't taint us with his blood."  
Robin stared at he, finally leaning back.  
Marian push him forward making him stumble in my general direction. She flicked the knife that moment ago was at his throat into the bag next to his face. "You owe me your life. Don't you _ever_ betray me."  
He looked over at her. "I won't." Over the view of the knife he looked into my face. "Ever."  
My chest clenched a little tighter as he stumbled past me, fingers brushing my own as he went up the stairs.  
I cleared my throat grabbing a few apples from the crate, putting most in my bag, but keeping one spinning in my hands. "I'm just going to go then. Marian, I'll be in your room. Robin..." I nodded to him and flew up the staircase.  
I don't know why, but the days were getting longer, and none less stressful.

* * *

I opened the door, faced with Allan looking stricken. "What's wrong?"  
He met my face then looked past me toward Marian. "Marian, you're needed outside. Sir Edward...he's been killed. Guy told me to bring out to the courtyard."  
"What?" She flew past both of us, hurrying outside.  
My eyes grew wide. "Allan?"  
"Siobhan, he was killed. I...I'm sorry. They found him next to the Canon's body." He lowered his voice, grabbing my arm before I went after her. "Siobhan, I say this is seriousness. Convince Marian to go into the forest. The dagger she wears in her hair? Edward killed his guard with it. The Sheriff isn't going to be too happy about this. I don't want Marian hurt. I'm sure Robin will tell her the same thing but..."  
I nodded and ran after Marian.  
I found her hitting Gisborne screeching for an explanation. She took off back to the castle and I grabbed Gisborne's arm. "Sir Guy, please. Don't go after her. Let her go."  
"I appreciate your concern, but Marian's in danger." He took off after her and I groaned.  
I ran back up the stairwell and Allan held up his hands. "Siobhan, one moment. I swear just let him talk to her for one moment before you go after her."  
"Allan she..."  
He lowered his voice, moving closer. "I saw Robin go in. Just go to her, pretend to put her to bed, then get the hell out of here. I'll do all I can to keep Gisborne away for as long as I can, but you know if Marian goes to the forest your cottage will be the first place Gisborne looks."  
I shut my eyes putting a hand against Allan's cheek. "Some times I cannot believe how much I appreciate you even though you're gone."  
He ran his fingers down my arm. "I'm not gone Siobhan. I'm right here. I'll always be here if you need me."  
Gisborne came forward looking between us. "Siobhan, you should return to your cottage. Marian needs her rest."  
I quickly dropped my hand from Allan's face, feeling uneasy. "I will Sir Guy. I just...I lost both my parents and I want to be there for her. I just want to settle her into bed." I saw Allan nod for me to continue over Gisborne's shoulder. "I would advise to leave her alone for the rest of the night. Please, if nothing else listen to me on this."  
He nodded, eyes to the floor as he walked away. I mouthed a thank you to Allan who simply nodded and went after Gisborne.  
I opened the door to Marian's room, closing it quickly as I found Robin embracing her. "Gisborne will stay away for the rest of the night. Allan will keep him away for as long as he can tomorrow, but you need to move to the forest as soon as possible." I lifted the bag that had been left for an emergency and pulled it over my shoulder.  
Marian ran to me holding me tight. "I love you Siobhan. If I had ever had a sister I hope she would have been just like you." She cried harder into my shoulder. "You will always be my best friend, and closer than a sister to me."  
I closed my eyes handing her back to Robin. "Be safe. I'll deliver the bag as soon as I get out of the castle."  
Marian's eyes widened turning back to me. "Siobhan, will you be okay with Tobias-"  
I held up a hand. "Don't worry about me, just get to the camp."  
Robin moved forward. "Tobias...Siobhan come with us."  
"No, listen if I walk out of the room, then they will know I went and believe you to still be in there. If I'm in here when they realize Marian is gone, things will be made worse. Fabian is outside. I can just ride him back. He's faster than any horse within the castle. i swear I'll be fine. I'll meet you at the camp for the wedding. Then straight home for me."

* * *

It was a lovely wedding and the words were nice. With every ending there would be a new beginning. The way things had always been and would always be.  
Robin turned to me as John and Beatrice gave everyone a hug. "You never stay this quite. No blessing? I'm shocked."  
I laughed coming forward. "I didn't realize we both stood in as priests. We have our own Church of the Outlaw now do we?"  
Robin rolled his eyes waving his hand toward me. "Go on. With all of your speeches you seem to be on your way to becoming a bishop."  
I gave him a nod. "Well as a matter of fact I do know of one." As everyone gave me their attention I held my hands at my sids palms up.  
"_May God be with you and bless you.  
May you see your children's children.  
May you be poor in misfortune, rich in blessings.  
May you know nothing but happiness  
From this day forward._"  
I watched as Marian slid her hand into Robin's. "Beautiful."  
John and Beatrice said their goodbyes, laughing as Much gave them a toasting fork.  
I leaned against Little John's arm watching as they rode off. I lifted my head up remembering something. "Hey Will-"  
I was stopped by the clanging of the alarm in the camp.  
We all turned staring at Will. He waited a moment then dropped his bowl of flowers running forward. Everyone ran close behind, Djaq and I lagging in the back laughing too hard to breathe.  
"Some things will never change."

* * *

I looked out my window and swore beneath my breath. When Marian had left with Robin I had run out of the castle to my cottage, trying to figure out what to do. It was only a matter of time before Gisborne found out and completely lost his mind. Seriously, Robin had been a bit over dramatic breaking the window, but I understood the rush. However, with Marian out of the castle and in deep grief it was only time before he would think to look at my cottage.  
Surprisingly he didn't break down the door the same day she left. He probably believed she was avoiding him, but here we were the next morning with guards going throughout the town searching cottages. Not that I had anything to hide, but I had a feeling, I was going to be granted a personal visit. I turned back to my table full of folded clothes trying to think of a way to bribe a guard not to destroy my cottage with his search.  
When the door burst open I found out, not only was I wrong, but I would have been better with Gisborne. Tobias strode into the room, eyes fixed on me. Suddenly I was so very cold. The look in his eyes wasn't the normal leering. It was dark, cold, and completely deranged. Like the look of a wild animal looking through a man's eyes. I was in more trouble than I could imagine. He pushed past me looking into my bedroom and around the furniture. An evil smile came across his face as he overturned my table and stalked closer to me.  
"You are overstepping your bounds sir." My hand went for a knife, but I was too late.  
Tobias lunged at me, gripping my wrists at the point where, not only could I not reach for a knife, but the pressure to my sheaths digging into my skin made my fingers grow numb.  
He threw me to the ground, quickly following, keeping his weight on top of me so I couldn't move. With his free hand he gripped my face smile growing wider.  
It was in that moment I realized he couldn't hear me. His mind was so far gone at that moment that he couldn't comprehend a word I said. I couldn't fight back and that left one choice.  
I started screaming so loud I was hurting my own ears.  
Tobias gripped my throat with his free hand, mainly silencing my yells. "No one is coming to save you. You can't get your little knives, and I'm here on an important matter. I can't be hurt. I can't, but you can. Even though you seem so tough and hard you are fragile underneath. I want to break you. I want to see how long you last."  
I wordlessly opened my mouth, then heard a noise at the front door.  
I swear to the goddess, I don't think his feet properly touched ground. My eyes had found Allan come into my doorway. A moment later he ripped Tobias off of me, pinning him against the wall, knife pressing into his throat.  
Allan was so rigid I wasn't sure if he was breathing. His eyes were harsh, nostrils flared. As I stood leaning against the table, Allan's eyes flicked to me. I was shaking, but managed to stand up straight gripping the back of one of my chairs.  
He seemed to empty his lungs of a year's long breath. "Siobhan, how badly are you hurt?"  
I shook my head moving a bit closer to him. "Just a bit bruised. Allan, please just get rid of him."  
Allan turned back to Tobias, teeth clenched. "It would be my pleasure."  
I saw the thoughts behind his eyes and touched his arm gently. "You will not kill him."  
Allan growled pressing the knife closer to the skin beneath Tobias' throat. "Why should he live?"  
"Because I don't want him dead."  
Both mean looked surprised, eyes on me. Tobias' eyes while still wide, had become a bit frightened with Allan pressed against him. I couldn't blame him. Allan looked so angry I wouldn't had been surprised if he had run Tobias through when he first entered the house.  
I moved my hand to the spot just above Allan's elbow, gripping him slightly. "I don't want you to have an unneeded murder over your head."  
"I think this is needed."  
"Allan kill for self defense, not my honor."  
"I do not want you hurt. I am not going to fight your battles, but I will always defend you. I cannot just stand aside in a matter like this. You know what he intended." He met my eyes trying to figure out if I really did understand him.  
I paused. I did know what Tobias had intended. He would have raped me and most likely killed me when I found a way to fight back. "Allan, if you respect me at all you will let him go. We do not need any more enemies." I paused. "It may be a bit late for that, but I will not let you have an unnecessary kill on your conscience. Please, send him on his way." I paused looking for a way to keep Tobias away. "Send him on his way and stay with me here."  
His eyes searched my face and he loosened his grip on Tobias. He turned his full attention on Tobias, one hand behind him so he knew where I was, protecting me. "Go back outside. Don't even think about trying to come back in here. I will kill you if you do."  
Tobias spoke calmly, but his eyes betrayed him. "You do not have it in you. You cannot just kill me. Add that to the fact of what Guy would do to you."  
Allan shook his head with a smile. "You have no idea how easily I could. I refuse to let you hurt Siobhan. If protecting her means killing you so be it. As for Guy, he's growing very tired of you. You're becoming so very reckless, and even the Sheriff doesn't need your family's money anymore. Fight me. Have Guy choose a side. We will see how it ends."  
Allan finished his speech stepping back, lowering his sword, but didn't put it away. His free hand reached around to keep me behind him, just incase Tobias did try to run at me again. Instead I slipped my hand into his, surprising both of us. His eyes met mine, but he said nothing.  
Turning back to Tobias he pointed out the door with his sword. "Go."  
Tobias stared at us, unable to hide the fury on his face. Yet, he did leave. He walked out pushing two guards that had been watching from the door.  
As soon as he was out of the cottage I began to shake uncontrollably. I was gulping air fast and realized I was in shock. With Tobias out the door it set in what had just happened.  
Allan grabbed me and held me tightly against him trying to keep me still. He stroked my back, speaking into my hair. "Siobhan, it's okay. I'm here. I'm here for you."  
I started to slow my breathing, face planted into his shoulder my fingers twining together behind his back. "I cannot believe. I...I..." I pulled my head back finally looking Allan in the face. "What are you doing here?"  
He blinked confused. "I didn't want to leave you here alone while Tobias is still around."  
I shook my head. "No, I meant what brought you to my cottage?"  
"I tried to beat Tobias here. Guy is losing his mind with Marian gone. He sent a group to go into Locksley and within the castle to find her. I knew Tobias would try to find you. I wasn't going to let him get you. I'm trying to redeem myself Siobhan. I'm trying to show you that there is still part of the Allan you used to know inside. I won't leave until you want me to."  
I nodded and turned my head to the noise that was rising outside. "What's going on?"  
Allan shook his head, holding me around the waist with his left arm, holding his sword tightly as he led us to the door.  
Gisborne was getting off his horse listening to whatever Tobias was saying. His eyes scanned over to find Allan and I in the front door.  
Allan turned to be giving me a quick squeeze. "Stay here." Allan let go of me, walking to meet Gisborne before he came into the house. He put up his sword, but kept a hand on the hilt. His voice was low, "Guy, we need to talk."  
Gisborne sighed. "What did he do?"  
Allan blinked. "What?"  
"Tobias is always causing problems. Too many problems lately. What did he do?"  
Allan said something too low for me to hear. He flexed his hands giving a small motion behind him toward where I was waiting for him.  
Gisborne stilled and his eyes went suddenly dark. He looked up to me and walked over, Allan looking a bit worried following right behind. "Siobhan, I ask you one question. Only once. Where is Marian?"  
My arms were locked around myself and I shook my head. "Sir Guy, I do not know. She had fallen asleep a short while after getting back to her rooms. She cried herself to sleep. I didn't want to leave her, but she asked for some time to herself. I know what she's going through. She needs to sort things out herself. I do not know where she is right now, I swear."  
Which was true. At the moment I didn't know if she was in one of the other villages or at the camp. Strangely, I was a bit happy I wasn't lying to him. I wasn't sure if it was because he looked so broken, or knowing he was my current lifeline.  
Gisborne nodded. "Thank you."  
Tobias moved forward, eyes growing wild again. "You cannot just let her walk away without punishment. She's a liar and a whore."  
He was spitting the last words, reminding me of dogs that had gone insane and foamed at the mouth. Looking at his face I don't believe my comparison was that far off.  
Allan turned punching Tobias in the face, knocking him to the ground. "Don't you ever speak to her like that. What do you even know about her?"  
Tobias put a hand to his lip coming back with a bit of blood. "She's headstrong. She plays with affections. She never listens. She just as much trouble as the damned Marian we're searching for. We're all better off without them. Lying whores, both of them."  
There are may times in life where time slows down. This was not one of them. In a flash it all happened. This would be in my mind until the day I died.  
Gisborne turned on Tobias and slid his sword through Tobias' stomach. Forcing him into the ground he shoved the sword further in, clenching his teeth. "If I could have ever respected you this would have gone through your heart for a swift death. You have cause problem after problem in the castle. I've turned the Sheriff's eye away from you too many times. You go after a castle appointed seamstress and follow her around with malicious intent. You hit her, follow her around, and speak your mind too often. Now you're speaking ill of the one person I believe makes this whole place livable. So I'm going to watch you die."  
With that he struck the sword into the ground watching as Tobias wildly grabbed at the hilt lodged in his stomach. Everyone stood there in silence for a few minutes.  
Allan came to stand by me, unsure of what I was about to do. I walked forward sliding my hand into his. Together we watched as Gisborne slowly withdrew his sword from Tobias' now silent body. Gisborne motioned his guards to take the body away, before getting on his own horse with a nod toward Allan and myself.  
Allan looked down at where my hand was in his own. It had felt like forever since we had been like this. It was funny how my hand fit in his. He moved his palm so his fingers enveloped my own, squeezing them gently.  
I finally looked back up at him. "Thank you."  
He gave me a small smile. "I meant what I've been saying. I'm trying to be there for you as much as you will let me."  
I tilted my head to the side staring at him. "I want us to stay like this. I want us to be friends at the least again. You should feel welcome here. Saving me from...the worst possible situations.  
Allan's eyes crossed my face quickly. "Siobhan, is this some test or trick? I'm a bit confused on how to respond to your statement."  
I shook my head with a smile looking down, watching our hands from the corner of my eye. "I am not testing you. I don't want to fight, I want for us to be friends again. I want my house to be welcome to you. This should be a neutral ground. You've helped me twice now since...since you've been away from camp. No matter what the others think of you, the opposed views, you are trying hard to redeem yourself in my eyes. That is enough for me. Saving me is enough." I leaned forward giving his cheek a kiss.  
Allan watched me carefully as I leaned back. "So, where do we stand now?"  
"We're friends."  
"Friends?"  
I felt my lips twitch. "Allan, this is a start over. We're not going immediately back to how we were before. How we were starting to be I mean."  
He nodded leaning against the doorway still holding my hand. "How we could be again?"  
I looked him over. "Possibly. With time."  
He gave a slight tug on my hand making me fall forward. "Really?"  
"I said with time Allan." I gave myself a mental cheer of congratulations for keeping my voice from shaking. I had forgotten how hard it was to go against those incredibly blue eyes. And being this close.  
"Just seeing what you'll allow."  
I shook my head pushing back. "Go home Allan. Don't push your luck. I'm vulnerable right now, and not in a good way."  
He gave a nod, turning serious again. "Are you sure you don't want to stay in the castle tonight?"  
"I'd rather not. Gisborne was being courteous about not yelling at me because of whatever you told him. I would rather not try my luck being in the castle."  
Allan nodded. He gave me a swift kiss on the forehead and hurried outside.  
I leaned against the doorway watching him ride off with a smile. Incorrigible. Simply incorrigible.

* * *

**A/N:  
My life is full of fun rides. Like ones to JFK Intl and then running around on the AirTran to get to the right terminal before the friend we were surprising left. Because naturally he ended up getting an earlier flight. All that matters is that I got to nap in the back of the truck when we were parked in front of his house and my friends went for a walk.  
I don't suffer from insomnia, I enjoy the after effects. Finally passing out and falling into delreious dreams with good looking men and Scottish brogues. Although the last dream had to do with Allan, Will, and a wedding. Yeah, I think that's a hint I either need to not fall asleep with certain songs on my iPod or I'm frustrating relationship wise.  
I'm going to pretend it's my iPod.  
Super updating girl to the rescue.  
Seriously, how much do you love me right now?  
On to my thank yous:  
gostcat: I've always had a soft spot for Allan. He reminds me of every guy I grew up with rolled into one. Dangerous, but oh so fun. And of course sarcastic as hell.  
Cowgirl: Am I getting good at this? I didn't think the last chapter was as bad as five. Five was really bad. I think I still love chapter four though...Anyway, who doesn't deserve a slap? My best friend is starting to remind me a bit too much of Will. I hadn't based the character on him, but slowly my best friend is starting to act like Will, so I suppose he's first on my 'to slap' list. I hope this is happy enough. I promise there are better ones to come. It's just this is where it's a bit hard to write very happy. The whole bad Allan transition is a bit difficult to explain.  
Instantstar15: That was a good way of looking at it. I was just interested seeing someone else's view on who else it might be. I figured anyone who didn't think it was Allan would think it would be Robin. I love new chapter too, don't worry we all jump when a story we love is updated. I'm trying to move faster on this to catch up with the episodes, but I don't think I'll make it unless a miracle happens. I used to only write for movies, but then I did a fic for The Black Donnelley's and found how much fun I can have re-doing a TV show from a different view. I might be a bit obsessed...Yes, my poor Siobhan, I seem to be putting her through hell. It seems whenever I writ something bad happening to her something bad happens here in my reality. So I'm hoping writing a bit of good will transfer over to me because this is getting ridiculous. As for the third season, I'm a bit skeptical. I know it's coming in August and while I am excited, I'm a bit scared. I think I figured a way to end this story season without causing problems if I decide to continue for season 3. Depending on how season 3 goes, will depend if I do a third story. I'd love to do another, but I don't want to really mess it up. We will just have to see. And I love long reviews, keep them coming! Cheers.**


	8. A New Face and Complications

**Disclaimer: I own nothing besides my own characters. Nothing else. That all belongs to the creators of Robin Hood and BBC.  
Lucky bastards.**

* * *

I leaned against the wall watching Allan sleep. It was too amusing and I admit, rather adorable. He was slumped against the wall, arms crossed, mouth slightly open. He looked so peaceful, I was forced to bother him.  
I took a spring of lavender from my pocket and traced it along his nose.  
He twitched slightly, but just licked his lips, still asleep.  
I frowned, trying to think of another way to wake him up without shaking him. I smiled and leaned over blowing in his ear. Boredom made me extraordinarily childish.  
"You know, you are making this whole 'friends' thing a bit difficult."  
I lifted my head in surprise watching as Allan grinned at me. "You were awake this whole time?"  
"You're the only person I know that carries lavender. I could smell it. So to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?"  
I hopped up in the alcove next to him. "I'm lonely. Robin and the others are off somewhere, and I'm ahead of schedule on all my work. Since Marian's been gone and I don't have to worry about running from Tobias I have no distractions."  
Allan looked me over carefully. "Do the others know about Tobias?"  
I crossed my legs at the ankles, not meeting his eyes. "They know he's dead. Marian told Robin about the conversation with Gisborne and he wasn't too thrilled. I told him Gisborne killed Tobias. I wanted to tell them more but..."  
"But you want to be careful about how you present it." He nodded. "That's completely understandable. It's not something you can just bring up."  
"Allan, don't say it like that. You know how thankful I am. I just...Robin's just started talking to me normally again. I want to tread carefully. I can't have everyone cut me out. It was bad enough before...Only Djaq would talk to me without trying to lecture me."  
He sighed. "I know. I'm sorry I said it that way, it's just I feel if you can even partially forgive me the rest of them should find it much easier. I just want Robin to believe I don't want any of them hurt. I still believe in everything he stands for. You have it harder than I do, still being around them and all. For that I am sorry." He gave a laugh adjusting himself, sensing my discomfort at the subject. "So how far ahead are you in your work?"  
I blinked. "Allan. I finished all the work I had, added designs to clothes I didn't need to, added the ties to Djaq's wardrobe I had promised, and started working on the dress I said I was making for my birthday."  
He rose a brow. "Really? Isn't that a bit early?"  
I sighed resting my head against the wall. "It is turning out to be much more extravagant that I think I ever made for myself. Possibly anyone. It's probably a waste of fabric, but it's so beautiful. The fabric, oh you have no idea. Rafael had surprised me with it a while back and I've been saving it. I lined the inside with some of the silk the Count sent. It's..." My voice drifted off picture the dress I was starting. I always said I wanted to be buried in my mother's wedding dress, but this dress was coming as a close second.  
Allan suddenly jumped up and peaked around the corner. "Siobhan, hide."  
"What?"  
He pushed me around the other side of the alcove, behind a door. "Guy is coming and he's been in a bit of a mood since Marian left. He's still trying to figure out why she left without leaving word. So him seeing you might..."  
"Got it." I snuck behind the door watching from a crack at the argument that was about to ensue.  
Apparently Allan had gone back to pretending he had been asleep again. Gisborne began yelling at Allan to 'earn his keep'. Apparently that was by finding Marian, which was amusing since the Sheriff was in good spirits with her gone. Two men on the same side and neither ever seemed happy at the same time. Amazing how ironic life could be.  
"Ask around. Go talk to your girl. She's bound to hear something by now. It's been too long for Marian not to have sent word. Annoy her as much as she annoys the rest of us." He leaned in close, voice a calculated growl. "Earn your keep."  
I heard Gisborne walk away and waited a minute before coming out from the door. I rose a brow at Allan crossing my arms. "So am I your girl now? What gives you that privilege?"  
He tilted my chin up with a finger, leaning in close. "Well, I do have a tendency of defending your honor, saving your life, and making you blush."  
I narrowed my eyes. "I am not blushing."  
"But I can make you blush."  
I knew better than to argue that point. "How does that make me your girl?"  
He dropped his hand. "It doesn't. But apparently the fact I'm the only one in the castle you talk to without pulling a knife out on, or simply wanting to, makes Guy think you're mine."  
"What makes you think I don't want to pull my knife on you?"  
He smiled moving closer to me, knowing full well this was making me uncomfortable. "I know you. When you want to stab someone your fingers twitch, just to have something to do. That and you've had the perfect opportunities to pull it on me already. You wouldn't bother holding back on my account."  
My back hit the wall behind me, and I had to change the subject. "Shouldn't you be trying to find Marian? I don't think bothering me is earning your keep."  
He sighed. "Yeah, well I know where she is. I just don't know how to 'find' her."  
"We need to figure out a good lie."  
He smiled. "So now it's 'we' is it?"  
"As in you, Marian, and myself. Allan, I meant what I said by friendship."  
"You gave Will a second chance to court you, that wasn't just 'friends'."  
"That's different." I searched my mind to back up my statement. I came up with nothing.  
"Sounds like a double standard to me."  
"Have you thought maybe I don't want to ruin things again?"  
We both fell in silence. Even I blinked at my own words. That was an impulsive response. I hadn't even known I was thinking that. Apparently my subconscious had been busy.  
"I should go find Marian. Talk to her I mean. Something."  
I nodded, stepping back. "There's an abby not far off. We, sorry, you could say she's there."  
He nodded, getting the idea. "Have her write a letter, all that sort of stuff." He rubbed the back of his neck looking at me. "Will you come with me? There's less of a chance someone will kill me with you there. I want to get the message across before someone tries to stab me."  
"It's the least I could do."

* * *

I stared at Marian as she threw another knife into the tree. "Marian, you're already skilled at the bow and rather good with a sword. You're not bad with a dagger, but I think you can leave the knife throwing skills with me. We don't want you too comfortable with multiple weapons."  
She rolled her eyes then turned in a flash hearing a twig snap behind her.  
I winced pinching the bridge of my nose at Allan stared at shock toward the knife Marian had just thrown into the tree. "You could have had my eye out!"  
"You've got some nerve showing your face in the forest." She paused turning to me. "Oh, please tell me you didn't."  
I held up my hands. "Listen we have an issue, and it isn't just about you. I don't mind putting my arse on the line for you, but if there are alternatives I'd like to take them thank you."  
Allan came from the trees. "Give us some credit. We checked to make sure you were alone first. Can't think of what the lads might do to me if they were given half the chance." He gave a shake of his head and went on. "Gisborne sent me to find you. I found you, but I obviously can't tell him you're here."  
Marian nodded. "Obviously."  
"Siobhan and I-"  
"Oh Siobhan and you?" Marian turned to me with a raised brow. "Really?"  
I held up a hand. "Marian. Shut it for a moment and let him finish. I want you to be happy and not harassed, which means staying in the forest without having Gisborne sends dogs to try and find your scent. It also means having him leave me alone. Allan's been helping me so I am in turn helping him. Just give a listen, all right?"  
She folded her arms and nodded, pulling the knives out of the tree. "All right."  
Allan went on. "I need to tell him something. I was thinking I could tell him you joined up with the Sisters of the Immaculate Conception over at Ripley convent."  
"Will he believe that?"  
"Yeah. Well I was thinking you could write a note, saying you want to be left alone. Bit of praying, grieving, whatever."  
"Why would you help me?"  
"Look, I'm not all bad. I'm trying to prove it." I noticed his eyes flicked to me for a moment after that statement.  
Marian seemed to think about this. "Any letters from the convent have to be sealed by the mother superior."  
Allan shrugged. "I can get that."  
I was taken aback. "How?"  
He smiled. "I'm good with nuns."  
I held up my hands. "I don't think I even want to know." Just come here so she can write a letter up quickly. Marian, if you have time write a short one to me. I think Gisborne will find it a bit odd if you only write something to him, and not to me."  
She nodded taking the parchment and quill I handed her, then quickly sat down and began writing whatever would convince Gisborne to leave her alone.  
I leaned against a tree watching Allan. "They travel along north road every day for exercise, and to drop off some food to the hungry. I could meet you back at my cottage to get the letter."  
Allan just shook his head. "Stay here with Marian. Just in case Guy has a blowout I don't want you to get involved. Plus it might be better if he eventually asks you about a letter."  
Marian stood giving him two letters. "Keep Siobhan's with you. Instead of having him look for you say that she gave you hers. It's much easier this way."  
Allan took the letter from her and turned to me. "Will you be back at your cottage later?"  
I nodded. "I'll be there if anything goes wrong. Good luck Allan."  
We watched him run off toward the North Road. I was curious how he was going to get the seal, but after thinking, it was probably better that I didn't know.  
Marian turned looking at me carefully. "So you and Allan are friends again?"  
"Marian, I'm not a child. I can make my own choices. Allan did...he did something for me I can't just ignore. So yes we're friends. I can't just..." I shook my head walking with her back to camp. It was hard to explain something she didn't want to listen to or understand. "I can't just ignore him. I won't turn my back on him."  
"Have you told Robin?"  
I gave her a look. "He's only just started talking to me, and the main reason for that is your presence. Don't try to deny it, I know you're the one who told him how much I hate the way he had been treating me. I cannot just jump up and say 'Oh by the way Robin, Allan and I are trying to repair our friendship. You should be happy even though you hate his guts and probably mine after this news.' Good idea Marian."  
"No need to be so catty."  
"I like being able to talk to Robin again without the sideway looks. I know nothing is going to go back to how it was perfectly, but it won't kill us all to try to at least be able to talk to each other again. You and the others tried telling me it was all for the best. Robin mainly didn't comment because he knew I would hate it. Djaq at least showed sympathy because she knew I couldn't just forget him. I'm not saying what he did was right, but we've learned not every situation is what it appears to be. Think about Harold, the Count, any number of the people we've helped. It's all there. I'm sorry if I seem to be going off on a tangent, but I refuse to just sit aside and let everyone else take over. While you were still in the castle I was at least needed. I could freely come and go sending word when no one else would have been able to get in. Now what does Robin even need me for? You got away with more than I would ever be able to because Gisborne fancied, well still fancies, you. I'm not exactly a favorite, and we've learned no one is bothered by locking me up. Lately I've been thinking maybe Dan was right. Maybe I should just move on. I have enough money and someone is bound to need a seamstress or midwife. I can do either, I have the skill."  
"Siobhan, maybe you should have waited to tell me in person rather than complain to the trees."  
I winced turning around. "Robin, always a pleasure. Maybe you could, I don't know, snap a few twigs or shout so I know you're coming." I looked to his side where a light haired man was standing. "Making new friends are we Robin?"  
He noticed my change of subject, but surprisingly let it go. For now anyway. Either way I was quite thankful. "Siobhan, this is Carter. His brother fought with us in the Holy Land. Also he took a contract from the Sheriff to kill me."  
"You do lead such an interesting life. Carter, a pleasure."  
He smiled. "You're the one with the knives?"  
"Come now Robin, you know I hate it when you tell my trade secrets." I looked back at Carter with a smile. If Robin was letting me change subjects I'd take it as far as I possibly could. "If you can tell me how many knives I carry I will really truly be impressed."  
"That I can do." He walked closer, and did a full circle around me. "One on each ankle. One on each wrist. If you're also as intelligent as I've heard on the way here you have two that are well hidden. I'll guess one at your lower back. The other I'm not too sure of yet." He gave me a wide smile. "Am I close?"  
I raised a brow. "Quite actually. Since you're doing so well, I'll even let you in on a secret I carry eight on my person. All are on me right now."  
The others had gathered now. It was always interesting to see someone new interact with those not officially in the gang. Plus Carter was quite interesting. He wasn't as Harold had been, plagued with memories of war. In fact he reminded me a bit of Robin with how he presented himself. Except for the fact Robin didn't look at me the way Carter was. Goodie. Though lately any look that didn't seem as if the individual wanted to watch me die by his hand was a safe look in my book. Maybe it would be safer if I generally stayed away from men as long as I could possibly help it.  
Carter took another look. "Your sleeves are wider than what I usually see. You wear one on each forearm I believe. That or just above our elbow. That gives me seven." He looked me over again carefully. It wasn't a leer, and it wasn't longing either. He was taking this very seriously. "The last knife...your hair is down that would have been my guess. I congratulate you. You've stumped me."  
I laughed holding my hand out to him. "I congratulate you. No one ever gets that many. You are partially right on the last knife though. When my hair is up or in a braid I hide it there."  
Much looked at me with a frown. "Well where is it?"  
"My dear Much, if I revealed all of my secrets where would I find fun?" I turned to Robin. "So what is new in the world of Robin Hood?"  
"Carter here, was sent to retrieve the pact, along with killing me. So we're going to help him fulfill his job by sending him back to town with the pact and a dead me." He turned to Marian. "I don't suppose anything happened while I was gone?"  
"Allan was here."  
"Allan?"  
"Gisborne sent him to find me.  
John's fists clenched. "I'll kill him."  
Marian rolled her eyes. "No, no. He came to help. He sent Gisborne a letter saying I'm at Ripley Convent. That should keep trouble away for a time."  
Robin met my eyes over her head. "Really?"  
Djaq came forward clutching a small vial. "It's ready Robin, but it is dangerous."  
He gave a laugh. "Isn't everything we do?" He turned jabbing at John. "What is it you say John? Today's a good day to die!"  
I watched Djaq pour the potion into his mouth and shook my head. "Saying it doesn't bother me as much as the fact you laugh when you say it. That my friend is worrisome."  
"Don't worry Siobhan. I don't plan on actually dying today. It seems we have some things to discuss first." With that he lay down, closing his eyes.  
Unfortunately I knew for a fact that the discussion I was dreading would be fast approaching.

* * *

I walked out of the camp seeing the others laughing coming my way. "Goodie. Everyone seems to be alive. I'll just-crap."  
Robin made a beeline for me with a forced smile. "I think we'll be having that talk now."  
"Robin." I gave him my tired look. "Must we?"  
He gave me a stern look, and pulled me along. The others lagged behind slightly to give us room. Thankfully Djaq was keeping them at a distance far enough I knew they wouldn't be able to hear us. Good. If I had to have this conversation than I was glad this is the way it would be.  
"Siobhan, speak."  
"I'm not a dog Robin. You have to tell me what I'm suppose to be speaking about. And how much you heard."  
"Enough to understand you don't think you're valuable at all."  
Thank the goddess. This conversation would be so much easier than if it was about Allan. "I see. Well, it's true. You've only just started talking to me again, and that's only by Marian's word. Don't try to deny it. You've been avoiding having a one on one conversation since the whole Allan incident."  
He gave a forced laugh. "The 'Allan incident'? That's a very diplomatic way of presenting it."  
I shrugged my shoulders. "If you want to fight about it, fine. Leave me out of it. I will not take part in it."  
Robin grabbed my arm forcing me to look at him. "I know you cared about him Siobhan. I know you did. That doesn't change what he did."  
"Maybe the other things he has done do change."  
"Siobhan, nothing he could have done will change what he did."  
"Not even saving a life?"  
"Siobhan, you say saving a life as if this has already happened. Yes, I admit helping Marian means a lot to me, but that does not mean he saved her life."  
I pulled my arm from his hand. "Believe it or not, I'm not speaking about Marian."  
"I've never known you to be in a problem you couldn't get out of."  
"I'm human Robin. We all make mistakes. We all get hurt."  
"We all get hurt, yes. Though some of us put more effort into getting hurt than others."  
I went cold. My body felt like stone and breathing wasn't coming too easy. "Setting up for hurt? I admit that sometimes I do set myself up for hurt, but I don't think I have ever purposely set myself up to be hurt to the extend of being raped and killed."  
"What?" Robin's eyes were wide staring at me.  
The others had caught up with us and I knew they had heard the last part. It was obvious by the looks of confusion and shock on their faces.  
"Well since you feel the need to pick a fight you might as well know what really happened when Gisborne killed Tobias. Gisborne sent his troops out to find Marian. He's so far in love with her he goes slightly crazy. Tobias reached my cottage before anyone else could get to it. He was going mad. He grabbed my wrists and pinned me to the ground. I couldn't get my knives and he slammed me down so hard I couldn't move. His eyes were wild, but he couldn't see me. I know that look Robin. It's the look of a starved crazy man. He was set to rape and kill me. He was choking me and Allan came in. He ripped Tobias off of me. He saved my life. He wasn't the one to kill Tobias because I told him not to. It's one thing to shed blood when you need to, it's another for revenge. We all know that lesson. Of course that would just mean you are right Robin. Everything I do is my fault. I should have just let Tobias kill me instead of struggling."  
I knew I was going too far but I was on a roll and no one was stopping me. "Allan is still keeping me safe from Gisborne who is still angry with Marian gone. Allan has been keeping him from dragging me out of my house to figure out where Marian is. Allan saved me when I couldn't save myself. That might not be enough for you to forgive him or even lay up on the hate speeches, but it is enough for me. I don't forget people who take care of me. That doesn't mean he places higher than the rest of you because you've all helped me in your own way, but it means does in fact place."  
I crossed my arms looking around at everyone. Djaq looked apologetic, and everyone else was pretty much too shocked for any other type of emotion. Better yet, I had rendered Robin speechless. A small victory, but I would take that. Always a nice thing. I didn't get to surprise him often so when I did it was always a pleasant surprise.  
Marian had just appeared behind the others looking around. Apparently she wasn't with them in the hay wagon they had escaped from."What happened?"  
I gave a laugh and shake of my head. "Nothing at all. Everyone, always a pleasure. Carter I wish you luck back in the Holy Land. It truly was delightful meeting you."

* * *

There was a knocking on the front door and I considered whether or not to open it. On one hand I wanted everyone to simply tell me how awful a person they thought I was to my face. On the other hand I didn't want to hear it. Sitting here debating whether or not to open the door wasn't doing any good. Either I was going to open it, or with my luck lately someone else would. I would have to ask Will if he would fix the door. Of course maybe I would have to wait until he and the others were ready to talk to me again.  
I finally got up to open the door and froze seeing the person on the other side."Carter?"  
He gave me a smile holding the reins to his horse. "Robin gave me directions."  
"Why?"  
"Because I told him I wanted to talk to you before I left."  
I watched with a frown as he tied the reins for his horse to the post in front of my cottage. I had made John put it in a few weeks ago when I realized my cottage seemed to be the place the gang would hold the horses they seemed to borrow all the time.  
Once he straightened I cut him off before he could say anything I didn't want to hear. "If Robin has enlisted you to help prove I am wrong in my opinion, despite what I have heard of your fighting skills I think I'll take my chances."  
Carter gave me a slight smile and mirrored my position on the other side of the door frame. "I promise it won't take long. I just wanted to say I respect you standing up for something that apparently means a lot to you."  
"Well I suppose that makes two people who don't think I'm foolish for this."  
"It seems to me that Djaq is on your side."  
I leaned against my doorframe nodding my head. "I was counting Djaq."  
"So this Allan you are standing up for doesn't count?"  
"Allan doesn't understand why I'm working so hard on all of this. Seeing as the two sides of the fight are Allan and Robin, I am not quite sure he counts as on my side." I sighed. "Allan knows I'm taking everything carefully because I can't just distance myself from everyone. I appreciate that, but he still doesn't comprehend that the others aren't going to take it easy on him even though he's protecting Marian and saving me."  
"You don't strike me as the kind of girl that needs saving often."  
"I don't like putting myself in that position so you would be right." I blinked realizing I was having this conversation with someone who was almost a complete stranger. "Was there anything else you wanted?"  
Carter's smile grew a bit, making his eyes brighter. "I wanted to know where your last knife was, but I think I finally figured it out."  
I gave a laugh. "Really? Where then?"  
"Bodice knife." He gave a nod at the look of shock on my face. "You have hidden it very well, but when you went to lean against the doorframe you ended up leaning a bit too far back. There is a slight difference between the pattern around your top and the hilt of your knife. You should be congratulated. You will fool anyone else you come up against. I only figured out where it was because I knew what I was looking for."  
I gave a slight shake of my head with a smile. "I think you are the first man I have met who was more interested in my weapons than my body."  
"That statement is a bit off. A woman's weapons are simply an extension of her body." Carter leaned forward giving me a soft kiss. It was brief, but oddly lingering. "A beautiful, dangerous extension to an already beautiful, dangerous individual. Good luck Siobhan, perhaps we will meet again."  
"Perhaps. Good luck Carter." _Goddess, I thank you for giving me my voice and not letting my knees start shaking._  
I watched him ride off and realized I was grinning. I knocked my head against the doorframe. "I need a real vacation. You know the whole convent lie might not be such a bad idea."

* * *

**A/N:  
So I just watched History Boys...good movie. Of course it then sends me off into the whole "Oh I want a boy so badly it hurts' spin. This is my sad little life.  
And was with family all weekend for a wedding. Highly interesting time. I think it was mainly because we're not even actually related (godmother's family). Good times were had.  
So, look! Really fast update...short chapter, but yay, right?  
By the by, I think there should be more reviews judging by the hits...hmmmm**

**theinstantstar15: I love my reviews. Trust me, I was glad to finally get a chance to update. Even more excited to see the first hit also came with a first review. Anyway, to be honest that wasn't how I planned to end Tobias either. I was considering a few different ways, mainly a long going war with Allan, like the one that was already starting. But after some thought and new ideas of direction I came up with this. Not too bad for a rushed idea I think. We'll have to see about Allan and Siobhan, see if he's going to screw up again and how she's going to react to his place in the castle. Always thanks.**

**Cowgirl: haha I was happy to have a long chapter. The end of that was what I planned for the beginning of this, but I figured more time had gone by between Marian's leaving and 'Get Carter' so there you go. Extra 2000+ words to make it a nice long chapter. I can promise 9 will be long as well, since this was a bit short. I think my dream means I need some normal relationships and I've been thinking about my cousin's wedding too late at night. My friend isn't so much as bad as Will, rather just annoying. And occasionally sends mixed signals. And seems to get really into my friends. He's like that annoying brother I never wanted. Thus, Will.**

**QuietOne364: Thanks as always.**

**X-uRbAn PiXiE-X: Thanks, nice to hear from another reviewer! Carter had a little intro. I mainly stick with how the episode went so generally if someoen shows up, you'll see them.**


	9. A Reuinion and Fresh Start

**Disclaimer: I do not own Robin Hood. I am not affiliated with BBC in any way shape or form. I own only my own characters. That's it.  
That and I bought movies...and soundtracks. You cannot imagine how excited that made me. That and singing along to the soundtrack to Across the Universe with my friend at midnight last night made this week a bit better.  
**

* * *

I sat in the barn twisting the ring on my hand. Things were little by little getting slightly better.  
After the blow up with Robin, apparently Djaq and Marian had gotten him to calm enough to start speaking to me again. He asked me to explain with detail what happened when Tobias had come. I told him everything, minus a few parts about Allan's words to me after. Robin was in a bit of a mood after out talk. He was glad I was fine, and felt better knowing Tobias was dead. I think he just had a bit of an issue that Gisborne, a bad guy, had killed Tobias, the other bad guy. It was a bit of a blow to Robin's ego being the good guy, but letting the bad ones do his job. It was only because he was talking to me again I didn't point this out.  
Of course, I managed not to get the full blunt of his anger. Reason one, because Marian and Djaq had apparently threatened to hurt him if he made me cry. That wouldn't have happened, but apparently Djaq and Marian had been worried about my emotional state lately. Reason number two was because Robin was still mildly disgusted that Marian had kissed Gisborne as a distraction. I was too, but I wasn't going to say it.  
Robin still wouldn't talk about Allan. That was a battle for another day. Which was fine. Plus, he really didn't need to know about the alliance Marian and I had with Allan. He also didn't need to know that Allan wasn't just helping me to redeem himself. He didn't know Allan and I were friends at all. He still believed we weren't talking. Better if we kept it that way for a little bit.  
Also, Robin had not commented about the Tobias situation, he had just wanted to hear the whole story. The thing he did comment about was my apparent feeling of uselessness. Robin had made it clear I wasn't going anywhere. I was still needed, and cared about. The conversation was getting a bit strained for both of us, so it didn't last long.  
It was something though.  
Now I'd been told to come to Gisborne's birthday party. Those who lived within Locksley had been invited to help celebrate the birthday of the 'Lord of the Manor'. I had come more because Allan had given me sad eyes, and I had to deliver cloths to the manor anyway. Plus Thornton had dropped a hint I might see an old friend there. Not sure who he meant, but Thornton had given me a smile so I believed it was a good surprise.  
"You know, you used to be smarter than you were pretty. So I suppose you sacrificed that fine brain of yours for looks. Because honestly, I cannot imagine why else you would be here."  
I looked up seeing the Fool that had been hired for Gisborne's party. "Who do you..." I stopped looking closer at him. "Francis?"  
He put his hands on his hips tilting his head. "So there is a brain hidden beneath all that hair."  
I launched myself at him for a hug, causing him to grunt as he caught me. "Where the hell have you been? I haven't had word form you in nearly three years now you git." I jabbed him in the side with a smile. "Life hasn't been the same without you."  
Francis grinned down at me, glitter and paint lining his face. "Well how long has it been since I left your pretty little face behind?"  
"You left year after Robin did, so five years now."  
"Ah yes." He hoisted me into the window to serve as his audience, even years ago he always needed an audience. Tapping a finger dramatically on his chin, he paced a bit. "Well I went off to London to study and have been working around there for a while. But you know all that. I had just begun to work larger venues when I stopped writing. Sorry for that my little duckling, but you know how exhausting work is. Of course I was also traveling so much I would never have a return address for you. Working in Prince John's court last year, I grew so weary of politics and how bloody _boring_ he is, I decided to come around and seek a smaller venue for work. I've been making rounds to the different villages and just came across Nottingham. I heard you still held position of High Seamstress and I've been meaning to find you."  
"Meaning to find me? How long have you been here for?"  
Francis grinned and pinched my nose. "No need to fret little one. I've only been here for about three days. So do tell me what else has-Hello, Hello, what's this I see?"  
I turned following his eyes, catching sight of a messenger with a wooden leg. There was something you didn't see everything. Add to that the box he was carrying held a pigeon inside.  
He tipped his head toward me. "Hello miss. Fine day isn't it?"  
"It is rather nice. Going to be a hot one though, judging by the skies."  
He gave a brief smile. "I've come from the Holy Lands, so a little bit of English heat is rather welcome. Begging pardon for a moment, but I must speak to the Lord of the Manor immediately, I have word from the King for him."  
Before Francis or I could stop him, he spoke to a guard who nodded and went inside, thankfully at a slow pace. Everyone was in celebration mode, and even the guards wouldn't give up the chance to drink some ale before delivering a message to Gisborne. Of course lately all messages went through Allan first so, we had some time.  
Francis leaned out the window, motioning the man back over. "Not to be a spoil sport mate, but you might want to hightail it out of here."  
"Why? Robin and I fought together in the Holy Land, I'm not scared of him. He might smack me in the head for getting my leg lopped off, but that's just Robin's way."  
"Yeah, well if he were still Lord of the Manor I'd say the same."  
The messenger's face fell. "Oh hell."  
I held up a hand before he could continue along the course of destruction. "Listen, head toward North Road, but stay off the path. Robin's been living in the forest. With any luck he'll find you first. What did the King need to tell Robin about that's so urgent?"  
The messenger looked me over. "I'm not supposed to say anything."  
"Listen, I'm a friend of Robin's. I'm just here keeping an ear to the ground. Just give me a word in case I find him first."  
"All I really know is that it has to do with Lardner's Ring. Thank you, both of you. North Road, off the path it is." He gave a nod before hurrying along as fast as he could.  
Francis looked at me. "An ear to the ground? My, my, what an interesting life you lead now."  
"I'm not the one dressing up in sparkles."  
"That was a horrible try at insulting me love. I thought you were suppose to grow wiser with age." He cocked his head and twisted his fingers behind my ear coming up with a small wren. "I see now, your mind has gone to the birds."  
I starting laughing and watched as he released the bird into the air. "Some times I wish you had stayed to keep me company." I straightened up on the sill looking out to the trees. "But I'm glad you did well for yourself. Better to get the hell out of here if you ask me."  
"Do tell me my little duckling, is what you said true? Have you been saving England with Robin Hood while I've been gone? I'm surprised Will would let you do something that dangerous."  
I forced a smile, biting my thumb. "Funny you say that because-"  
I was interrupted by the sight of Allan and Gisborne running out the front door.  
Gisborne looked around wildly. "Where is he?"  
A guard appeared next to him looking around. "I don't know sir. Perhaps he heard Robin was no longer Lord of Locksley."  
"And what Fool told him that?"  
Francis leaned out of the window to my right. "It's not a secret is it?"  
"Fool." He turned to Allan. "Get after him. I want that letter."  
Francis gave me a wink. "He won't get far. He's only on foot. Ha."  
I rolled my eyes as Allan gathered the guards to go. "Uh oh."  
Allan walked over to us, resting his palms on either side on me on the sill. "Siobhan, I don't suppose you had anything to do with the messenger leaving, did you?"  
I gave him an endearing smile. "Whatever could you be talking about Allan?"  
He sighed, shaking his head. "You drive me insane. Simply insane."  
"Of course I do. That's why you..." I caught myself and winced. "You should probably go before you get in trouble."  
Allan rose an eyebrow and tried to hold back a smile. "Before _I_ get in trouble or _you_ continue to say things before thinking them through?"  
I narrowed my eyes. "Allan, are we really going to test my patience this early in the day?"  
His lips twitched, but he ran off with the others toward the forest. Smart man.  
Francis propped his elbows on the sill looking up at me. "Ah. I see there's a few things I need to be updated on."  
"You have no idea."

* * *

I leaned against one of the pillars watching Francis' act. He was quite good. Of course he always had been. I'd learned from my mother the art of a sharp tongue and thinking quickly on my feet. Francis was my sparring partner on the quit wit aspect. Mainly because he was the only one who could keep up with me.  
Francis had been my father's godson who lived in the next province. During the summer he would come stay with us while his father traveled to London for work. It was helpful for Francis to learn from my father because many of his early illusions were aided by chemicals. Of course, we had been banned a few times after we set fire to the kitchen table...while we were sitting on it. It wasn't any wonder we were friends.  
The others liked him as well, but while Robin, Much, and Will might pick on me, Francis would always be on my side. Mind you we bickered, but it was always against each other, not in a group. It evened out the odds quite nicely as well. The three hard headed, rough and touch boys again the three people, Marian included of course, who could always outsmart them.  
"Richard the Lionheart they call him. Now going into battle in a foreign land, it's not the heart of a lion you want is it? Huh? Since when did a heart hurt anybody? 'Come on, I've got the heart of a lion.' You can imagine the Saracens translating that, can't you. 'He's got the what of a lion?' The teeth? The jaws? The claws?" He took a swipe at my face, then draped his arm across my shoulders. "Noooo. The heart."  
He proceeded to walk on, laugher following close behind. "Richard the Lion Claws, Jerusalem's yours. Come in, sit down, help yourself." He draped an arm around one of this other audience members. "Lionheart?" He made a noise and sliced a finger across the man's neck.  
There was appreciative laughter and he moved back around giving me a wink. Oh damn. I knew that look. He was about to do something extraordinarily stupid. I was betting he was going to go down the road of saying things he shouldn't say in front of the present company.  
"No wonder it's taking him so long over there. Mind you it's better than his brother isn't it?" He leaned on the head table and coked his head at the Sheriff. "Prince John, what's he doing? Sitting at home, heart of a door mouse."  
And there it was. The stupid statement and the look of anger on the Sheriff's face.  
The Sheriff motioned a guard over who began taking Francis away. "Prince John happens to be a very good friend of mine."  
"It's a joke. It's what I do. Let's try a little soothsaying, shall we?" He looped out of the guard's hold and sat him down. To continue his act he moved behind me, whispering low in his voice. "I have a feeling I'm going to get locked up and need a place to escape to. I don't suppose you are still living in the same cottage?"  
I moved my hand past my mouth pretending to cover a yawn. "Yes. I can't believe after all these years you still manage to get locked up every time."  
Francis gave me a small wink twisting about. "I'll make some predictions that will come true. Someone in this room with bare their buttocks to the Sheriff tonight."  
The Sheriff's eyes grew wider as he motioned to his guards. "Take that man to the dungeons now!"  
"Oh, hang on, prediction two." Even as he continued talking two guards had begun to drag him away. "Sir Guy's enjoyment will rise from the dead."  
Gisborne looked up with a brow raised. "What's that suppose to mean?"  
"Your woodcock, Sir Guy. I can bring it back to life."  
"Get rid of him."  
"Wait, you'll want to hear my third prediction. It's about Prince John. One day Prince John will be King of England."  
The Sheriff rolled his eyes. "I know that already."  
"But did you know, that there is something in Nottingham that cam stop him?"  
"Like what?"  
Francis managed to wrap his legs around one of the wooden beam, to keep the guards from dragging him off. "Lardner's Ring."  
I felt my eyes widen, so thankfully I was facing Francis. Apparently he knew what Lardner's Ring meant, though I didn't have a clue. That or he was pulling this out of his arse. Though I had a strange feeling he knew what it was about. Francis didn't gamble with his life unless he was positive of whatever he was speaking about.  
"What is Lardner's Ring?"  
"Well let me go and I'll tell you."  
By this point Francis was a perfect line, with the guards trying o pull him off the beam. He was a lot stronger than he looked apparently.  
The Sheriff gave a tsk. "Lock him in the dungeons, flog him in the morning and then he'll tell us. Now that really is funny."  
People gave nervous, forced laughs around me. No one really wanted to fall victim to one of the Sheriff's temper tantrums. If it meant playing along so be it.  
"You should listen to me. I know what I'm talking about." Francis looked down as one of the guard's pants fell down. "Ah, the first prediction. I told you. And the others will follow. Beware the power of Lardner's Ring." The guards finally tugged him off the beam and Francis shot me a wink, before being carried out.  
Times change, but for the most part people didn't. Not in the stupid things they did anyway.

* * *

I watched as Allan and a guard carried another in between them, and arrow through his chest. I quickly brought a pitcher around to the head table to heard what had happened while pouring drinks for the Sheriff and Gisborne. Things had been too quiet since Francis had been carried off, though I admit this wasn't the change of pace I had been hoping for.  
In a fit of anger the Sheriff jumped up and grabbed the arrow in the dead man's chest.  
Allan looked between them. "All we heard him say was Lardner. That was it."  
The Sheriff froze. When he came back to life he was slowly pulling the arrow out of the dead man's chest thinking aloud, though all our eyes were on the arrow.  
"Lardner..." He grabbed his plate throwing it at Gisborne who went to stand next to Allan, both trying to deflect the items the Sheriff was throwing.  
I calmly handed him the pitcher when he had run out of items.  
He took it, giving me a small smile before launching it at the men again. "Six legs against one! And the one got away!" He grabbed the top covering Gisborne's plate, revealing a cooing bird inside who immediately took flight.  
Everyone gave gasps of surprise, eyes following the bird as it went out the window.  
The Sheriff slammed the cover back on the plate eyes rolling wildly around. "There is an explanation. There is always a rational explanation."  
I moved carefully around the table to stand next to Allan. I gave him a grin when he finally looked at me, still in shock. "You really know how to show a girl a good time don't you?"

* * *

I had been excused from the search of the village for Lardner's Ring, but was told I had to go to the castle. On one hand I was angry I was being shooed off, but on the other hand I was highly amused watching the Sheriff attempted to figure out how Francis had made all the predictions and so far two of them come true. The third seemed like it would also come true if Gisborne and Allan could figure out where and what Lardner's Ring was.  
I was a bit worried about Francis. I had persuaded Allan, to let me grab some embroidery from my cottage before he shucked me off to the castle. He gave a little noise as I left a note on my table, telling Francis if he did make it back, that he might want to hide out along North Road until I could get back. I was impressed enough he had escaped from the dungeons, I just wanted to give him a sporting chance.  
Allan didn't say anything, just helped me on Fabian and told me to stay in the castle.  
Stay in the castle. There was an order I was still iffy about following.  
It was then that it hit me. I was turning into Marian. Thankfully not living in the castle, but spending free time there and pretending to be a good girl. I wonder if anyone else had noticed I'd taken her job. I wasn't as good since Gisborne wasn't head over hells in love with me, but I had Allan, and to be fair that was more than enough. Allan let me get away with anything I wanted because he was trying to completely fix ties between us, and because he wanted to help the others in anyway he could. Such as turning a blind eye toward my warning the messenger and leaving a note for Francis.  
I was jarred from my pondering by a shout from the Sheriff. "Sir?"  
He pumped a fist in the air, motioning me over. "I've figured it out!"  
"Found the button for the claw, Sir?"  
The Sheriff's smile faded as he pointed to the knob. "How did you know?"  
I gave a little shrug. "I used to sing at a few parties, made friends with a handful of illusionists and jesters. I ended up watching a few practice, so I picked up a few things."  
He let out a little sigh, but perked up seeing Gisborne enter. "Ah, Gisborne the Gullible. I have something to show you." He pointed to the platter with the apple on it, covering and uncovering the platter with the cover. "First you see it, then you don't. There it is, there is isn't."  
"Yes, what's your point?"  
The Sheriff leaned forward and uncovered the plate now minus the apple.  
Gisborne's eyes widened. "How did you do that?"  
The Sheriff gave me a smirk. "Glad to see someone is actually interested. Apparently I have underestimated your intellect."  
He turned back to Gisborne explaining about the handle of the lid, while I lifted myself into one of the open windows. I let one of my legs swing along side the wall looking out the window.  
"Bring them in."  
I brought my attention back to the men watching as Allan led in two guards carrying Francis and Will. Oh this day was just getting better and better.  
Sliding from the window, I shot Allan a look, motioning my eyes toward Will.  
He lifted the hands at his sides up, shooting me a look that said he had nothing to do with it.  
I gave a strangled noise in the back of my throat, leaning against the edge of the table.  
Thankfully the Sheriff started talking so no one noticed. "Now. You may want to explain to us about Lardner's Ring or we can simply continue torturing you."  
Francis looked around. "Well since there's an audience I suppose I could. Oh, and a lovely girl too. I suppose I can tell my tale." He wiggled his fingers around talking animatedly. "Over in your precious Holy Land the Saracens use pigeons to carry their messages. The smallest, fastest bird belongs to the sultan. The bird's name? La Denah."  
Gisborne and the Sheriff shared a look. "What about his ring?"  
"They put the message on a tiny ring tied to the bird's foot and they let it fly off. It doesn't matter how far away the bird is because it will always find it's way home, carrying the message with it." He held up a finger and gave his attention to me. "But for you romantics out there, I must tell the truth. It is not really its hoe the bird is searching for, but its mate. All you have to do is split the two of them up and a pigeon will carry a message to the ends of the earth, just to be with the one they love."  
"That's so beautiful."  
Everyone in the room turned to me, with looks mainly conveying I was being girlish and interrupting. Though Will just looked disgruntled and seemed to find it odd I was here. Not that I owed him any kind of explanation.  
I crossed my arms. "Well it is. Not my fault I'm the only one that has a heart in this room." I managed to get a wince from Gisborne, Will, and Allan with that one. Even for me that was pretty good. Francis just gave a little shake of his head smiling. Apparently he thought I hadn't changed much either.  
The Sheriff leaned forward. "So if a message was sent by the bird, back to say the Holy Lands, how long would it take to get there?"  
Francis seemed to debate the question. "A few days, much faster than if you were to send a message by ship."  
Allan looked up. "So that's what he must have had in his box. It should still be up the tree."  
Will's eyes were straight ahead, but his face was contorted. "You make me sick, you know that? Betraying your own friends. Lying to someone you claimed to love." His eyes briefly flicked to me, and it was pure self control that kept me from launching myself from the window to smack him. "I hope you're happy Allan. I couldn't live with myself."  
The Sheriff looked him over. "Well you won't have to worry about that for long. The penalty for being in Robin Hood's gang is death."  
I went to move, but caught the looks Allan, Will, and Francis shot me. I used to think Robin's look was bad, but the power of the looks from these three kept me frozen and mute. Amazing how three people from different sides of the situation all managed to have the same opinion about my involvement.  
Francis looked down where the Sheriff had kicked Will. "Right, well I think my work here is done. Can I go now?"  
"You can go, of course. With him. To the gallows. Hang them both. And feed their carcasses to the birds. Come along Gisborne, no time to lose."  
My eyes widened and I shot a pleading look to Allan, but hid it as the others turned around.  
The Sheriff gave me a little bow. "Every hanging needs an audience, perhaps you can stay behind." With that he turned and walked out the door, Gisborne close behind.  
Francis turned on his knees, throwing himself at Allan's legs. I noticed he snapped the key for the cuffs off Allan's belt. "No! Please have mercy, don't let him do this to me."  
Allan pushed him back, eyes looking down seeing the key was gone.  
"I do comedy, I don't do tragedy. Please?"  
"Well, seeing you swing will be a comedy won't it." He gave Francis a smack and stepped back meeting my eyes.  
I gave him a little smile, mouthing _Thank you._  
His lips turned up a bit, and mouthed back _Friends_. I knew what he meant. It was what friends did. What he would still do for the gang.  
Francis gave Will a glimpse of the key in his hand. Will's head snapped up watching Allan walk away. Allan gave him a slight nod before disappearing down the hallway.

I leaned my elbows on the steps watching as Will and Francis approached me wearing the clothes on the men they had just killed. Bit of poetic justice to hand the men who had been paid to hang them. Once both were coming toward me I smiled getting up.  
Walking a few steps forward I punched Will in the stomach watching him double over. "Do you always have to be such a complete rat? 'Lying to someone you claimed to love?' Will, can you pull your head out of your arse for just a few minutes to think that wasn't something appropriate to say?"  
He wheezed glaring at me. "I was only telling the truth."  
Francis grabbed me from behind lifting me in the air as I continued to try and kick at Will. "He wasn't bloody lying."  
"Leaving out the fact he was betraying us was just as bad as lying about it."  
"At least he wasn't lying about his feelings for me!"  
Francis swung me around, dropping me and forced himself between the two of us as Will reached out to grab me. "You know, I suddenly remember why I thought my godfather was crazy for trying to pair the two of you up." He looked down at me. "I suppose this is what you meant when you started to say I needed to be updated on a few things?"  
I gave a sheepish smile and nod, relaxing under his gaze.  
Francis sighed looking between us. "Look, we have a job to do. If you children would be so kind to shake on a truce until this is all over, I promise I'll let you tear each other apart."  
I gave him a sigh and shook Will's hand. "Fine, but this isn't over."  
"Never is with you."  
I narrowed my eyes at him, but allowed Francis to pull me up on behind him on the horse. As we road away I rested my chin on Francis's shoulder. "I apologize for that, but we have, uh, been having a few problems as of late."  
"Hadn't noticed."  
"I left him."  
"Now that information would have been useful. What could he have possibly done? I know you're both think headed, but-"  
"He knocked me unconscious and left me on the rooftop of the castle."  
Francis turned his head to look at me. "Well then. We're on a ride. You're a storyteller with a new story. Please, do go on."

* * *

I rolled my eyes appearing behind Francis with Will. "He's with us."  
Francis continued his comments about the note the others were writing. "Alliteration makes it much more memorable. Madam, manacles mere mystify myself and my...mates."  
Will rose an eyebrow but let it go turning back to the others. "You know about the pigeon."  
Much nodded. "Yes, Robin and Marian have gone to get it."  
"Yeah, well so have the Sheriff and Gisborne. They've got them trapped up a tree."  
I nodded. "They're surrounded. I know Robin is skilled, but even he cannot hold them off with the amount of arrows he carries."  
As the others grabbed their weapons, Francis looked me over. "Do you usually run through the woods in long skirts?"  
I rolled my eyes sliding out of the skirt, revealing the pants I wore underneath. "Come now, you of all people should know I'm always prepared."  
He stared at me open mouthed. Now that was new. "Honestly, who does that?"  
Will rolled her eyes. "She does."  
I glared as he walked off to grab his own weapons.  
Djaq rose a brow catching my look. "Did something happen?"  
Francis held up his hands. "Please, lovely lady. Do not make me go through that fight again."  
Djaq turned to me. "If you can explain in one sentence I'll ask no questions."  
"Allan saved Francis and Will's lives."  
Will went to open his mouth, but Djaq cut him off. "No, be quiet. We need to go help Robin and Marian first. Besides, you always exaggerate Will Scarlet. Siobhan gets to the point."  
I gave her my best smile as we ran out of the woods.  
Francis gave me a look, running at my side. "Still need to win every argument?"  
"It's the only pleasure anyone lets me have anymore."

* * *

Djaq and I crouched together behind a tree. "What was this fight about?"  
I rolled my eyes. "About Allan. The whole 'Allan betrayed us' blah blah blah fight. Which led into the semantics about what a lie was."  
"And you said something you should not have, I'm guessing."  
"I suppose 'At least he wasn't lying about his feelings for me' was a bit much."  
Djaq gave me a look. "Siobhan..."  
"Well, in my defense it was true." I sighed looking up at the tree where Robin and Marian were trapped. "I want to just get everything out in the open. I want to finally have a conversation about it all. Allan is welcome at my house, has been since the Tobias incident. I know Robin won't be happy, but I want to be able to explain without having another blowout. I do hate fighting with him. It's one thing to have an argument where we're both fine to discuss it again. It's another thing when one of us walks off like I did last time. Robin's the closest thing I have to family. He has always taken care of me and for the most part I do listen to what he has to say. I dislike not talking to him. I dislike him not treating me like a grown individual. Fine, I admit I'm the youngest one of us, but that does not make me a child. I never..." I shook my head. "I never wanted what I was given, but I never complained. I don't want to complain, but Robin is making it a bit difficult to just sit back and remain silent."  
Francis appeared behind me before Djaq could speak. "Duckling, I wouldn't suppose you still carry your magic bag with you."  
"What for?"  
"We need to make Robin and Marian disappear. We need a puff of smoke."  
I laughed reaching into my bag. "Would you prefer scented or unscented smoke?"  
Djaq grinned, reaching into my bag as well and running off with Will. I gave Much and John their own smudging sticks and flints.  
I looked Francis over. "Why do you carry flints in your pockets?"  
"Why did you upgrade to eight knives from six?"  
"All right. No more questions."  
He gave my nose a quick pinch, going back to trying to set fire to the smudge stick. "A good magician, my little duckling, never reveals his secrets."

* * *

"Robin. Always a pleasure." I looked over his shoulder. "You know, on another day when there's nothing to do, I'd like to try that. It looks like loads of fun."  
"On the horse Siobhan." He gave me a hand up sitting me behind Francis, giving the bird cage to Will. "Listen, ride as fast as you can, and get the bird out of here."  
"Where's Marian?"  
Robin gave me a look. "We will talk, just go."  
I nodded and wrapped my arms around Francis, eyes on the cage on Will's lap. "One little change to Robin's plan. Will, hear me out. I can promise you'll like this one."

* * *

Robin walked back into camp frowning.  
Much gave him an encouraging pat on the shoulder. "Cheer up."  
"What do I have to be cheerful about?"  
I grinned looking at Will. "So who gets to tell him?"  
Robin looked between us suspiciously. "What?"  
I stepped aside motioning to Will. "We have a special visitor."  
He gave me an odd look. "Who him?"  
Will scrunched up his nose. "Not me. Him." He put a hand underneath his cloak holding out the pigeon. "It's Lardner."  
Robin looked at us in shock.  
I laughed. "Cheering up?"  
"You're joking!"  
Francis clapped his hands on my shoulders. "When you want something to disappear the trick is to divert attention."  
Will nodded handing Lardner to Djaq. "We switched the birds."  
"I just happened to have a spare up my sleeve."  
Robin watched as Djaq attached the message to Lardner, still shaking his head in shock. "Did you attach a message to the decoy bird?"  
Much shook his head. "No it would have just weighed him down."  
Will turned back around. "Speaking of decoy birds...is Marian all right with Gisborne?"  
Robin gave a slight nod, seeming to pop his jaw, mind obviously elsewhere. "Yeah. She'll be all right. She can look after herself." He looked over to me. "Our girls know how to make their own decisions. They can take care of themselves."  
It wasn't an apology, but it was an acknowledgment that this was my life I was living. That was more than good enough for me.  
Will didn't touch the subject, in honesty he couldn't. He cleared his throat holding Lardner out to Robin. "Would you like to do the honors?"  
Robin gave the bird a kiss on his head. "Good luck my friend. Safe journey."  
We all watched as the bird flapped off into the sky. Hopefully Lardner would get to King Richard before we ran into trouble too big for even our group to handle.  
Francis gave my shoulders a squeeze. "I hate to ruin such a touching goodbye, but I sadly must be on my way as well. I applaud you on living in the forest, but I am a social creature. I need an audience. Also, don't believe I'll be needed in Nottingham anymore, so I should be on my way as quickly as is possible."  
I turned giving him a tight hug. "Where will you go off to now?"  
He gave a slight shrug. "Here and there I suppose. There's always work for me. Worst case I simply return to Prince John's court. I may even be able to be your highest ranking spy. I was only on leave to keep spirits high among the Prince's, uh, loyal subjects."  
"I'm going to miss you."  
Francis knew how hard it was for me to admit something like that. I liked being alone, but to miss someone meant I was getting very lonely. I missed family. Francis wasn't blood related, but he was what I had left. My parents were gone, I had no cousins to speak of. No blood relation, or relation by marriage left. I was an orphan in the easiest sense.  
Matilda was close like family, but even she was in hiding. Marian might have been like a sister, but I was raised to be more of a servant for her. Robin a similar sense, though neither treated me as a lower class. Everyone I cared about was in hiding. As free as I was, in actuality I was trapped more than the others could imagine.  
Francis gave me a kiss on each cheek. "No frowns, no tears. I promise to write, maybe even come visit you again when this whole mess is over."  
"Is there anything you need?"  
"A horse might be nice."  
Will nodded. "We can nick you one in town."  
I shook my head. "No, he's taking Fabian."  
Everyone fell silent. Giving up a horse was a very big step. This was grounding me.  
I gave them all a small frown. "He's my horse and this is my choice. Stop it with the theatrics. Besides, if anyone should take Fabian, it should be Francis. He should be with someone I trust to take care of him." I looked toward Robin specifically with a smile. "Besides. I'm not going anywhere."

* * *

Djaq came to sit beside me as I was lying on my back trying to fan myself. True to form it had gotten hotter as the day went on. It was a good thing we hadn't set real fires or else there would have been no Sherwood Forest left. I gave her a smile and continued to hum, closing my eyes hoping for a breeze.  
I kept my eyes closed, enjoying the fact the sun was slowly disappearing. The heat would let up, but the humid air would still remain. I was going to head out in a bit. The breeze by the water of my grotto would hopefully be nice enough to cool me down. That and I really needed to be alone and think a few things through.  
"Siobhan, can I ask you a question?"  
I answered slowly, decided I didn't want to see her face. I was a bit scared to let her ask a question, but it was only fair. She'd been helping me so the least I could do was hear her question out. "Of course."  
"You've been humming quite a bit lately."  
"Have I? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be annoying. I don't usually realize I'm doing it for the most part. Just let me know in the future and I will stop."  
"No, it's not that. I don't mind the humming, it breaks the silence nicely. It' just...have you realized you've been humming the same song? The lullaby you sang with Allan?"  
My eyes popped open. I racked my brain to think back and sure enough, I had been humming Hushabye Mountain. I groaned leaning forward. "How long?"  
Djaq looked at me unsure.  
"Djaq. Please, how long have I been doing this? Not necessarily the humming, just the song."  
"You started right after he left, humming the lullaby that is. I don't know if the others have really been paying attention to the song or not. Robin probably has, I don't think the others have though. You've always hummed when cooking or sewing, so there was no sudden change."  
"Wonderful." I sat up with a groan grabbing my basket. "Thanks for letting me know Djaq. Really, it's better I found out from you."  
"I didn't mean to upset you. Please don't go away angry."  
"I'm not angry." I shook my head with a smile. "You didn't upset me either. I was getting ready to leave anyway. Nice walk then back to the cottage. Maybe by tomorrow everyone will be in good humor still. For the first time in a while it was a day where I'm not leaving after fighting with anyone in camp."  
Robin appeared and took my arm. "I need a word."  
"Can it be quick? I really do want to get home."  
"Is there a reason you didn't want to tell me about this little alliance you and Marian have with Allan?"  
I adjusted my hands on the handles of my basket. So much for leaving without a fight. "I suppose because it didn't directly concern you. You said it yourself that we know how to take care of ourselves."  
"Not when it comes to Allan."  
"Robin, you're making him up to be some sort of evil genius. You know that's not true. I told you before. He saved me from Tobias. It doesn't change how you feel about him, but that doesn't mean I have to go about hating him."  
Djaq stood up. "She has a point Robin."  
Robin looked shocked. "Djaq?"  
"At least there is one other person in the castle that has Marian and Siobhan's best interests at heart. Someone besides Gisborne. Gisborne thinks he knows Marian, but he does not. Allan has a better chance of being able to keep her out of trouble than Gisborne."  
Robin turned around, noticing the others had begun listening in. "What is going on here? Will?"  
Will looked up, looking over my face and Djaq's. He let out a sigh shaking his head. "Robin, this one time I can't say anything."  
"Why?"  
I folded my arms. "Francis took the key for the shackles off Allan's belt. Allan noticed, but he let it go knowing they'd be able to escape. He saved Will's life. Even if Will hates Allan, he can't be apart of this particular argument."  
Robin looked me over carefully, though I noticed a muscle twitching in his jaw. "So, do explain what this now means."  
"My cottage is neutral territory. I want that to be understood. You of course are always welcome, but so is Allan. He's keeping me safe, and doing whatever he can to help Marian. I want this to be completely understood, that there will be no fighting in my cottage. Do what you want anywhere else, but everyone is welcome in my home without worries of bloodshed."  
With that I calmly turned around and walked away. Well, I hope it looked calm from behind. In reality my face was probably wearing a complete look of shock that I had said that and had the nerve to give the others my back.  
I couldn't imagine a more dramatic exit. Francis would have been proud.

* * *

I looked around me unable to hide the smile on my lips. Not that it mattered, the trees around my little grotto were deserted. Aside from that, it was already twilight and no one wandered the around the woods this late. Well no one wandered around here to begin with. I doubted anyone would start, especially in this heat. I placed my basket by the edge of the mini cliff next to the only boulder left on land. Pulling out the thong of leather I always carried with me, I tied my hair up before stripping my shoes off. I threw a last look over my shoulder before removing my bodice and sliding out of my skirt. I tugged my tunic down a bit further so it now fell just above my thighs. On second thought it was dark, and even the tunic was feeling too heavy for this weather. Tossing off the tunic I quickly dove into the water, breaking surface with a little shout about the shock of cold. Within another couple of moments I was comfortable and was swimming around lazily.  
I deserved this break. Tensions were growing a bit higher, especially when Robin found out about how deep the alliance was between Marian, Allan, and myself. Apparently he had mentioned something while they were up in the tree about how Allan was taking care of me. Unhappy didn't cover his feelings about the situation. It wasn't made any better about my attempts to defend Allan.  
At least Djaq was still on my side. She had made a few interjections that at least someone other than Gisborne was watching out for Marian and myself in the castle. Djaq had nodded at certain parts of my little speech and only some out when someone had been giving me a hard time and vicious looks. Strangely enough, even Will couldn't make too many comments. After all, Allan had saved Will's life. Oh the fun times to be had.  
So I had to put my foot down eventually. I had said it before to Allan, and I finally said it to the others. My cottage was neutral territory.  
"You know, a lovely lass like you should take a better look around before swimming around in the nude. Not that I'm complaining."  
I let out a yelp hiding behind one of the giant rocks in the water and took a peek around the smooth edge. Seeing who it was I let out a slew of curses. Moving carefully I rose just above the top of the rock, careful to keep only my neck and head showing. "Allan, what in the world are you doing here?"  
Allan scratched his chin, smiling at me from the bank. He was lying on his side, chest bare. His head rested on his folded shirt watching me with a lazy smile. "It was a beautiful day and the night is even nicer. I thought I'd come lay by the water to relax. Only place with a breeze around. Didn't realize how beautiful the view was on a nice night."  
I felt heart rush to my cheeks ad sunk back into the water. "Don't you have something better to do? Lackey duty?"  
He frowned, turning to lay fully on his back. "Siobhan please don't. If you would like me to leave just tell me."  
I bit my lip swimming closer to the ledge. It wasn't fair to say that, especially for all he had been doing. I just hated getting snuck up on. "I'm sorry."  
Allan tilted his head my way looking surprised. "What did you say?"  
I rolled my eyes. "Even I admit I can be too harsh sometimes."  
He propped himself up on his elbows giving me a full view of his chest. Unlike some of the others, Allan's muscles weren't exactly hidden, in fact he was well sculpted and firm to the eye. I would bet he was firm to the touch as well. _Bad Siobhan._  
Catching me staring he smiled. "Do you still want me to leave?"  
I met his eyes, today a deep, warm blue. "I never said I wanted you to leave now did I?"  
His smile grew, but remained mysterious. "Good I'd hate to leave you alone out here. Poor defenseless girl like yourself." He gave a small laugh, tossing his boots toward my basket before laying back down.  
"Defenseless?" I gave a mock sound of disgust.  
I smiled as Allan just closed his eyes, sweet smile on his lips. I swam a little faster, brining my arms forward quickly to send a full tower of water toward him. I sank further into the water laughing at the shouting from land.  
Allan sputtered from the ledge. Shaking his head, he dried his face on his shirt. "Siobhan, you should not have done that." He looked up at me, wicked grin on his face.  
I watched him and started to propel myself backward. "Allan..."  
He dove into the water and I could see his shadow moving closer to me.  
I hid to the side of a smaller rock, watching as he broke the surface. "Stop. Allan, this is a bit inappropriate."  
He swam closer holding the other side of the rock smiling at me. "What? I'm not being funny, but _I'm_ the one who is wearing clothes." He splashed me and grabbed my hand when I put it up to block the water. "The reason I came out here was to talk to you."  
I moved a bit closer to his side of the rock surprising both of us a bit. I made a quick look down giving an internal sigh of relief seeing that the water was too dark to see anything besides a shadow of my body.  
Allan looked at my hand securely in his own and met my eyes. "I'm sorry."  
"What?"  
"I broke your trust. For all of this, everything, I'm sorry. I know you're doing your best, and I want to thank you for that."  
I was still kicking to stay afloat, but Allan had gotten a better hold of the rock keeping still.  
His thumb brushed over the knuckles of the hand he still held. "Siobhan, I just want you to know I will do anything to gain back that trust."  
I hated to hear the hurt in his voice. That hurt me more than everything Robin and the others said about him. I leaned forward kissing his cheek. "You have my trust. You lost it, but I promise you have it back. You never put me in immediate danger and you never broke your promise to Marian. You never let me down when I needed you. Even when I don't know I need you, you are still there. You still take care of me."  
That's when I slowly came to my senses and reality. We were in the water together and a bit too close for me to handle. Add to that the fact I wasn't wearing any clothes and I felt the heat rise up my neck. Allan's eyes looking at me were perfectly clear turning that intense crystal blue they did whenever we seemed to be in a situation like this. When he first kissed me beneath the Willow and when we said goodbye before I took my vacation. The look that let me know not all of his intentions were exactly pure.  
My hand dropped from his as I wrapped my arms around my body feeling suddenly self conscious. I already knew the water was too dark to see, but his look...  
Allan watched me slightly confused, but he knew enough not to reach for me.  
To make matters worse I caught sight of Robin and Djaq coming into the cleaning. Naturally. All these years of waiting for someone to find me and suddenly they all do.  
Forgetting my embarrassment, I pinned Allan to the rock and clapped a hand over his mouth. My other hand clutched to the rock still trying to keep afloat, but only the tops of my shoulders above water.  
"Please Allan, don't say anything." I lowered my voice further, checking around the side of the rock to see what was happening on land. "Robin and Djaq are here. Just don't say anything."  
I turned back for confirmation and saw Allan staring at me intently. _Ye gods._  
He nodded slowly and snaked an arm around my waist. Turning his head to the side, he released his mouth from my hand to speak. "I will behave." He noticed my look as I stared pointedly at his arm. "I just don't want you to get exhausted from trying to shut me up."  
I nodded and put a hand on his shoulder, better balancing myself to look back at the shore.  
Allan made a little noise and I turned back to him quickly withdrawing my hand. Shaking his head he fixed the grip on both myself and the rock. "Your hand is fine. I was just thinking. Under different circumstances..." His eyes swept a line up from my neck to my eyes. He pressed me a bit closer and I realized I wasn't breathing.  
"Siobhan? Are you out here?"  
Allan brushed his lips across my forehead and loosened his grip on my waist, but kept me close.  
I let him continue holding me, wrapping my fingers around his wrist before moving into partial view. "Robin? What are you doing here?"  
Robin raised a brow in my direction smiling. "Djaq thought she saw you walk into the woods, I wanted to make sure everything was all right. Plus I wanted to talk to you. Before you begin yelling, I do realize you are not a little girl anymore. I respect that. I thought if you were up to it we could actually talk. Djaq offered to supervise. She also didn't trust me coming to find you by myself. So, come out of the water so we can talk."  
"Can it wait?" I gave him a smile, because giving a cheer of victory would have been rather childish. Finally he was willing to talk, not just lecture.  
Djaq looked at the clothes by my basket and started laughing, grabbing Robin's arm. "I don't think she can just hop out of the water Robin. Her, uh, clothing seems to be here."  
Robin covered his eyes with his hands giving a groan. "I didn't need to know that, thank you very much Djaq." Still coving his eyes he turned walking back into the woods. "Come to camp tomorrow we'll talk then. Get some sleep, or something."  
Djaq rolled her eyes and lifted my clothing from beside my basket laying it all out on a rock. My skirt seemed to have gotten a bit wet from when I splashed Allan. I saw her eyes fall on the boots Allan had left beside my basket and she gave me a look.  
I shook my head slightly, indicating I would explain later. Much later if I could help it.  
She looked a bit disappointment, but nodded in agreement before running after Robin. I knew for a fact she was not going to let this go.  
I sighed and passed a hand over my eyes. My grotto had been found out which meant my last relaxing place was no longer a secret.  
Allan pulled me back to him carefully. "You okay? If this is making you uncomfortable..."  
My lips twitched into a smile.  
He frowned. "I meant the whole situation."  
I sobered. "I just need..." I felt Allan's hand slid to my hip. The look on his face told me he was completely unaware of what he was doing. "I need to get clothes on."  
I felt my throat go tight as he imply nodded, letting me go. "I'll give you some time before I follow. I don't suppose-"  
"I have a pair of pants for you. No worries."  
I gave him a little smile and swam to shore. Climbing on the closest rock I threw myself to shore, simply wanted to get dressed quickly. I slid quickly into my skirt and gave a little groan seeing my tunic had gotten the most damage. Rather than rummage through my basket I shrugged into my bodice. It was too hot for the tunic anyway.  
The blood pounding in my ears must have been what kept me from hearing Allan get out of the water. It was his hand on my shoulder that alerted me to his presence and made me jump.  
I held my hands over the front of my bodice turning to him. Thankfully I had laced it almost all the way up, only missing the front two holes.  
Allan held his hands up in the air with a smirk on his face. His pants clung wetly to him and I turned quickly, bending over my basket. From within I took out a pair of dry pants and tossed them behind m, knowing he would catch them. I kept my head down and went to my knees. One hand was on the ground, the other was at my breast trying to slow my breathing.  
I felt Allan kneel beside me. "Are you all right? I swear I didn't mean to startle you."  
I turned my head to look at him. He had changed into the pants I had thrown him, but was still shirtless. His eyes were full of concern and it was apparent he was debating whether or not to reach out for me.  
I squeezed my eyes shut, curling my finger into my palm. "I'm fine."  
"Not being funny, but if that's what fine looks like, I'm scared to see you worried."  
I opened my eyes looking over at him again. At least he was joking again. Whenever he was serious, I seemed to collect butterflies in my stomach. I let out a long, slow breath, giving him a smile. "Better?"  
He reached out and touched my cheek. "Talk to me Siobhan."  
I curved my face into his hand without thinking. "You are making my life difficult."  
"What can I do to make it easier?"  
I thought about it and turned on my knees to properly face him. "Don't move."  
I leaned forward tracing my fingers across his forehead. I moved my fingers down his nose and across his cheeks. I brought both hands up tracing along his jawline, fingertips running through the short hairs of his beard. My eyes fell to his mouth, an index finger traced the curve under his lower lip right above his chin. Pulling back a bit, I let my hands drop to rest on his shoulders.  
Allan reached his hands out and cupped my elbows, bring my eyes up to meet his. "How does this make it easier?"  
I thought about what I was doing and stared at the emotions running through his eyes. Sorrow, need, longing, and a plea for hope. "You want forgiveness, you want me to fully trust you again. I need to feel sincerity." I let a hand drop from his shoulder and rest over his heart. "This makes it all easier."  
Allan rocked forward on his knees and pulled me in, capturing my mouth. His hands slid up the back of my arms and slowly moved up my neck.  
I gasped against his lips, but eagerly accepted him. My fingers curled into his shoulders and I pressed myself tighter against him.  
Allan's fingers slid through my wet hair, one hand at my back, the other cupping the back of my head to take the kiss deeper.  
This was our first kiss since the night under the Willow a year ago. The kiss was more wonderful than I remembered, and made better by the fact nothing was holding me back this time.  
Allan slowly broke the kiss, moving his lips up my cheek and past my temple before pressing a kiss into my hair. "Did you know that you taste like apples?" His voice was a bit husky, but held a little rumble like suppressed laughter.  
I felt a blush creep into my cheeks and tried to hide my face against his neck. "I did not."  
He ran his knuckles down my bare arms, and nudged me to look at him. "Then I suppose you also didn't know your eyes light up when you blush?"  
"Do you have any idea how difficult you are?"  
He grinned. "Some. Now tell me honestly, what else is wrong? Is there anything I can do? I want to help, I need to help."  
"First off, put on your shirt. Then come walk with me."  
Allan nodded and stood.  
I leaned back to balance on my elbows watching as he slid his shirt over his head and shrugged into his vest.  
He looked down at me, holding out his hands. "Come on, I was promised a walk, wonderful company, and a mildly worrisome conversation."  
I took his hands allowing myself to be pulled into his arms. "We don't need to have the conversation tonight."  
He rose an eyebrow. "You had something else in mind?"  
I rolled my eyes. "I was thinking you could walk me home so I can get some sleep."  
"Ah."  
"Allan. Be serious for a moment."  
"Well we're no longer simply 'friends' now are we?"  
"No."  
"What are we?"  
I bit my lip staring at him. "I'm not exactly sure."  
"Is there a we?"  
"Are you courting me?"  
Allan gave me the lightest of kisses, making me to lean into him trying to keep his lips against mine. "I like to think I never stopped."  
I slid my arms around his middle resting my cheek again his shoulder. "So you think this might send Robin off the deep end?"  
He gave a laugh putting his arms around me and swaying a bit. "I wouldn't start off the conversation with it. It's a plus he is even willing to talk about it. Why is that?"  
"Because I might have pointed out Will and Francis only escaped because of you. Djaq has been on my side pointing out all you've been doing for Marian, me, and everything you've been doing to still help the gang out."  
"I feel like there's something else you're leaving out."  
I adjusted my cheek on his shoulder. "He knows about what happened with Tobias."  
Allan was silent, but held me a bit tighter at my words. We stood like that for a few minutes just swaying in the small breeze that was just beginning.  
He finally gave a little sigh and kissed the top of my head. "Let's get you home."  
I nodded and went to grab my basket, but Allan took it from me, resting it on top of his shoulder and held out his hand to me. I slid my hand into his turning my palm so I could twine my fingers into his. We walked in silence back to the cabin. I didn't know what Allan was thinking, but as we said goodbye I was amazed to realize how well our hands fit together.

* * *

**  
A/N:  
Sooo yeah. I am an updating beast. Don't get too used to it haha  
I have almost caught up with how the second season is running in America. Holy shit, I didn't think I'd be able to do it.  
Just to let you all know, episode 10? Going to be fun.  
Oh and if I have any artists out there, can someone draw me a picture of the water scene? I'll figure out a way to reward you :)**

**On to my reviewers:  
Cowgirl: I like Cater and if Siobhan was an actual character on the show, I can honestly see the two of them getting along. Hope the chapter makes you happy, I know it made me smile. Yeah my friend is a pain in the ass, but it's all good. The mixed signal thing stopped a little while back, which is better off because we are much too alike and he refers to me as his sister.**

**theinstantstar15: I was planning on doing more interaction with Carter, but I wanted to make sure Siobhan was there for the Allan/Marian meeting. Things get more interesting...just like we see from this chapter. I'm hoping there was a fan girl squeal at the end of this haha**

**  
x-uRbAn PiXiE-X:haha Carter is pretty kick ass. Yeah, and writing about amazing men doesn't help. But I suppose that's what college is for. Which gives me about a month...**


	10. A Birthday Wish

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Nada.**

* * *

I opened the door meeting Marian's look of displeasure. "Is there a reason you locked me out of my own room?"  
I stepped outside with a twirl giving her a full view of my dress. "Because I couldn't well wear this walking into the castle. Too much dirt to get on it. Plus it would ruin the surprise."  
I had completed my birthday dress. As it was my birthday it was only right to wear it. The silk lining did wonders to make my skin feel smooth and cool in the dwindling summer heat. After a look in Marian's mirror I realize the blue of the dress really did make my eyes sparkle as Rafael had thought it would. I had washed my hair in the grotto before light and now let it fall in light waves down my back making my skin seem more warm than it's usual cool tone.  
I had incorporated a corset to the dress, something I didn't normally do, but it did complete the dress. Silver stitching swirled up the corset and lined the tops of my sleeves that left my shoulders bare. The sleeves widened into a slight bell toward the end, small silver stars at the edge. I loved the sleeves as they showed only the tips of my fingers giving it almost a magical look. That and the difference was less obvious when I pulled my hand into my sleeve to grab a weapon. A beautiful dress and even more lethal than usual. A win-win if I do say so myself.  
I bit my lip, hands around my waist, suddenly unsure. "I admit I did get a bit carried away."  
Marian shook her head giving me a hug. "You look absolutely lovely."  
I gave her a squeeze back. "I'm also in a wonderful mood. Marian, I feel so good I'm not wearing all my knives."  
"Not wearing, but carrying?"  
I gave a laugh. "Yes, well the dress is a cut a bit too low to hide a knife in the bodice, and I wanted to keep my hair down. If something happens I can just put them back on my legs, but I just feel so good today."  
"I'm sure that also has nothing to do with the fact you finally got your way with Robin."  
I gave her a grin. "Well it is nice to finally get my way. He's not thrilled with my choices, but he is now in full understanding and even he realizes it's best. Gisborne was less nasty toward me with Allan around, even when you weren't around. Plus, now I can spend more time with you."  
Marian narrowed her eyes. "Robin agreed to this because it lets you keep a closer eye on me, didn't he?"  
I scrunched up my nose. "It's not the only reason. Plus, Marian you did kiss Gisborne."  
"Don't you have someone else to annoy, birthday girl?" She gave me a slight smile. "I'm surprised I'm your first visit."  
I felt a small rush of heat in my neck. "Of course you were my first visit."  
She rolled her eyes heading into her room. "Go see him, just remember to be careful."  
I shook my head going down the staircase. "Whatever you say mother."  
Marian did have a point though. Allan and I had been spending more time together, since the night in the grotto. It made me feel better not to have to sneak around and lie about talking to him. I think Allan just liked the fact he could touch me again without fear of being slapped. Perhaps I was getting a bit too attached so soon after becoming friends again. Then again, perhaps I really did not care.  
At the bottom of the stairs I saw him stretching his arms, apparently too tired to be awake this early. I smiled to myself, pretending I didn't notice the sudden butterflies in my stomach. From behind I placed my hands over his eyes and giving his cheek a quick kiss.  
Taking my hands off his eyes he turned around with a smile. "Someone must be in a very good..." His voice fell away as he caught sight of me. The smile was replaced by a slightly open mouth, eyes a bit wide.  
I felt my hair and turned to look down at my dress. "Oh damn. Please don't tell me I already got something on the dress. Is it my hair? Did it frizz out already?"  
Allan took my hand, giving me a little spin around. "Sorry, I'm in a bit of shock. I knew you were making a dress for your birthday, but..." He grinned again as I turned to face him again. "I am beginning to wonder whose birthday it is."  
I rolled my eyes. "Flattery will get you no where with me Allan. You know that."  
He leaned against the wall holding both of my hands. "And when will you learn to take a compliment? I'm simply telling the truth."  
I rose a brow. "So I suppose you want a dress for your birthday?"  
His lips twitched into a smile. "Oh I'd be much happier with a simple nighttime swim."  
I felt myself blush, unable to help it. "Incorrigible, you are."  
He ran his fingers through my hair, smile growing. "What's this I see?" His hand reappeared holding a rose out to me. It was a deep red and devoid of thorns.  
I kissed the tip of his nose, taking the rose from him. "How did you do that?"  
Allan smiled pulling me forward slightly. "Sometimes I think you forget I am an expert thief. I have perfected the art of making things appear and disappear." He tilted my chin up, pressing a soft kiss against my lips. "Happy birthday Siobhan."  
"ALLAN! WHERE ARE YOU?"  
We both jumped. Didn't sound like Gisborne was in a good mood.  
Allan held up a finger going toward the front staircase to answer Gisborne. They spoke quickly and Allan came running down the stairs, calling the guards together for a search.  
He came grabbing my arm. "The Sheriff is missing."  
I shook my head. "You know Robin wouldn't do anything. Not since we found out what would happen if something happened to him."  
Allan gave me a look. "Someone came to check in on him today."  
My eyes widened as I realized what this meant. If the Sheriff wasn't found we were all dead. If there was one thing I was sure of, it was that it would not be a swift death. "What can I do?"  
"I'm sending the guards out to look. If you could give me a hand around here?"  
I nodded, pulling him toward the stables. "Of course. Stables first. I know one of the stable girls, Amanda. She gets up at first light to feed the horses. That would be my first place to look."

* * *

I came up behind Allan holding and put my hands on Amanda's shoulders. "Please Sir Guy, patience." I nodded to her, rubbing her arms. "Just tell him what you told Allan and me."  
She gave a nervous nod. "He said...open the gate."  
Gisborne's eyes widened. "And what did you do?"  
"I opened the gate. He was in his nightclothes sir. I thought it was something important."  
I gave her shoulders a squeeze. "You didn't do anything wrong Amanda. You did your job."  
She gave me a half smile and ran off, I imagined, back toward the stables.  
Gisborne came over looking more tired than I had ever seen him. "Siobhan, go with Allan. I would not ask, but even you know what is at stake if the Sheriff is not found."  
I didn't even have the heart to make a comment about the 'even I knew' comment. "I would be glad to help Sir Guy."  
Allan led me out, hand on the small of my back. "We're going to need to move fast. Would you prefer to split up?"  
I shook my head. "We'll get more done together. Believe it or not, I know the people to ask. When it comes to things like this no one will lie. Everyone is aware of what is at stake Allan."

* * *

"Alright. He's not been seen in Locksley, Nettlestone, or Clun."  
I followed Allan down the staircase. "Worse news. There's been reports of troop movement heading this way along the North Road."  
"No!" Gisborne slammed his hands on the table. "This is not HAPPENING."  
Marian came in from the side entrance. "Has there been any change?" She gave Allan and I a nod before following Gisborne, determined look on her face. I wasn't sure I liked that look.  
"No. If the Sheriff hadn't left on his own accord, I would believe this to be Hood's work."  
"No, no, no. Hood knows the arrangement between the Sheriff and Prince John. He wouldn't let Nottingham be destroyed." Marian paused coming around to Gisborne slowly. "On this occasion, I don't think Hood is the problem. But he might be the solution."  
I sidled beside Allan speaking to him in a low voice. "She has officially lost her mind. I agree with her, but Gisborne will never go along with it."  
"We do not deal with outlaws." Gisborne started walking away. Marian was making sense, but his pride was on the line.  
"This could be our only hope. If I could get a message to him. If I could bring him here to the castle." She must have seen me wince and realized her own words.  
"You?"  
I went to move forward, but Allan's hand shot out pulling me back. He spoke low, lips in my hair. "Don't. You know Marian, if anyone can get out of it she can. Besides, I don't think she's the one that's suppose to go off into the forest to give him word."  
I watched as Gisborne gave the tightest of nods and stormed out the door beside us.  
Marian nodded motioning us over. "Hurry. Allan take this, give it to Robin. He'll know I sent you." She pulled a chain up from where it was hidden down her top. Unclasping it she slid the ring off the chain placing it in Allan's open palm.  
My jaw dropped. "Marian is that..."  
She gave me a look. "This is not the time Siobhan."  
"How did no one tell me?"  
Allan rolled his eyes. "I think you hurt her ego Marian."  
I punched him in the arm. "Pardon me for wanting to know when my friends are engaged. Again." I scrunched my nose. "Is the term re-engaged?"  
Marian gave a sigh. "We weren't planning on telling anyone for a while. Not until the King came home. Do not complain so much Siobhan. Robin hasn't told anyone yet either."  
I gave her a hug stepping back. "Congratulations anyway." I turned to Allan. "Shall I come with you?"  
"I think I can handle delivering a message. Plus wouldn't want your dress to get dirty already."  
I crossed my arms. "I meant as backup just in case they decide to riddle you with arrows once you've delivered your message."  
Marian held up her hand before either of us could continue. "Children! Allan, hurry go now. Every minute we waste we come closer to dying. Siobhan, stay here with me. We need to get some planning done."  
I stuck my tongue out at Allan, regressing to a five year old.  
He smirked giving my cheek a kiss and whispering in my ear. "I would probably not do that. You give me ideas."  
Before I could retort he was gone and Marian was smiling at me. "You know, as much as I do tend to find him annoying, I enjoy the fact he shuts you up so easily."  
"Funny, I was about to say the same about how you are with Robin. Now I would like an explanation as to why you did not tell me you and Robin were engaged again. And do not give me any of that 'we were waiting for better times' line. I do not want to hear it. Think of it as a birthday present. Tell me everything."

* * *

I was standing in the hallway when Allan and Robin came in. "Robin, you and I need to have a talk later."  
Robin shook his head with a slight smile. "I wish Marian had sent you instead." He gave my forehead a kiss. "Happy birthday little one."  
I rolled my eyes. "Go talk to the man in charge. You can avoid this conversation for now, but not forever. No matter how short a time forever is."  
He nodded heading in with his usual overconfident swagger.  
I crossed my arms leaning against the wall looking Allan over. "Glad to see you are arrow free."  
"The ring was the only thing that saved me."  
I frowned. "This is turning out to be the worst birthday ever."  
Allan held out his arms. "What can I do?"  
I moved into his arms, letting myself be folded into their warmth. "Holding me would be a nice start." I adjusted my head on his shoulder giving a little sigh. "I've had a lot of bad birthday's so I can say this is the worst without any problem."  
"You've never had a birthday where the entire village was suppose to be burned to the ground? That's quite a shame." He noticed my glare and gave me a kiss. "Sorry. Just trying to lighten up the mood. Hard to lighten a mood of impending death."  
I grabbed his face. "Allan. For once, shut it."  
He smirked. "Make me."  
I shook my head. "Not rising to the bait."  
"Too bad, but you do need to have nineteen birthday kisses before the day is over."  
"I've never heard of that tradition be-" I was silenced as Allan pressed his lips against mine, still holding me tightly. Amazing, even with impending doom and death a few hours away I felt safe.  
"Listen, I know I said it was fine you two were talking again, but I draw the line at kissing."  
I jumped and saw Robin glaring at us. "I'm guessing you are off to find the Sheriff. Anything we can do to help?"  
"Allan can stay in the castle, double check to see if anyone might have overhead anything else he said. Siobhan, I need to borrow you for a moment."  
"Robin-"  
"I just need our help with something in the village. Allan's presence won't be much help."  
Before I could argue Allan nodded. "Whatever you say Robin." He turned to me with a small smile. "If you need anything, just come find me."  
I watched as he walked down the hall and followed Robin.  
At the gate Robin turned to me. "This we can argue about some other time. Right now I need you to help Will. I'll need to ask you both for a favor I truly do not want to ask."

* * *

I stood in front of the entryway to the town watching as the cloud of dust rose. "They're getting closer." Obvious to say, but saying it aloud make it real.  
Will looked over at me. "Is it terrible to say I don't want to die just yet? I am not a coward, not afraid of death, but I don't think it's my time yet."  
I gave a little lift to my shoulders. "I wake up every day thinking I might not make it home that night. Although I admit, this is not the way I would hope to go."  
Will stared at me before finding his voice. "What was it like when you..." He turned his hands so I would catch his drift.  
"When I tried to kill myself to force you to save Nottingham?"  
He winced at my words but nodded.  
I looked back out to the landscape watching the dust cloud rise further up. "It was relief. I wouldn't have to worry about being hurt, watching everyone I care about in pain, and just rest. It was death I controlled and would be quicker than torture of the Black Knights. Will, we may not share the same beliefs in Paradise, but I believe in one. My family is there. I was loosing my bit of happiness here. Before your ego grows, I am not only speaking of you. Yes, what you did to me hurt, both physically and mentally. I just refuse to dwell. Some people say you should forgive and forget. Well I forgive, but I do not forget."  
I shook my head. "I have said it before and I will say it again. I am only human. A girl can only be hurt so many times before she is beyond repair. My parents deaths, you, Allan, Robin, Marian, everyone. Everyone's lectures about how I should and should not live, the many losses I have had, it wears me down. I am not saying I am weak. You should know that is something I will never be or say.  
"It was a relief knowing I would be fine and everyone would still be okay without me."  
"We would not be 'okay' Siobhan. Do you really think that little of yourself to think no one would miss you?"  
"I never said no one would miss me. I said you would all be okay. I know people would miss me. I am not vain, but I do realize people care about me."  
"Allan's not the only person that cares about you Siobhan."  
I turned to face him with a sad smile. "But he understands."  
Allan walked over standing on the other side of Will. By the look on his face I could tell he had not heard what we were just discussing. He followed our sights to the rising dust cloud and gave a little shake of his head. "I don't think we're going to get out of this one."  
I was taken aback. This was not the positive Allan I knew.  
I watched as he turned to Will not meeting my eyes. "If we do make it out do you think...do you reckon I could come back to the lads?"  
Will gave a strangled laugh. "It's too late Allan. Miles too late."  
"Will, don't." I pushed myself between them realizing how bad of an idea this was.  
"Come on I've made a few mistakes-"  
"A few mistakes?" His voice turned angry as he rounded on Allan.  
Will's face contorted. "You deliberately betrayed us Allan."  
He pressed himself against me, trying to get at Allan. I wasn't hyperventilating, simply not breathing. I was stuck between my ex-lover and current...well I didn't know what to call Allan at this particular time. But I was stuck between two men who meant so much to me and yet stood on opposite sides. For example Will wanted to kill Allan. Well, kill was a bit of an over exaggeration. Though I had a feeling Robin revealing he had caught Allan and I kissing hadn't exactly made Will feel any better about Allan. Perhaps 'maim' would be the more appropriate term. Allan on the other hand wanted a fresh start, though from what I knew he still hadn't fully forgiven his old friend for knocking me out. I was stuck in the middle of a fight for dominance.  
Allan nodded. "All right, strictly speaking that's true. Yeah, but it's not that simple Will. I never told Gisborne where the camp is. I never betrayed Marian. I have been protecting Siobhan. I saved your life didn't I? Well? I know a lot about how this place works now. That's going to help, right? Come on, do you reckon we could all be back together again?"  
"You're with Gisborne now. There's no coming back from there." He turned walking away from both of us.  
"Allan..." I turned around touching his cheek, not sure of what else to say.  
He shook his head. "I need to go back into the castle."  
"Allan please-"  
"Siobhan, don't." He shook his head hurrying off.

* * *

I stood beside Marian as Sir Jasper took off to meet the army sent to kill us. "Wonderful. You know of all the ways I thought I would die, death by army was never one of them."  
Gisborne and Allan appeared behind us, wincing at what lay before us.  
Gisborne's face turned to a stone. "Allan, round up the guards. Tell them to get into position."  
"What guards? They're all out looking for the Sheriff."  
"Then get every able bodied man into the armory."  
"What? Trust this lot with weapons?"  
"Right now they're going to kill all of us. For today we're all a single force."  
"Are you-"  
"Do it!" He ran off into the crowd.  
Allan stared at me. "This should be interesting."  
I untied the leather thong from my wrist and started to tie up my hair. "I'll need a bow and arrows. My knives are my last resort. That's for up close. I'll like to get a few down before they reach the walls."  
"Siobhan-"  
I pointed out toward the horizon as we closed the front entrance. "Impending death Allan. No time to argue. We need to prepare. Now."

* * *

I handed off several swords to boys I'd taken care of just a few years ago. I don't know what bothered me more. The fact I had done so much to keep them alive or the fact that our lives depended on these boys who still had much growing up to do.  
"Allan, Siobhan, where's Marian?"  
Allan and I turned moving forward to meet Will.  
Allan handed him a sword. "You'll be needing this."  
Will stared down at the sword in his hand and back up at Allan. "Looks like we're brothers in arms again after all."  
Allan laughed. "Not exactly what I had in mind." He held out his hand to Will.  
Will looked at it for a moment, before grasping it giving it a tight shake.  
I threw my arms around both of their necks. "Thank the goddess."  
They both gave me identical looks of shock and alarm. Once again my sanity was in question.  
I gave a choked laugh. "This is the best birthday present anyone could have gotten me." I kissed Will on the cheek and grabbed Allan's face kissing him full on the lips. "If we all die today I am thankfully you two could get along for this short time."  
Allan brushed his lips across my forehead, not daring to meet Will's eyes. "Go with Will. I need to finish up here."  
I nodded and followed Will through the crowd toward Marian. "Thank you."  
He looked me over giving me a small, crooked smile. "I'm trying to make amends. I figure since things aren't looking so good I can do everything I can to make today a little better." He still managed a slight grimace. "Although I'd appreciate it if you tried not to kiss him in front of me."  
"I'll try to remember that." I smiled and gave his hand a squeeze. "As I said before, this is the best birthday present I could ever ask for. Seeing as this may be my last birthday I appreciate it even more."  
Marian turned looking at us. "Any word from Robin?"  
Will shook his head. "No, but I know he will die before he stops looking."  
"Today that is not good enough Will."  
"Marian the one person who can't die is you."  
"There's no way out."  
Will looked to me for help.  
I couldn't help but grimace as Marian looked between us. Her face held a mixture of shock and alarm. "We promised Robin you would be safe. If we can find a way out, you need to live." I took her ring out of my sleeve and placed it in her palm closing her fingers around it.  
Seeing the look on her face I realized this might be more than I could bare to see. Robin was saying in his own way that if her only way out was letting her go-brining her to Gisborne-than we had to help him do it. We had to help him let her go because he would not be able to live knowing he failed to keep her alive.  
It was a promise I did not want to make. I argued to point stating I was tired of pushing Marian to make decisions we had set out for her. She was a grown woman. What broke me was the look in Robin's eyes. The look that stated this was the very last thing he wanted to do. He didn't want to think about this opinion any more than we wanted to hear it, but it was plain on his face why he had asked us to do this. He would never forgive himself if anything happened to Marian. The pain in his eyes had frozen my heart. That pain was more intense than what I had felt, and I thought I was going to die from everything Will and Allan had put me through. How Robin could stand there in front of us was beyond me.  
For this reason I had promised him to keep Marian alive. Yet, for my own personal reasons I had to move on rather than see the look that was forming over my oldest friend's face.

* * *

Will turned on me, exasperated. "Aren't you going to help me?"  
I threw up my hands. "What do you want me to do Will? Drug her and make her go along with Gisborne? I'm tired of fighting her, when she's a grown woman."  
"So you would go back on your word to Robin?"  
"I am not going back on any word. I promised she would be safe. I cannot honestly promise she will be safe with Gisborne Will. I will not force her hand in this matter." I took my place beside Allan who had been walking toward us, looking a bit dark noticing the way Will was yelling at me. "That is where I stand."  
Allan placed a hand at the small of my back, knowing I wanted my hands free. As silly as it was the little things he remembered made me feel so cared for. He looked over my face and Will's face fully. "What's wrong?"  
"Siobhan knows the only way to keep Marian alive is to send her with Gisborne to be married. Only Black Knights and their families have safe passage out of here. Gisborne asked Marian to marry him. This is her only way out. This is what Robin wanted and Siobhan will not help me."  
"Well forget the marriage option. Gisborne didn't leave. He just came back. Apparently he told Sir Jasper he wasn't going to abandon Nottingham."  
Will and I both turned to him in shock. "What?!"  
The doors of the dining room banged open and Gisborne appeared above the stairs looking over all of us. He found Marian's face and spoke directly to her as if no one else was around. "If I'm going to die, than I am going to die by your side."  
I hated to admit it, but that was one of the best motivational speeches I'd heard lately.  
I kicked up the bow that was at my feet grabbing it quickly. "I cannot believe I am saying this, but right now I can honestly fight beside him without cringing."  
Swords were taken up and those with weapons followed Gisborne outside.  
Gisborne stopped Allan and I. "Allan are you truly going to allow her to fight?"  
Allan met my eyes and nodded. "She picked her choice and if she wants to fight I will never stop her. Siobhan's aim is amazingly accurate and I trust her beside me. You say you would die by Lady Marian's side. Those are my feelings with Siobhan."  
Gisborne's eyes flicked between us before giving a hesitant nod. "Have all the gates been shut? All the barricades secure?"  
Allan's eyes grew a bit at his words. "Sir, didn't you order them back up when you returned?"  
I tugged Allan's hand sliding the bow across my chest. "We can check. The barricade could buy us some time. Allan we need to hurry."  
Allan nodded and we ran as quickly as we could down the steps to check the doors Sir Jasper's army were most likely to come through. "Siobhan, I need to ask you something."  
"Allan, I honestly don't think this is the best time."  
"It might be the only time." He pulled me against one of the market stalls. "Promise me you will tell the truth."  
I tried to wiggle past him, but he had a death grip on me. "Allan we don't have time." I gave a sigh seeing the determination on his face. "If you need to do this right now make it quick."  
"Are you-"  
He was cut off by the sounds of hoofbeats approaching. I felt my throat go dry and blood pounded in my head. "Allan..."  
Without a word he pushed back and practically dragged me through the streets. He called out toward the waiting hall. "They're here! Damn it! THEY ARE HERE!"  
I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt propelling both of us into a small alcove away from the path of the horses. I tried to regain my breathing and took the bow off of me fitting an arrow to it still leaning over. My eye caught a tear in the bottom of the dress. "All day. All day, and now this bloody dress decides to rip?"  
Allan pulled out his sword, giving me a look. "We're about to die and you're worried about your dress? I'm not sure if you're having hysterics or not, because it is you."  
I smacked him on the arm. "Thank you for that. Now what is it you wanted to ask me?"  
"Siobhan, I need to know. This is important to me. Do you-"  
"GISBORNE!"  
I felt my eyes go wide and swiveled my head to the courtyard. The Sheriff was marching past everyone. The Black Knights stood at attention by the order of Sir Jasper who looked completely flabbergasted. The Sheriff called him over making his mark in the book to be sent to Prince John. He turned smacking Sir Jasper across the face and telling him, in no uncertain terms, to get his troops out of Nottingham immediately.  
"GISBORNE! I go away for ONE DAY. ONE DAY and THIS is what happens?"  
He walked past where Allan and I were in the alcove, both still holing our weapons out. "Nice to see we had people willing to fight. Now you two are free to go do whatever you wish." Giving us a smiling nod he headed back up the stairs into the castle.  
I caught Allan gaping after the Sheriff and couldn't help laughing. "Our lives should go down in the stories. This one alone should be retold hundreds of years from now."

* * *

I looked out infront of my cottage at the sunset. "I feel like I gained more than just a year today."  
Arms reached around from behind giving me a slight hug. "I'm sorry that your birthday didn't turn out as well as you could have hoped."  
"We're all alive and that's what really matters. We have you to thank for that Robin."  
He gave me a slight smile. "Well that's why I'm here. Saving England one day at a time. And to deliver your birthday present. I told the others we could celebrate tomorrow and to let you rest, we all need it. Also I noticed Will doesn't have any new bruises. Does that mean the two of you are learning to get along again?"  
"Well he gave me my birthday present so yes." At Robin's look I continued. "He and Allan got along for a good part of the day. That was what I wanted." I turned to him with a smile. "Now what is this present you speak of?"  
With a sigh he gave my forehead a kiss. "It's on your bed. I should probably go."  
"You just got here, I'm not tired yet."  
Robin shook his head motioning down the road. "You have a visitor coming and while I agreed to your terms about neutral territory face to face with Allan isn't how I plan to spend my time here if I can help it. Goodnight Siobhan, happy birthday."  
I watched Robin run out the back door and Allan tied his horse to my post. Amazing the wonderful timing everyone seems to have. One day I plan to make a perfectly timed appearance too. "Hello again. To what do I owe the pleasure?"  
Allan came up the path and pulled me into his arms. "Am I not allowed to just come over and say hello? Give you a hug? Tell you I miss you and I'm glad you are alive?"  
"You almost sound as if you were worried."  
He frowned and slowly turned me so my back was pressed against him and we could watch the sunset. "I do tend to worry. You've given me good reason to in past."  
"Attempting to sacrifice myself to save an entire village is different than doing something stupid. Honestly Allan, it is not as if I go out of my way to hurt myself. Believe it or not there was a time before you where I watched out for myself. I managed to survie, no reason to worry."  
He nuzzled my neck. "Yes, well, I like it better when I can watch over you myself."  
I closed my eyes tilting my head back to rest on his shoulder. My hands followed his arms down to my stomach where I squeeze his hands with my own. "Allan?"  
"Mmm?" He kissed the edge of my ear and pressed his cheek against my temple.  
"You said you needed to ask me a question before." I felt the tension run up his arms and his body tensed behind me. He dropped his chin to my shoulder and I twisted my neck to see his face. "Allan?"  
He sighed and took me by the hand leading me inside toward the kitchen. He hopped me onto the table top and took a seat. Holding both of my hands he carefully ran his thumbs over my knuckles seeming to think. "It was very possible that we were going to die today. I was thinking about this more after you left today. I was going to let you fight beside me because I needed you next to me. I wanted to feel you by my side because if I did live my last moments today I wanted you to be the last thing I saw." He shook his head looking up at me. "Does that make me selfish? Robin said he wanted Marian protected, even if that meant she might have to marry Gisborne. It makes me horrible that I didn't want that for us isn't it?"  
"No, Allan don't say that. It's not true. Robin places Marian on a pedestal too often." He winced at that, but I shook my head. "Listen to me. He places her so high she forgets how far the drop is and constantly dances on the edge. You always treated me equally to the others and that I value. You have kept me firmly grounded, so if I fall the distance is never far enough to hurt."  
Allan gave me a little smile. "You do have a way with words."  
"That I do. Yet you never answered my question. What was it you wanted to ask me?"  
He pulled me toward him and slid me onto his lap. He took a strand of my hair twisting it around his fingers. When we finally locked eyes he gave a slight sigh. "Maybe tonight isn't the night to talk about this. Maybe we should talk another night."  
I gave my head a shake and ran my fingertips over his beard. "Allan, this is something important. You never bring something up that isn't important when death is on the line. Please?"  
"Are you in love with me?"  
I felt like a rabbit caught in a thistle bush and right before me was the fox. "I...I...Allan."  
"I knew I shouldn't have said anything." He went to push me off, but I grabbed hold of his wrist.  
"I'm sorry. You just took me by surprise." I cocked my head to the side giving him what I hope was a comforting smile. "Not being funny but a subject like this is not one that you just jump into. A nice simple conversation that led up into it might have been agreeable."  
"Like I said we can talk-"  
"We can talk now." I stared into his eyes hands still holding to him. "Allan please don't fight with me, I don't want this to turn into one of our conversations where you just run off in the middle of it. I will be as honest as I can."  
He reached out and cradled my cheek in his hand. "I wall _full_ honesty. I've said it before. Love is _not_ always a pleasure."  
"I am being honest for as much as I know. I love you. You take care of me, treat me as an equal, and make me feel so...alive. I just don't know if I am _in_ love with you. Do not misunderstand me Allan. I feel for you, but my time...I need my time." I closed my eyes turning my face into his palm. "I have no idea what I am doing when it comes to you."  
Allan slowly nodded. "That's all I needed to hear."  
I rested my hands on the back of his neck, repositioning myself on his lap. I had to bite back the smile at the look on his face. "Sorry."  
His eyes turned a few shades darker. "Apology not accepted."  
I leaned slightly back. "I don't like that look."  
His fingertips traced a circle on my upper leg, eyes never leaving mine. "So tell me more about this dress of yours. I remember you saying something about silk." He brushed his lips every so gently against mine. His lip movement felt like the silk against my leg. I fell into his eyes images of his lips against my lips, my leg, trailing kisses to-  
My hand shot out stopping his pathway up my leg. I leaned my head back slowly blinking myself back into clarity. "This isn't the time."  
Allan flipped his hand over so it cradled my wrist as he attempted to compose himself. "I'm sorry. Maybe I got a bit carried away. I want to thank you for answering my question." He slid his hand down my wrist carefully looking over my hand. "There is just one more question I need to ask."

* * *

The darkness was settling in as I locked up the front door. I shut the windows and double check the backdoor. My nightly routine, just like always. As I walked into my bedroom I smiled seeing a brand new bow and quiver of arrows on my bed. I moved them to the corner of the room bring a candle over to read the note left behind.

_A most happy birthday to a a lady I've watched grow up, perhaps not gracefully, but very well nevertheless. I do care about you and I like to think if Lily did make it she would have been just like you. Of course in that case I would probably have locked you both away. You always say that is it is thought that counts.  
Happy Birthday Siobhan. May your wishes come true.  
_  
I shook my head with a slight smile at Robin's note. Just like Robin, add a bit of laughter and sentiment as well. Lily... I had thought once or twice what it would have been like if Robin's baby sister had lived past infancy. Perhaps I would have been her childhood companion instead of Marian's, though I am certain we would have all been close friends. What would have been different if Lily had lived? Would Robin still treat me the same way? Would any of this have even happened? After all, Lily would most likely have been married if not at least engaged and therefore been able to take proper care of Locksley in her brother's absence.  
I shook my head and refolded the letter. It was pointless to dwell on things so far in the past. It was not as if there had ever been something I could have done about it anyway.  
I lay back on my bed tracing a finger slowly over my smiling lips. Aside from the fact we had all nearly died, it was a good birthday. Will and Allan got along, the gang was generally in a good mood, Marian was calm again, Nottingham had been saved from the Black Knights, and Tobias was still dead. I saw all of that as a major win in my favor. Another sweet point had been Allan's 'birthday tradition' being fulfilled. My nineteen kisses. I had to admit that part was rather enjoyable.  
I rested my hand on my forehead suddenly frowning at the feel of cool metal twitching against my skin. I brought both hands above my face noticing that they were still shaking from Allan's departing remarks.  
_"You do not have to make a decision now. I just want you to think and know I will always be here for you. You owe me at least a thought."_  
When I nodded he leaned back into the doorframe planting one last brief kiss on my lips.  
He noticed my confused look and smiled. _"You always need one extra kiss for luck."_  
And then he had gone.  
I placed both hands across my stomach closing my eyes. A very interesting birthday, that I would agree to. Now what I needed was some sleep. My fingers twisted around each other and my stomach dropped a bit further. The question was not whether I needed sleep. It was whether or not my thoughts could calm enough to let me.  
Robin hoped my wishes would come true. It wasn't a matter of hoping. It was a matter of whether or not I could accept them.

* * *

******A/N: To be honest I haven't been watching it on Saturday nights. I know, horrid right? I've been watching them online & on demand. Mainly because I haven't been around. Thus spastic updates.**

******I think there should be more reviews, seeing as this has become a favorite story and alerted by people who have not reviewed. :sad face:**

******Onto my thank yous:  
theinstantstar15: Yay fangirl squeal! Yeah I didn't want Will to go easy on her because in the show he really developed a vindictive side.  
x-uRbAn PiXiE-x: It's been so nice talking to you. Did I surprise you I'm American? Hope you have fun on holiday!**

******Cowgirl: I know, I spoil you with updates all of a sudden. Of all the secondary characters in the show, that make brief appearances I adore the Fool and Carter. I can be romantic, that last part is proof. See, I'm not all mean author girl.**


	11. A Chance

**Disclaimer: I do not own any part of BBC or it's presentation of Robin Hood. I am not connected to either in any possible way, no matter what I wish.**

* * *

I crossed my arms looking over my belongings. My eyes drifted over to my jars. I suppose if I wanted to make things hard I could toss out a few smoke bombs at anyone who attempted to drag me out of my cottage. Enough to run out, but my belongings might be hard to bring. That was the only downside to giving Fabian to Francis, moving was a bit harder than it used to be.  
I heard a knock on my door and turned slowly taking out my knife. I simultaneously opened the door and threw the person on the other side up against the doorframe.  
"As nice of a surprise as this is I don't think now is the proper time."  
I growled in my throat taking my knife off Allan's neck. "What. Is. Going. On."  
Allan reached his hands up to loosen my grip on his shirt. "Listen, the Sheriff is planning something. I had no idea they were evacuating-"  
"You call this an evacuation?"  
"Sorry, poor choice of words. They're moving everyone out of the village. I came to tell you that you are safe. You can stay here and no one is going to bother you. Although you have the option of moving into the castle for protection."  
"Why?"  
"Because you're the high seam-"  
"You know what I meant. Why am I allowed to stay in my cottage?"  
"I might have had a part in it. You're practically in the forest so your cottage is barely even part of Locksley. I managed to persuade the Sheriff to let you stay here. Aside from that apparently you're out of range for connivence." He touched my cheek brow furrowed. "Why do you still look like you want to tear my throat out?"  
I smoothed the lines on his forehead with two fingers and let out a sigh. "Allan. This is the only place I have ever had. I've spent all my days here. All my memories are here. And suddenly out of no where everyone is being pushed out. I've never had a problem with change, but this is drastically pushing my comfort level."  
"Stay here. I don't want you to move to the castle and find the same restrictions Marian has. I am doing my best to keep you safe and happy Siobhan. Work with me please."  
"I am not moving to the castle. Not without a fight."  
"I didn't expect you to, but I wanted to give you the choice anyway." He stepped to the side looking at my workroom where I had gathered all of my belongings. In actuality mostly everything I had gathered was the mendings of others. For me I had a trunk that was filled with clothing, what I had left from my parents, and my few personal possessions. Amazing that nineteen years of my life and the things my parents left for me could all be put together in a small trunk.  
He knelt over my open trunk touching the sleeve of my birthday dress. "I am keeping you safe, but with the way things are changing I am not sure about everything you hold dear. Your work for example..."  
"The clothing of everything who has been moved to the forest or another town? I can get the clothes easily, being out of a job is a bit of a let down, but my personal creations..." I looked at Allan giving him my best smile. "Could I borrow a horse?"

* * *

I was muttering to myself as I led my borrowed horse out of the camp only to see Robin and the others coming my way...with company. Usually this was where I threw up my hood, but seeing the direction in which things were headed I didn't bother. Knowing my luck I would end up moving into camp with the others any day now. Amazing how much things could change within a matter of days.  
It had only been a fortnight since my birthday. Things had been calm, slowly getting better and them suddenly this. Families stopped at my cottage to catch their breath before going on their way. I was surprised I hadn't seen Robin already. I'm sure some people must have taken North Road. Unless of course the gang was visiting another village currently. Quite possible since I hadn't seen anyone for about two days now.  
The first thing I noticed was the man John was periodically glaring at. Of course it was hard for my eyes not to immediately go to him. He stood a bit taller than John and his staff was larger and was graced with a morning star on top. Interesting.  
I stroked my borrowed horse's nose noting Robin's raised brow. "Judging by the look you seem a bit surprised to see me. Which means you have no idea what's going on in Locksley. In which case makes me the messenger of bad news. I am getting a bit tired of that title."  
Robin went to open his mouth when there was whistling from behind them.  
I smiled. "Go ahead I'm sure the Nigh Watchmen has some news for you."  
He gave a shake of his head and ran off toward the trees.  
Djaq gave me a little smile. "So what brings you out here?"  
I rocked back on my heels clasping my hands behind my back. "Just moving some items into camp..."  
The gang fell silent while the others gave me a once over. Because I adored having strangers size me up. Although it was always entertaining when they underestimated me.  
Will found his voice first. "You're moving into the camp?"  
"You needn't sound so happy." I rolled my eyes. "I just need to keep some things I hold dear to me somewhere safe until this whole mercenary thing is sorted out." I noticed Will and Djaq shared a look. "So you know about that?"  
"We know about the mercenaries, but there seems to be something we don't."  
"Oh, well then I suppose you should know they've pretty much forced everyone out of the village. Anyone who doesn't have family in other villages are holding up in the forest until they can figure out where to go."  
Much looked at me. "And you?"  
"Still have my cottage, someone was kind enough to argue on my behalf. One of the bright sides to living next to the forest is that it is tactically useless to the bad guys. Besides apparently some of the mercenaries who were complaining about some cramping fell silent after learning the only cottage left was home to the village witch." I grinned. "Never thought I would ever be happy to have that title."  
The tall man whom John had been glaring at gave a booming laugh. "There is a whole army of mercenaries in your village and they're too afraid of a little thing like you to take your cottage?"  
Much winced. "I'd be carful what you say to her Legrand, Siobhan doesn't exactly have a wonderful temper. Especially when her hands are hidden."  
I gave Much a twisted smile. "You know Much, I am never going to be able to make friends if you keep telling everyone how I could kill them so easily."  
The man called Legrand laughed again. "I hate to break it to you, but I am very difficult to kill."  
"As am I."  
Much held up a hand. "Trust me Legrand, you don't want to have a stare down with Siobhan. This is one of the girls Robin and I used to fight with growing up."  
Legrand looked me over eyes twinkling. "So this is Siobhan. The girl with the knives. I can see what you used to say about her is true."  
I thought about asking what he meant and decided against it. It was probably something I was better off not knowing anyway. Instead I strolled over to where John was arranging some stones. "Apparently I've missed quite a lot since I was here last. I didn't realize John's superstitions were back."  
The others followed me over with strange looks on their faces.  
Djaq sank down next to John looking over the circle. "What do you mean Siobhan? I do not recognize this symbol at all."  
John looked up at me as a teacher looks to his student. "Go on little one."  
I gave a momentary frown. "I appreciate my hight being made fun of so much. I did not mean it was a symbol for protection. Though some say it was once a temple. It's the standing stones of Hathis Sir Chief, isn't it?"  
John's face broke into a smile. "Exactly."  
Much shook his head. "I don't get it."  
"Robin will."  
"Siobhan." Robin came into the clearing, tone in his voice letting me know I was going to be sent out on one of his missions. His eyes briefly met a smaller man who seemed out of place with this lot before turning back to me. "If you would be so kind to return to Locksley I would appreciate it. I have a feeling the Night Watchman is planning to make an appearance and I need you to persuade him not to while we are not there to help."  
I gave him a slight nod realizing he did not trust the smaller, well dressed man. I could not think of any other reason for him to call Marian the Night Watchman or 'him' in front of the others. After all Much and Legrand had already made it obvious they fought together in the Holy Lands. Whatever mission they were on must have been very important if King Richard had sent members from his own guard home. "Of course Robin. If there's anything at all you need you know how to find me."

* * *

I saw Marian duck into the storage and heaved a sigh sneaking in behind her, shutting the door quickly behind me. "I honestly did not want to get killed today Marian."  
Marian turned around with a growl. "Is there a reason you are following me?"  
"I suppose Robin didn't think you would listen to him."  
"I said I wouldn't go after him. I made no promises for the Night Watchman."  
I crossed my arms. "That is the weakest argument I think I have ever heard from you. I am exceedingly disappointed. You used to lie much better than that."  
Arms grabbed me from behind and it was only the familiar voice that kept me from lunging. "What are you doing here? Do you want to get us all killed?" He kept his arms tight across my waist and chest, directing his attention to Marian. "Oh, come on. You need to get out of here. You can go now and no one ever needs to know you were here."  
I struggled against Allan's grip, then stopped realizing he was enjoying it. "Do you mind letting go of me so we can get out of here?"  
He released me with a wink before turning back to Marian. "Please Marian? I let a lot of things go, but there's no way I can just look the other way on this one. Did you have to come in as the Night Watchman anyway? You need to get out of here before-"  
The door opened behind us and I rolled under a table to my right watching as Gisborne entered. Marian could escape in her disguise, but my escape would be a little bit trickier.  
Allan did a brief double take, the wheels rapidly turning in his mind. "Guy, I caught the Night Watchman!"  
To which Marian swung a bag of grain at Allan's head throwing him over the table I had been hiding behind. He promptly landed on me, knocking all the wind out of my lungs.  
I gave a little moan and Allan quickly got me up hands touching me to check for any damage. "I swear I didn't mean to land on you."  
"Let's see who you really are." Gisborne was leaning over Marian about to brand her with an iron rod.  
I threw myself over the table, Allan behind me. "Sir Guy, no!"  
Allan grabbed Gisborne's arm to take away the iron, his other arm keeping me back. "Leave it, you've done enough Guy."  
It might have been my presence that made Gisborne still. He slowly looked over Allan and myself before turning and yanking the Watchman's mask off to reveal Marian. "No. Not you. Not you." He crawled backwards before flying out the door.  
Marian let out a shaking breath as she let her head fall back against the ground. "I suppose I should have listened to Robin in this one instance." She sat up looking at Allan. "Help me. Distracted them long enough so I can escape."  
"This place is surrounded."  
"We have to do something."  
"I don't have to do anything." He noticed the dual looks of anger and confusion on Marian's face and my own. "I'm sorry, but if I mess this up with Gisborne I'll have nothing left. You both know that."  
Marian stood, hand on my shoulder. "I could talk to Robin for you."  
Allan gave a hurt laugh and strange smile. "You don't get it do you? Even if I wanted to go back, I couldn't. It's too late." He met my eyes. "I've already been reminded of that once."  
I shook my head. "It's never too late Allan. Will just-"  
Allan shook his head holding his hands up. "I'm sorry. I've done everything I can for you Marian, but-"  
We all looked toward the door Gisborne has just walked through. He locked eyes with Marian walking forward slowly. "A year ago I put this dagger into the Night Watchman's side. Show me."  
I went to stand in front of Marian, but Allan pulled me away. His hands gripped my wrists keeping me from moving forward or going for my knives. I turned my head glaring at him. The downside to being close with Allan and the others was they all knew exactly where to hold me so I couldn't get away. That is the only downside to trusting people, they all know your strengths but your weaknesses as well.  
Marian slowly lifted the bottom of her shirt revealing the scar left from when Djaq and I did all we could to save her. Considering how bad it had been the scar had healed quite nicely.  
Gisborne's eyes went blank as he turned away heading for the door. "Prepare the prisoners, we return to Nottingham. I've sent word to the Sheriff that we've caught the Night Watchman."  
Marian went to move forward. "Guy-"  
He swung around pointing a finger at her. "Do _not_ talk to me." With that he slammed shut the door barking orders to the guards.  
I pushed my shoulders against Allan who only held me tighter. "You're hurting me, Allan."  
He dropped my arms, anger flashing across his face. "He said prisoners, not just prisoner Siobhan. Why do you have to be so difficult when I am trying to keep you safe?"  
I went to open my mouth when four guards entered.  
Allan looked them over before flexing his fingers over the hilt of his sword, seeming to choose his words carefully. It went to show how good of an actor he was that no anger bled into his words. "You are to escort Lady Marian and the High Seamstress to Lady Marian's chambers. Neither are allowed out of the room."  
The guards nodded and came to us, unsure whether we were to be dragged off or not. With a glare in Allan's direction I took Marian's arm as we went with the guards without another word. If I got out of this Robin was going to owe me. Although this 'arrest' was better than my previous ones. At least no one had hit me. Yet.

* * *

"The gallows are being set up." I frowned and moved back out of the window. "What a cheerful day this turned out to be."  
The door opened and Gisborne walked in Allan right behind him.  
Gisborne nodded to Allan. "I need to speak with Marian alone. If you would be so kind..."  
Allan nodded holding his hand out to me.  
I ignored his hand instead pushing out the door past him. I was hoping by some miracle Marian would find a way to get out of this while she had Gisborne alone. She'd done it before.  
"Siobhan, would you at least look at me?"  
"I've been protecting you Allan. Defending you and now you're not even trying to do a single thing to help Marian?" I spit at his feet, and regretted it immediately.  
His eyes flashed and he grabbed my wrist yanking them behind my back as he pushed me against the wall. My elbows were bent as he continued to keep me from struggling to free my wrists. His body was hard pressed against mine and I could feel the silent fury vibrating through him. His voice was low and I could tell it took all his will power to keep it from rising or shaking. "What do you think I have been trying to do? Do you think I haven't been trying to do everything in my power to make this all better? That I haven't been trying to calm Gisborne? Are you forgetting you are being seen as an accomplice as well?"  
I moved my face close to his even though I knew I was pushing his patience to the absolute limit. "I would rather die with my friend than live with people who forget the benefit of taking risks."  
His breath was hot on my face and I could tell this was hurting him. "All you ever had to do was say the word Siobhan. This could have been avoided and you know it. I do not understand you sometimes."  
"We sew our own destiny Allan. Every stitch, every pattern brings us to what our future holds. Fate is never certain. Everything we do changes the course of our futures. They say the Fates hole the thread of our lives. Do you think yourself a Fate Allan? Watching as Marian's thread and mine slide through you fingers?"  
"I would give my life to save you Siobhan. You know that."  
"I do not want your life Allan. I want you."  
Before he could think of a response the door opened and Gisborne walked out. It was as if he didn't see Allan or I, but he spoke orders. The haunted look behind his eyes told me it would be some time before he could again focus. "Allan guard the door. I do not want anyone else on duty here."  
He nodded and let loose his grip on my wrists as well as stepping back.  
He opened his mouth but I pressed two fingers to his lips. Goddess help me I wanted to kiss him so badly. I wanted him to push me against the wall again and never let me go. The problem was the situation we were in. Why was it whenever I could finally be happy something happened to ruin it all? "Don't."  
I shook my head letting my fingers drop and went into Marian's room. I shut the door unable to even meet his eyes.

* * *

I watched from my position behind the trunk as Gisborne went to the window and Allan stomped out the burning coals beside the door. Now was her chance. I gave Marian a nod and she ran from behind the curtains toward the door.  
"Allan get her!"  
Allan's head snapped up at Gisborne's words and he went to grab her. I flew out from my spot, throwing Allan and myself toward the floor. We were rolling on the ground fighting for dominance when Allan finally pinned me properly. He stretched my arms above my head, knees pinning my legs to the floor.  
That was when I began to hyperventilate. This was the same position Tobias had put me in before Allan rescued me. I felt my eyes widen and a whimper escaped my throat. Because suddenly it wasn't Allan looming over me, it was Tobias. Allan's beautiful blue eyes disappeared and were replaced with the wild ones that still woke me up in the middle of the night.  
Allan looked me over before quickly rolling off of me looking disgusted at himself. "I'm sorry, Siobhan. I didn't..." His voice, already a whisper, caught in his throat.  
I gathered my arms around my knees watching as Marian lifted herself slowly from he floor speaking to Gisborne.  
"Did you expect me to sit here and wait to be executed?"  
He ran a hand through his hair angrily. "I expect you to know when you're beaten." His eyes found where Allan was kneeling beside me gingerly touching my hand. "Get out. Get out!"  
Allan took my hand leading me out the door again, this time arms around me and the door slammed shut behind us. "Siobhan, I'm so sorry, I didn't even think. I'm sorry." He buried his face in my hair, voice strained. "Help me help you. Help me think of a way to save you."  
I was shaking violently against his arms. "I don't know, I don't know."  
He lifted my chin delicately pain obvious on his face. "You still have nightmares."  
I looked into his eyes. Back to that warm blue that made me think of home. Home with my parents, safety, and peace. I suddenly felt worse for yelling at him before. How could I yell at the one person who made me feel safe even when he was yelling at me? "Sometimes. Sometimes I just see things that aren't there."  
His eyes widened. "Things that aren't..." He pressed a kiss to my forehead. "You are brilliant. Absolutely brilliant."  
I touched his forehead. "Did you suddenly come down with a fever? You aren't making any kind of sense."  
He gave me a smile and covered it quickly as Gisborne exited again, still not noticing anyone around him.  
"You confuse me Allan."  
The smile returned for a moment as he kissed my palm. "That is my first line of defense. Now back to the room. I need to talk to Gisborne."

* * *

I took position a step behind Marian as we entered the courtyard. "In our next lives, perhaps you'll be a better listener."  
She gave me a weak smile. "Perhaps our roles might even be reversed."  
"I hope not. I like my lower class position. I would hate to have to sit through all the boring dinners you have had to. I do not hold that kind of patience."  
The Sheriff turned to Marian and I. "Ladies, come to see the entertainment?"  
Gisborne nodded to me. "Siobhan, one of the servants told me that the length of fabric you requested is being dried by the well. Thomas said that you had requested to inspect it. I would suggest you go right away."  
I felt my mouth dry and managed a nod. "I had almost forgotten. Thank you Sir Guy."  
I inclined my head to the others and as soon as I was out of their sights ran to the well looking around. Thomas.  
"Well our first son's name is Thomas, for my brother."  
It was a code from Allan. I sat on the edge of the well looking around. Apparently Allan had found a solution.  
"THE NIGHT WATCHMAN! HE'S ESCAPED."  
I looked around wildly and watched as someone obviously not Marian, dressed as the Night Watchman came running toward me. I leapt up from my seat in awe as, with a leap, the mystery person swung their legs over the edge of the well, gripping the top.  
"Siobhan, sit back down!" The voice hissed.  
I obeyed hiding the hands as guards flew past me around the corner of the castle. As soon as they were gone I jumped up watching the arms pull the body out of the well. "Allan?"  
Ripping the mask off his face Allan gave a groan. "That was uncomfortable." He leaned further forward letting his body fall out of the well as he lay on the ground.  
I jumped on him planting light kisses all over his face. "You. Are. A. Wonderful. Amazing. Brilliant. Man."  
"I think you forgot charming and handsome."  
I laughed pressing my hands on his chest, letting my hair make a curtain around our faces. "Fine. Amazing, brilliant, wonderful, charming-"  
Allan slid his fingers through my hair and tightly wrapped his fingers around the roots. He brought my face to his for a rough kiss. "Most importantly, lucky."

* * *

Gisborne and Allan walked through the door, making Marian and I break into smiles.  
Gisborne strode over to Marian. "You're safe."  
"You did all this for me?"  
"Uh..." Allan pointed to his chest looking offended.  
"You both did this for me."  
Allan smiled. "Well what's being chased by angry soldier between friends?"  
Gisborne gave a slight roll of his eyes and nodded at the Night Watchman outfit Allan held. "Burn that. The Night Watchman is no more. You will not get another chance."  
Allan tried to hide his smile. "Where have I heard that one before?"  
Marian giggled as Gisborne glared. "You can go now.  
Marian looked over at me. "May I?"  
I gave a little smile. "Of course."  
She laughed and threw her arms around Allan. "Thank you. You saved my life. I believe I see why Siobhan keeps you around."  
Allan smiled and took my hand leading me into the hall to give the others time to speak.  
I gave his hand a squeeze and a brief smile. "It's nice being out here without you throwing me against a wall."  
Allan's lips curled into a smile. "Here I was under the impression that you liked it."  
I felt the heat creep up my neck.  
The feeling increased as he touched the chain that hung around my neck disappearing into the front of my bodice. "I am never going to push you to do or say anything you aren't comfortable. I was just wondering if you had thought anymore about what I asked you." He hurried on before I could speak. "If now isn't the best time just tell me."  
I twined my hands with Allan's giving him a smile that was not forced at all. I didn't even think about smiling, but I could feel it. "I meant what I said before. I want you."  
I watched as his eyes widened just a bit, their color such a rich blue it made me shiver. "Is that a yes?"  
"On one condition."  
"Anything you want."

* * *

I walked into the camp seeming as if I was on air. "So how went the treasure-" I immediately dropped to the ground, my skits billowing around me. "Your majesty, forgive me."  
"Do you employ many women in your little troop Robin?"  
I heard him laugh. "Your majesty this is Siobhan, High Seamstress. She's been keeping an eye on the village while I was fighting along side your son."  
Queen Eleanor gave a smile from her position on her horse. "You do have some interesting members of your group Robin. Two females. One is a Saracen chemist and the other is a seamstress. Your men are all from different backgrounds. Much has been your friend and servant for all your lives, Will is a trained carpenter." She paused looking over Little John with a gleam in her eyes. "And Big Bear...well, I don't believe I need to say anything else."  
I rose an eyebrow looking at the others. I could see everyone suppressing laughter.  
Robin gave a nod. "You will take the road along to the coast. There will be a boat waiting there for you. Legrand's men will accompany you to your friends in Ireland. And then back onto France."  
Queen Eleanor nodded her head to me. "Are you all right my child?"  
I nodded realizing I must have made a noise in my throat. "Yes, I apologize your majesty. Something about Ireland..."  
"Do you have any family there little one?"  
"Not to my knowledge your highness. My father met my mother on business and she followed him here. She told me tales of growing up and the folklore, but never really family. No one who would be of a high rank as your friends I am sure anyway."  
She gave me a kid smile. "Where was your mother from?"  
"The east coast of Ireland. In Ardee, County Louth."  
The Queen mother smiled. "You are a lucky little one. I will be staying in Dublin, which is less than a day trip away. If you could give me your mother's name..."  
I felt the tears in my eyes and I knelt before the Queen mother. "Your highness, I have no words in which I can possibly thank you."

* * *

I watched with the others as Queen Eleanor and Legrand's men headed off into the distance. I felt eyes on me and turned to see Robin staring at me. "What?"  
He shook his head with a smile. "I will never get over the fact people just flock to you. Do you realize the Queen mother just took down information about your family to check up on them? King Richard's mother, Queen Eleanor of Aquitaine is going off to check to see if you have any family left."  
"People like me. I have no idea why."  
Djaq laughed. "So what did you do today?"  
"The usual. Marian got us in trouble. We were both set to be hanged."  
Robin's eye twitched.  
I gave his cheek a kiss. "We're alive and that's what counts correct?"  
"How did you manage to get out of it?"  
"Are you sure you want to know?"  
He looked me over and gave me a quick sidearmed hug. "No. I think I better not ask."  
I paused as we went to enter camp. "So, why is John Big Bear?"  
I was welcomed to a chorus of laughter and a glare from John.  
He straightened his jacket with a laugh. "You're all jealous!"  
I turned to Robin with a scrunched up nose. "You know I think it's better if we didn't share today's stories."  
"Agreed."  
"Although I do have one question. Legrand and Much mentioned all the stories you used to tell about home while you were in the Holy Lands. What did you say about me?"  
"Well I said I had two very special people waiting for me back home. One I intended to marry and the other was the only family I had left. Both I intended to take care of, both could easily kill me in my sleep."  
"Robin, you do say the sweetest things."

* * *

**A/N:  
Okay so I leave for college in 12 days and I've been trying to spend as much time with my friends as I can before I leave in which I have not been around. I am sorry, but you can understand.  
I am going to finish this before I leave if it kills me. Which it might, but oh well.  
I like this new Reader Tracker they have. Apparently I'm well loved in Canada, Belgium, Thailand, Austria, Australia, Sweden, Czech Revar, Italy, Israel, Ireland, Germany, the Netherlands, the UK and the US. Huh. Good to know...that is kind of mind blowing.  
The real question is where are my reviews from all these readers?  
MMhm, think about that one while I thank the others.**

****

Cowgirl: Thank you. Yes I can be romantic when I am not ripping out hearts. Only two more chapters to spoil you with awww Sadness. Yay fangirl squeals!

QuietOne364: thanks!

**theinstantstar15: Wow school stars early for you, but I suppose I can't say much since I'm leaving soon. Hope it gets better! Haha yes, with me you can never tell. Two more chapters! And yes, we all are angry with the season 2 finale. Let's hope 3 is amazing, though I've heard it will also be the last season so it needs to be.**


	12. A Hope

**Disclaimer: Nope nothing has changed since my last update. I am not affiliated with BBC or the owners of Robin Hood in any way, shape, or form.**

* * *

**Note: Forewarning. This is going to be going back and forth between two views. Also I never got to edit this, I will once I get sleep, but read the A/N.**

I leaned over the pig roast, poking it gently with a knife. It looked about done, would be by the time the others got here. I leaned hands on my lower back trying to stretch out the stiffness. It had been Much's idea to surprise Robin for his birthday this year. We had gotten a barn in Nettlestone Village and while the others we're pretending to bring Robin to an emergency I was waiting behind to prepare the food. Considering how things had been going we all needed something to celebrate.

I turned at the sound of the door opening and smiled. "Hi George. Everything going all right with the preparations?"

He nodded coming over to check on the pig. He lay down a few logs I had asked for. "You sure it's done?"

I got on my knees to poke the underbelly. "Yeah, few more minutes."

"Siobhan I'm really sorry about this."

"Sorry about-"

The last thing I saw was one of the logs swinging toward my head.

* * *

I woke groaning, feeling a pain in my head. I blinked up realizing I had been stuffed in something. My whole world was black. Where was I?

_October 14th. Nettlestone. Pig. George. Log._

Small flashes of memories played across my mind. I had come to Nettlestone for Robin's birthday. George had brought me-George had _hit_ me with one of the logs I had asked him to bring. I was getting a little bit tired of people knocking me out. Of course still being alive proved that was Marian had always said was true. I had a thick head.

The question was _why_ was this happening and where were the others.

There was a sudden explosion and I gave a shout jumping a bit. My enclosure fell over and I realized I was in a barrel. Thankfully a barrel empty except for me. Whoever had tossed me in here didn't bother tying my hands or feet because I was able to lift my hands enough to pop off the top. Huzzah for small victories.

As I slid out I was greeted with weapons all pointed at my face. "Well there's a nice hello for you."

"Siobhan?"

I blinked a few more times clearing my vision of the sudden blinding light to see Robin's face come into form. "Happy birthday Robin."

He gave a grumble and held his hand out to me. "What are you doing here?"

"Well it's your birthday and-" I stopped catching his look. "Ah, the barrel. Well I asked George to bring me some logs, silly me, and he knocked me out. Seems to be happening to me quite a lot this year." I heard the shouting outside and gave a little wince. "The people of Nettlestone were given a large payoff I assume?"

He ignored me and walked forward. Apparently he had already begun a speech and I had interrupted. "Once a few determined Spartans held a pass off against a Persian army."

Will perked up. "Really?"

"It's all about strategy."

"And they lived?"

I wiggled the rest of the way out of the barrel out of the barrel taking John's hand to get back up. "No they didn't, but they lasted far longer than 300 should have against 80,000."

Will's face fell and Much gave him a clap on the shoulder. "I hate that story too."

* * *

Robin put a hand on my shoulder as we looked through the cracks in the barn. "The man with the burn on his forehead is Ellingham. So what can you tell me from the inventory being done?"

"Food and water for a few days if we ration well. If they try to burn us out, food, but not enough water."

"In other words-"

"We're in a great amount of trouble this time. Don't suppose you've thought of a better plan, oh fearless leader?"

"Working on it."

I leaned in toward Robin, speaking low so the others wouldn't hear me. "You don't think there's a way out of this, do you?"

He looked at me for a few moments before returning his attention to the cracks in the walls. "Finish checking the barn to see if you missed anything."

I stepped back, a cold feeling suddenly spreading in the pit of my stomach.

_Meanwhile..._

"_Have they told you why?"_

_Allan sighed. "We're going to Portsmouth Marian. I swear that's all I know. And you didn't get that from me either."_

"_You know what this means?"_

"_No." Although he knew he was about to find out judging by the look on her face._

"_The King. They must be expecting him to arrive at Portsmouth."_

"_It could be anyone for all I know."_

"_That's not good enough Allan."_

"_Marian, I'm not even that high up in the food chain. Yeah, Guy leans on me a bit, but he hasn't told me about any of his Black Knight business apart from what we already know." Saying it aloud made him feel a bit better, but she had a point. Guy was being very secretive about this, but not so obvious to wait for questions. All he said was Portsmouth, nothing more, nothing less. For all he knew it was a formal welcome to a new batch of Black Knights. As bad of news as that could be it was better than thinking this _did _have something to do with the king._

"_Well what if it is the King? What are you going to do about it?"_

"_Well it's not my call is it? I'm just the whipping boy around here."_

"_Look. If you go along with treason, you're committing treason."_

"_Rubbish. If you go along with farting, doesn't mean you farted yourself does it?"_

"_What's happened to you?"_

_Allan stopped mid-step and turned around with a sigh. He hated to think this is what his friends thought about him, but..."I learned what side my bread's buttered on."_

"_What does Siobhan think of this?"_

_He sighed, stomach dropping slightly. "I have no idea. I've been trying to find her all morning." He held up his hands at Marian's look. "Listen Guy only told me to pack this morning. I didn't know about this until today, same as you. I went through the village and her cottage, no one has seen her. I don't like that, but it _is _Siobhan and she might have gone on another one of her new business trips to one of the other villages." _

_Marian nodded. "That's true. She usually leaves rather early so she can be back by nightfall. She didn't tell me about going anywhere, but unless she expects to be gone for more than a day she usually doesn't."_

_Allan nodded. It settled his mind a bit knowing Marian agreed with what he hoped was true. It wasn't as if he _needed _to see her everyday, but it did calm his nerves to see her smiling face. It was amusing and he would_ never_ bring this up with Siobhan, but he had learned all her facial expressions. She would hate to know he was learning what was going on in her head a little bit more than usual. _

_When she was trying to figure out a problem she twisted her mother's ring around her finger, without realizing it. Whenever she fought back her anger, he fingers twitched as if it were against their honor code not to go for their knives. His favorite expression was when it was just the two of them. When it was the two of them together and she was just happy. Maybe it was just a bit of hope on his own part that she had an expression just for him. Then he would keep that hope. Her eyes seemed to sparkler just a little brighter and her lips curved into a smile she never wore around anyone else. It was a smiled he dreamed of at night._

_She was his worry stone, and had been the only thing that kept him getting up every morning._

_Marian's voice brought him back to the present. "Allan?"_

_He shook his head. "Sorry. Listen Marian. We aren't leaving yet, but I am worried I won't see her before we leave. Can I leave a message for her with you?"_

"_Of course. You don't want to leave her a letter?"_

_He shook his head. "It's a short message. She would kill me if I wrote it down and only left her that much."_

"_All right, what is it?"_

"_Just tell her...Tell her that I love her and nothing could keep me from coming back for the solstice."_

"_The winter solstice?"_

_Allan couldn't keep back a little smile. "She'll know what I mean."_

I closed the door after Much fell back inside. "Well that was amusing at least. You know it might have worked if you ran out there naked."

Everyone stared at me.

"Oh come on. You know I have a point." I crossed my arms leaning back against the door. "Just trying to lighten the mood a bit. Sorry."

Djaq gave a huff. "I don't understand. What kind of soldiers are these? They aren't doing anything."

Robin moved from the crack in the door he'd been watching. "That's the problem. They're not soldiers, they're mercenaries. No passion, just pay."

John nodded. "That is why they do not fight. They do not wish to die and lose any of their number."

Will looked up confused. "So they're just going to wait?"

Robin stared at the ceiling. "That's right, and we can't escape from here. They're just going to wait until we come out."

Much swung his sword down. "And then kill us. Not even a conversation."

Robin shook his head and gave a laugh. "I don't know why I didn't think of this before. It's my birthday. Let's celebrate, let's eat!"

I smiled at him. Even in the end he would take it gracefully. "Let's enjoy the music."

Everyone stared at me again.

"Fine. I'll just be keeping my mouth shut. By the goddess I think I know what it feels like being Much."

At least that had earned me a few smiles.

"Lad's I've got a proposal. If they don't come to us. We go to them."

John stood still. "When?"

"At first light."

Will looked up twirling his ax. "There's too many."

Djaq nodded. "We'll die."

Much looked shocked. "Suicide."

I shook my head realizing where Robin was going. "An honorable death. The most honorable death is when you know you are going to go down, go down fighting."

John caught on. "A good day to die."

Much leapt up from his seat. "Why does he always say that? I don't even know what it means!"

Robin stood beside me, glad I understood. "It is exactly what Siobhan said. We're almost certain of dying. But at least we'll go down fighting. That is honor. We can keep that at least."

Will nodded. "I'm in."

Djaq followed. "Me too."

John inclined his head as well.

I gave Robin a smile as he looked at me. "As if you had to ask."

Much looked around. "And me."

Robin let his hands drop. "Good. Good."

Djaq spread out her hands with a slight smile. "Than tonight is a Kalila and Dimna Night."

Will followed her back to seats we had around the fire pit. "A what?"

"You don't have Kalila and Dimna?"

Much shook his head. "Surprisingly not."

"Kalila and Dimna night you remember for your whole life. You must speak only the truth. You must ask all your questions, share all your dreams, confess all your secrets."

"It's just talking?"

"Yes, but it's real talking. And if you are too boring, someone shouts, "Kalila!" and you lose your turn." She smiled at Much. "You start."

"Oh no."

"Just talk. You like talking."

"I know I do, but not like this."

"Fine. Then I'll start."

I smiled and took a seat across from her, pulling Robin to sit beside me. "I think I like this tradition. Too bad I didn't know about it before..."

_Meanwhile..._

"_Allan. Allan!"_

_He walked forward to Marian dressed in her chains. He winced at her expression, but she couldn't sway him. It was her own fault she was in this situation. If she could have just help her tempter a bit longer..._

"_You can't go through with this Allan."_

"_I can. You heard him. Robin's finished."_

"_Not if we can get away."_

_He turned his head shushing her. The last thing he needed was for the Sheriff or Guy to overhear this conversation._

"_Look go back to Nottingham. We have to help him."_

"_Allan?"_

_Allan turned his head hearing the Sheriff looking for him. "Coming."_

_Marian lowered her voice, racing on. "Allan I've been thinking."_

"_Marian please. I need to go." With that he turned away ignoring the way she continued to hiss after him._

"And I admire you. I all of you. You are good men." Djaq smiled at me from her perch. "And you are a good woman and a better friend I could never hope to have. You are all brave, kind, generous, and decent. I love you. All of you. And I am proud to be amongst you."

Much grumbled. "Is this all this is? Everyone saying they love each other?"

"Wait. And you're filthy and you stink and you have no souls."

I turned my head laughing into Robin's shoulders. The truth was I was getting a little teary eyed at all of this. Djaq had given us her whole life story before saying why she loved being with us. The last bit was perfectly correct and I couldn't help myself.

I felt John frown at both of us. "That was a bit much."

She laughed. "I have to be honest. I have to be honest..." I watched her face sober slightly as she looked down at her hands. "And if I am being honest. I have to say I do not love all of you in the same way."

Much frowned. "It's me isn't it? You love everyone but you don't love me."

I tilted my head on Robin's shoulder giving her an encouraging smile. I had know for some time and at the look Djaq gave me back she understood she had my blessing.

Djaq ran a hand over her mouth giving me a nod in thanks. "There is one I do love more than the others. The way to bird would fly two thousand miles through storms just to be with the one he loves. That is the love I feel. And I am a fool, for it is only now when we are about to die that I have the courage to admit it even to myself." She shot me a quick look. "Even after a friend opened my eyes to the truth I couldn't admit it." Her eyes slowly went back to their proper place. "I'm sorry. I should have said earlier. You Will Scarlet are strong and true. And you fight for what you believe in. I love you."

"And I love you." I watched as Will's faced changed. It was fierce, but fierce in happiness. He was truly happy. "I love the way you say what you mean. I love your silly voice."

"Silly voice? That's it. I take it back, all of it. I hate you." But even through the tears and laughter you could see the absolute relief on her face.

"And I love the way you fight like a man. Ferocious. And the way you will always be a woman."

Much stood, throwing off his blanket. "Kilima. Boring."

Djaq's eyes were all for will, but she still let out a little laugh. "Kalila."

"Whatever."

A little part of me broke watching the two of them, but only a little part. It wasn't so much jealously of Djaq, but of the two of them. Happiness.

And that's when I let out a little sob.

Djaq's face fell. "Siobhan, I-"

I shook my head already feeling the tears down my eyes. I quickly wiped them away. "I'm fine with it all. I promise. I'm just so...happy to see you happy."

She moved from her seat to give me a hug. "Thank you my friend."

"I'm just glad you both finally said it before I had to. About bloody time you came to your senses."

"John?"

"No."

Will frowned. "Come on John."

Djaq's voice was low and soothing. "Who do you love?"

"You. All of you." He pointed over his shoulder at Much. "Even him. I love you all, all right?" He got up and walked toward the door head down. He was silent for some time. "And Alice. Shouldn't have let her go. And my boy little Little John. I should have made them stay."

Robin looked up seeing his pained friend. "John you didn't have a choice."

"Let me speak. Leaving Alice was...running to the forest was wrong. Wrong. That's why I'm a huge ugly, stupid, useless coward."

I looked up shocked. "John-"

"That's why I'm always saying it Much. Today's a good day to die? Because for me it is. I deserve to die. I left the people who loved me. The two people who should have been able to depend on me. My wife and child! What was I thinking?"

Robin looked up, arm still wrapped around my shoulders. "John. I'll not let you talk like this."

"I'm going now. I'm not waiting for tomorrow. Let's move this cart." He pressed his back against the cart trying to move it, but failing. "I need to die. I want to die."

Will walked over giving John a strange hug and attempted to calm him down.

Much looked around and focused on Djaq. "Is this supposed to happen? This Kalila and Dimna thing? Because it's weird."

John finally sat back down and everyone was still minus Much who seemed to pace behind us.

I watched as he moved and spoke directly to Djaq. "Look I am not going to do this because I'm not in love with anyone else and I don't hate myself."

She nodded. "Fine."

"Fine. Well there's nothing to say then."

Robin bowed his head a bit more muted laugh coming from his closed lips.

"What?"

Robin looked up. "What?"

"You're smiling."

Robin looked down at me, my head resting on his shoulder. I just needed someone to lean on. Robin had been like an older brother to me for all these years, and he was the best person to go to for comfort. Normally I might go to Djaq or maybe John, but after the confessions made tonight I though Robin was my best bet. Well the one who would make me feel most comfortable, perhaps less guilty as well.

I gave him a little smile. "Well you are smiling."

He shook his head looking back at Much. "I'm smiling because it's usually a struggle to shut you up."

Much turned around dramatically as usual. "You think I talk to much. I know you do, don't try to deny it. 'Much talks too much and eats too much and worries too much.' Well it's easy for you. You just breeze through life. You never have to worry about the little things like the fire. Or the food. Or your birthday cake. Or anything. Well I'll tell you something. You take me for granted."

"Much-"

"You're sniggering. Well you shouldn't! And I'm angry." He fell silent for a few moments composing himself. "And just because I love you doesn't mean I can't hate you too. Because in the Holy Land there was just the two of us. And we were a team. And the things we went through and the horrors we saw we went through _together_. And when we came home we were like brothers. Brothers in arms. And where is that now, eh? It's gone, that's where! You never talk, you just don't. And you made me a free man and we're meant to be equals. But we're not equals. The only thing that's changed around here is you still treat me like a servant, not like your friend."

"That's not true. Is it true?" He looked around to us for conformation and fell silent.

Much walked away shaking his head. "Kalila."

_Meanwhile..._

_Allan snuck into the barn to see a smiling Marian. Now he felt worse. "Don't thank me just yet. I couldn't find a key."_

_Her face froze, but only for a moment. "You need to go."_

"_But what about you? You crossed the Sheriff now."_

"_I'll be fine. Allan, I've been thinking...It's Robin's birthday. Siobhan had said the others were throwing a party for him, and at some point she was going to persuade Guy to let me over her house for a while, to take me. Allan. That means Siobhan is in Nettlestone with the others. Go, save Robin, save the others. Save our Siobhan."_

_His heart fell with every word, but he gave her a nod and grabbed a horse. Hopping onto the saddle the rode quickly into the night toward Nettlestone. "I don't know who I'm suppose to be praying to, I'm a bit rusty at the whole praying thing as it is. So I guess I'll just send this up there to whoever can help me. I've been trying to change, I've been trying to do what's best. I will give anything...everything if you keep the gang alive. Keep everyone alive. Let me see my Siobhan alive."_

We all sat around in silence. The utter tension around the fire was wearing me down. My head still rested on Robin's shoulder, his arm around me comforting both of us, but I think it was the silence that finally broke me.

"I'm in love with Allan." I sat up straight meeting all the looks around the fire. "Djaq said we had to be honest so I am. I am completely sure that I am in love with him." I wiped my eyes and gave a small laugh. "I tried not to believe it, but I am. The way I trust him, the way I feel when I'm with him, the way...the way he looks at me."

Djaq leaned forward. "Does he know?"

I slowly pulled the chain I wore out of my bodice. I heard her gasp as I fingered the ring I had threaded through it. It had an intertwining, elegant band with a sapphire set simply in the middle. I swallowed a few times before I could fine my voice, though it was shaking. "He asked me to marry him."

If I thought the silence was this before, it suddenly became suffocating.

"What did you say?" Djaq's voice was low, almost afraid to speak.

"I said I had a condition. He would give me until Winter's Solstice to make my choice. I needed to know I was _in_ love with him. Loving him wasn't enough for me to answer. I needed to know I was in love with him without any doubt." I raised my head looking around, tears back. "And I told him I wished I could get a blessing from my _family_ first."

Djaq came to me first and we threw our arms around each other. It was horrid that we finally came to our senses too late. At least she and Will could spend their last hours together.

I moved my head back seeing Robin.

He touched my cheek. "Does he make you happy?"

"He makes me happier than I ever though I could be." I bowed my head, but looked up at him from beneath my lashes my voice low. "He makes me feel safer than I've ever been."

Robin gave a sigh and kissed my forehead. "All I ever wished for you was your happiness."

John turned me and took my chin. "You would think he would ask permission first."

I gave a hiccup of a laugh throwing my arms around him. "I know you can't love him again, but I just wanted...I don't know."

Much coughed into his fist before pulling me up into a hug. "You're growing up. Off fighting for England and now engaged. Where has the time gone?"

"I'm always going to be the little girl who followed you and Robin around Much. After all I am still doing the same thing." I turned slowly, rubbing the heels of my palms across my face to get rid of the tears.

I saw Will and my hands dropped to my sides, neither of us moving closer to the other.

He watched my face carefully before speaking. "You feel safe with him?"

"Yes."

"He loves you, I know that. The question is...is his love enough for you?"

I heard the real meaning. He wanted to know if he loved me more than Will had been able. It was a question I don't know if either of us had ever really wanted to ask aloud. There was always going to be a slight twinge of pain in my stomach when I thought of how it could have been. It was hard, but I managed to meet his eyes without flinching. Though I admit that my voice was a touch too soft and low. "Yes."

Will came forward and touched my cheek, brushing a few stray tears away with his thumb. "Isn't that all that matters?"

I found my voice after that backhanded comment. It was meant to sound nice, but Will was being himself. He was questioning if it mattered what anyone else though, because he knew I would just do whatever I wanted. I jerked my face away from him. "Nothing anyone could stay could make me not love him Will. I just wish...I wish before we all die you could all just be happy for me. You don't have to like it."

I saw Will's face fall. "I didn't...I'm sorry Siobhan. I should not have said that. You are right. I'm happy you found someone who loves you how you should be loved." He grabbed me into a tight hug. "I'm sorry I couldn't take care of you, but I'm glad you had Allan. I'm glad he has been around to make you happy."

I started laughing hugging him back. "Will Scarlet, you are the most infuriating person in the world." I pulled back giving him a smile. "But I am so thankful you are my friend."

He gave my forehead a kiss. "Always."

And that was when I broke down. John gently lifted me into his arms and sat me beside him by the fire. I had gotten the blessings I wanted, but for some reason that made the hurt and pain of never seeing Allan again a thousand times worse.

I touched the dirt to the back. "And I bring up back. Anyone who is suffering I will kill outright so you will never have to be tortured. No matter what they would promise you, you would never live in the end. I'll do what I can."

Robin met my eyes across the circle. It had been an unspoken agreement many soldiers made with each other. Unspoken until now. I was sad to have to say it aloud, but I knew I had to. I had to give us some peace of mind.

After my little breakdown Robin had taken me aside telling me about this. He made it look to the others as if he was just comforting me, but I think they all knew he needed to ask this of me. I was the only one who was left that could carry out that promise of not letting the others suffer. I was the only one that had enough missing inside them to do it. I had been missing something for a long time and I could kill my friends to save them from a worse fate. I would be able to put a blade through them thinking only of making it a quicker death rather than think that I was the one killing my friends.

Djaq spoke softly from behind us. "First light."

Much took in a deep shaking breath. "This is it. This is really it. Forget what I said. I don't want you to die remembering me that way."

Robin tapped his arrow into the ground. "Hey. I will remember you as my loyal friend." He sighed. "Let's get the weapons ready. As soon as there is light to see by we go."

John watched Robin stand and leaned a bit harder on his staff. "No. No."

Robin turned angrily. "John we have agreed on this."

The large man slowly shook his head. "You have not spoken. It's your turn."

"We have a few moments left on this earth. Let me have my thoughts to myself. I will share them with you in the next life."

Djaq shook her head. "Robin if there is a heaven, yours is different from mine."

I gave a slight nod. "We have different teachings Robin. My Otherworld is welcome to all from my teachings tell, but I don't think I am very welcome in your heaven."

Much looked up at his friend. "What if there isn't a heaven?"

"It's first light." Robin was going to do his best to ignore the question.

"Robin." John said his name gently, as if trying to reassure the younger man.

"You know my thoughts. They are for the poor. They are for you. And they are for Marian...the woman I love. The woman I recently gave a ring too."

"You're engaged?" Djaq said it as if unsure whether or not to congratulate.

Much and I both nodded as the others looked around for confirmation.

"The woman who makes me believe by some twist of fate we might see this through. And Much I have betrayed your friendship and I think you know why. You see I cannot face the terrors we saw. I can't. Because I'm not as strong as you. I have to put them out of my mind because if I don't than I wouldn't be able to lead. I mean I wouldn't even be able to..."

"Wouldn't be able to what?"

"You won't be able to shoot." John's face because suddenly clear as if everything suddenly made sense.

"Shoot? Of course he can shoot." Much was looking at John as if he'd never seen him before. Apparently I wasn't the only one slightly confused.

"No John's right. In the Holy Land the men we saw...in bits. Screaming. Every time I raised my bow I'd see them. I'd hear them. And whether it was right or wrong, what we did. It makes no difference. So I have to try, not to kill. I have to avoid killing. I mean God gave me a gift with bow. I can kill a man with my eyes closed. I can hit a man from a thousand yards. I have to try, with everything in my power not to. And that's why I wasn't there for you in your hour of need my friend, because I have to let those memories go. I just have to be free."

"Why didn't you say?"

Robin shook his head. "It doesn't matter. In a few moments we'll be free forever."

They embraced like the long lost brothers they truly were.

Much broke the hug with a strangled cough. "Well. Here's to freedom."

Will nodded. "Here's to the poor." He inclined his head toward myself and John. "To all the good people we leave behind."

John gave a slight nod. "We are Robin Hood."

There was a murmured reply of everyone echoing John like a prayer.

Robin looked at us all. "Thank you my friends."

He turned to me and carefully threaded his fingers behind my neck undoing the clasp on my necklace.

We all fell silent watching as he weighed the engagement ring in his hand.

Robin looked up and took my hand sliding the ring carefully onto my finger. "I'm sorry I wasn't there to give you away and I'm sorry we will never get to see the future any of us wanted. The most I can give is this peace of mind to you. For both of us. That is my gift to you. A peace of mind." He looked up at the others. "All I can give you is a peace of mind that we have not done all of this in vein. We may not have the futures we wanted, but we have fought for the futures of others. Never forget what we have done."

_Meanwhile..._

_Allan rubbed his hands together in a seemingly bored manner. In reality he was doing everything in his power to stop them from shaking. He saw the mercenaries just waiting outside the barn and something lightened in his chest. They wouldn't still be here if the others were dead._

_He approached the man he figured might be in charge and put on a smile. "Morning. Allan a Dale, Gisborne's man. Uh, I'm looking for Ellingham."_

"_That's me."_

"_Sheriff sent me down to take the prisoners back to the castle."_

"_Oh no. Sheriff says to stay out here, til they rot, then they come out and get shot."_

"_Yeah, well there's been a change of plan."_

"_Why?"_

"_Well it turns out they might have some information he needs." Allan lowered his voice a touch, trying to get Ellingham to trust him on this. "I think it might be, you know, Black Knight stuff. I mean you'd be paid in full obviously."_

_Ellingham stared at him for a few beats and nodded._

_Allan turned to the doors heart nearly bursting. He just needed to get in there. Just needed to know they were all alive. His friends. The friends he'd missed so much. And the woman he loved. Siobhan. Siobhan who he would give up everything for. God, just to hold her another second longer, kiss her another time. Why hadn't he been living like that before? Yes, all their time together was precious, but he hated how their last parting wasn't what it should have been. He should have made her stay. Just grabbed her and not let her go. Run away with her. Anything._

_Allan licked his lips finally getting to the door, breathing a sigh of relief as the mercenaries all started moving back. he banged on the door, keeping his voice clear. "Open up. I'm here on behalf of the Sheriff."_

_The door opened and his breath came out in a whisper. "Oh thank god."_

_He was immediately pulled in and the door swung shut violently behind him._

_It didn't matter. What mattered was what was before him. The people he cared most about all alive. And the one he loved most standing just a few feet in front of him, face stained with tears and looking at his as if wondering if he was real._

_Even with her face raw and shaking she was beautiful. She was there. She was alive._

This was one of those moments, maybe_ the_ moment. At least once in your life, more than that if you are truly lucky, something like this happens. The world falls silent and time slows to an almost complete halt. It's a moment you both fear and long for.

Allan came though those doors and our eyes immediately locked. His face flooded with relief as he began to walk toward me.

He didn't get far.

It took a moment, maybe less, for me to run into his arms and capture his lips with my own. I could feel his surprise, but he _never_ once staggered. He was firmly grounded and I _loved_ him for it. His arms were keeping me pressed so tightly against him I thought I might pass through his clothes. Hands gripped my arms just above the elbows so tightly, and his fingers seem fused to my skin. Allan was pressing so deeply into me, it was as if he was trying to prove to himself that I really was real.

I dropped my lips slowly from his, tilting my head back to stare into his eyes, They were my favorite shade today, the crispest, crystal blue I usually only saw when we were alone.

I found my voice, only just barely. "I knew you would find a way back."

Allan loosened his grip on me, moving one hand to cradle my face. "I would never leave you. I told you I would always find you. I promised I would never abandon you."

Encouraged by his own words he turned to the others. He had released me, but kept me close. "I would never abandon any of you. I admit we have a slight problem outside. A problem in the form of crazed mercenaries."

John snorted but did not say anything. Apparently my words last night had saved Alan from being attacked on the spot.

Goodie. For once someone was going to let me have my way. No immediate death for the man I had just revealed my deep love for.

I saw Allan catch sight of Robin and he twined his fingers with mine. One might think that even this late in the game Allan was being a smart ass, but I knew better. It was a peace offering. Allan's right hand, his sword hand, was holding my own. He was trying to prove to Robin he meant no harm.

I watched as Allan flexed his fingers, his eyes falling to my hand. In a trance his thumb brushed slowly over my knuckles and touched the sapphire of our engagement ring. His eyes met mine, question obvious. In answer I curved slightly more into his side and returned my eyes to Robin who was still watching. There were a million things I wanted to say, but I just couldn't.

Robin had crossed his arms and was unable to keep the glare from his eyes. Although I do admit when he saw what Allan had done, something passed behind his eyes I couldn't quite decipher. Though I did note a slight relaxation in his shoulders, as if there had been a ton of tension running through him. Yet it was the arm crossing that I appreciated the most. That was true loyalty to me on his part. The fact his hand wasn't itching for his sword or bow let me know that if we ever did make it out of here I would owe him big time.

I saw a muscle in Robins jaw twitch as he responded to Allan's slightly overly obvious statement. "We've noticed."

Allan held up his hand in surrender, slowly releasing my own. "Listen, I know you all hate me, but let me help you. I've been an idiot, I know and I'm sorry. We don't have a lot of time. We need to get out of here before they realize my lie out there. Trust me. Listen we've got work to do. The Sheriff and Gisborne are headed to the Holy Land. They're going to get a boat from Portsmouth. They're going to kill the king."

Robin looked at all of us then nodded. "Right. We've got to get out of here. Now."

Allan led us out along a rope, all of us pretending to be tied to portions of it.

Ellingham walked forward. "So you're bringing the prisoners to the castle are you?"

Allan slowly nodded never really stopping, but falling into a slower step so we were in touching range. "Yeah I am. I already told you that."

"Funny you should say that because a little birdie told me that the Sheriff left yesterday."

"You're joking. Did he? Huh." Allan was trying to think of something quickly, but I could tell there was no brilliant idea bubbling up.

"GET THEM!"

We threw down the rope everyone pulling out a weapon. I realized a moment before a guard charged me I only had my daggers. This was not good.

I fell to my knee shoving two blades into his stomach before thrusting upward. I rolled quickly out of the way, pulling back my blades as I watched the man fall, blood staining the ground. I crawled backwards in a bit of shock. I'd killed before to defend myself, but it had never been as close as that. It had never felt anything like that before.

"Siobhan!"

I lifted my head and quickly rolled to the side as another guard charged me.

Allan appeared right behind him running a sword through his stomach forcing him into the wall. "She's with me mate."

He withdrew his sword quickly and gave me a hand up. I grabbed the fallen man's sword rewarding Allan with a smile. "You always did have the perfect timing."

He danced around me, back pressed against my own as I heard the clanging of swords just behind me. "Just like old times."

I gave a laugh keeping with his movements. "We always worked well together."

We spun around like practiced dancers until all the mercenaries around us had fallen.

Much looked up at Allan with a smile. "Nice to have you back."

Allan smiled taking my hand. "Glad to be back." He gave my knuckles a kiss, eyes all for me. "More than ever."

Ellingham spread his arms wide outlining the lines of mercenaries just now coming over the hill. Re-enforcements, lovely. "I told you, you were going to die."

"And we told you. Not today." Robin appeared on horseback bringing with him a horse for each of us.

I grabbed hold of the saddle horn, hoisting myself up on the horse. I was riding along side of Allan and couldn't help but think that maybe I would get the kind of future I had been hoping for.

I pulled my horse around as the others made a small circle around to discuss our next move.

Much looked to Robin. "To the camp then?"

Allan shook his head. "there's no time. Listen, there's something I haven't told you. The Sheriff and Gisborne have Marian."

Robin's eyes bulged out of his head. "WHAT?"

"She wanted to save the king. She couldn't find you so she tried to kill the Sheriff and got caught."

I watched as Robin's eye twitched. "He's right. We haven't got time. We have to go to the coast, now."

I swung my horse to block his path. "My cottage. Robin I would not ask, but for medicine and money…"

He nodded his head. "It is on the way, there is time enough for the essentials, but you must hurry."

I nodded my head and led the way to my cottage, taking the quickest path and calculating all in my cottage in my head.

I had thrown money, all my medicines, and grabbed an extra satchel containing extra clothing to mend for wear during our journey. I know Robin said the essentials, but we would be on ship for a long amount of time and extra clothing was a must.

I slipped the last of the jewelry I had left into one of the pouches in my sleeve when I stopped, peering at a small pouch at the bottom of my trunk.

I thought back to what I had said to Matilda earlier in the year. If everything had dreamed of would come true I was suppose to travel on the water. My dreams were coming to reality. I picked the pouch up gingerly tying it carefully to the inside of my sleeve. This was one part of my past I had to take with me in order to leave behind.

I don't know if anyone else would understand, but I know if Matilda was here she would tell me I was doing the right thing.

"Siobhan, I hate to rush you, but we have to go."

I turned around watching as Allan looking me over from the door. "I know. I was just closing the trunk."

He moved forward taking my hand, thumb once again touching on the stone of our ring. "You decided definitely then?"

I moved my fingers so they fell between his. "I knew it when you first asked. I just needed to know I was ready. I needed to know…"

"That I wasn't going anywhere." He didn't sound happy, but I knew he understood. "How did I finally convince you?"

I tugged on his hand heading outside. I noticed the others were waiting and we were down two horses. "What did I miss?"

Robin shook his head. "I know we all have some coin, but it never hurts to have some extra. Since I don't think you or Djaq mind sharing horses with your others…"

I gave a nod. "Of course. I have everything we could need, sorry for the hold up, but I see it worked out to the selling point."

Allan swung up onto his steed holding his hand to me. I took it lightly and he swung me up behind him. I hadn't even property positioned myself before we were off. I could understand though. If I was in his position I would want to be on my way as quickly as possible.

I shut my eyes leaning my cheek against Allan's shoulder. I breathed in his scent letting my heart slow. I had him again. He was here with me, something I didn't believe would happen again.

Allan's voice broke my thoughts. "You didn't answer me before. What finally convinced you?"

I rubbed my cheek along the back of his shoulder, almost hoping I could fall into him. "I realized it when we last said goodbye." I gripped him tighter trying to emphasize my point. "I meant what I said Allan. Anything you could want from me I would give you without a second thought. You've been so patient with me in times where you should have just given up."

I felt one of his hands grip both of mine knotted together and placed them right over his heart. "I never gave up on you. I could never give up on you. You are my everything. My heart is yours to do with it what you want. It's always been with you."

"The last goodbye…" I left my words trail off.

I knew Allan was thinking the same thing I was. I could feel his steady heartbeat under my fingers and it soothed me even though we were riding so quickly through the trees to make it to the coast. I was there, but I was also in a memory.

_I was in Allan's room running my fingers along the edge of his desk while he looked out the window. I have always loved watching his profile at the beginning of sunset. His shoulders relax whenever it is just the two of us, but at sunset he truly relaxes. I never brought it up with him, but I think I knew why. It was because another day of work for him has ended and now I'm with him. This is our precious time where he can truly be himself._

_I had gone up behind him, waiting until his shoulders had relaxed. I always waited. I knew he cleared his thoughts during that time and I wouldn't dream of interrupting him for the world. But as soon as his shoulders were down, as soon as the tension was gone I needed him. I slid my hands up his back before tracing my fingers down his arms. Allan would come back to life, turning around and take me in his arms._

_This time has just been a bit different._

_He took me in his arms, but did not have his usual smile. This smile seemed sad and so far away from where we were. He kissed my eyelids and followed the line of my neck with parted lips. His nose brushed a sensitive spot on my neck and I let out a little noise that brought his face back to mine._

_I tilted my head watching his eyes carefully. "Allan, what's the matter?"_

"_Do you want to be with me?"_

_I sighed, fingers tangling together with the fabric of his shirt. "Please do not start this again. I cannot express it anymore clearly. I do love you Allan. I promise you with all my heart I do. I just…"_

_Allan stared at me as I fell silent. "Just what?" He wasn't angry but the obvious confusion leaked into his voice._

_I blinked up at him feeling as if I was doing something wrong. "I need to wait Allan."_

"_Engagement Siobhan. That is all I asked. You can wait for a wedding, wait as long as you need. I just want to know why you won't agree to the engagement."_

_I couldn't meet his eyes now. It wasn't just confusion, it was hurt. I really was hurting him. "I haven't had anyone left in a while Allan." I pressed a finger to his lips stopping whatever he was about to say. "Please, let me have my say. Family wise, I have had no one whom I could relate everything back to. Matilda wished me to be happy and have all the children she knows my mother would want me to have. She listens, but she doesn't understand. Francis knows I always do what's best. He won't argue with me because he knows my instincts are for the best. I wanted Robin to at least…to at least attempt to understand."_

_Allan moved my finger from his lips. "Do you really need his approval?"_

"_Not his approval, just his…blessing. He doesn't have to like it, but at least a blessing from him to let me be happy. That's all I ask for."_

"_And if he doesn't?"_

_I watched as he kept his face perfectly blank. I knew I needed to take care of what I said next. "If he doesn't than he doesn't. I hope he does. I want to approach when he's in a good mood. If he doesn't than he doesn't Allan. My choices are not based on whatever Robin says."_

"_If he said no, what would you do? Would you still be willing to be with me? Leave behind Robin? Leave behind what you've grown to know?" He kept his voice even and face still perfectly blank._

_I laid my fingers flat against his chest pressing myself further into his arms. I tilted my head up making sure he could see into my eyes. Even if he thought I could lie to him, looking into my eyes would tell him everything. "Allan, I love you. Robin could never change that. He could threaten to banish me from the camp and I wouldn't change my mind. You cannot just forget someone. You cannot just stop loving someone."_

_He tilted his head, speaking so his lips touched mine with every syllable. "All of that, your childhood friends and family for me? I don't want to change your mind, but I would die if you hated me for making you choose."_

_I slid one hand to touch the side of his face. "There's no choice when it comes to love."_

_Allan gripped me tighter, taking my mouth within seconds. I melted against him feeling like I was home. The rest of the world didn't exist when it was just the two of us. _

_I moved my lips from his, face pressed into his cheek, trying to remember how to breathe. "I should go."_

"_Why?"_

_I brushed my face back from his, slowly moving out of his arms. "I have a long day tomorrow, I should try to get some sleep." I gave a half laugh. "Try being the key word."_

_I watched as something went behind his eyes, hand still holding my own. It looked like he was debating a question within his head. As if he wanted to tell me to stay. I waited staring at him to see if he would say it. _

_Allan opened his mouth then shut it, brining my hand to his lips to place a soft kiss against my knuckles. He brushed a strand of hair behind my ear and trailed his fingers down my neck. I watched as he traced a finger down the chain about my neck, following it as it disappeared beneath my dress. His finger still followed the chain, but from the exterior of the dress until he found what he was looking for. _

_A smile tugged at the corner of Allan's lips noticing the ring was currently pressed just over my heart. "If it can't be on your hand I am glad it's against the next best place."_

_I kissed the tips of my fingers and pressed them against Allan's lips. "We'll talk again. Try to sleep."_

_Once again I watched as that image appeared behind his eyes. He truly looked as if he wanted to tell me to stay. I didn't know what had changed in him. I had never seen Allan look this lost. Yet, he said nothing. He simply nodded and walked me out to the gate without another word._

We arrived at the coast and Robin ran ahead to set our plan in motion. Allan slid off the horse before me and held out his hands to help me down.

As I slid into his arms, his pressed a gentle, but needy kiss against my lips. Before I could say anything Allan took my hands shaking his head. "I wanted to make you stay more than anything that night. I don't know what stopped me. I need you to make me a promise."

"What promise?"

"I never want to end with anything left unsaid again. I thought I was never going to see you again. I was having horrible regrets trying to get to you. I thought if only I had held you a little longer…made you stay…."

I slid my arms around his neck holding on to Allan so tight I was surprised he didn't tell me to relax. "I'm not going anywhere without you, especially now. No more worries, no more goodbyes. Promise?"

Allan laughed, clear and relaxed for the first time in quite a while. "Promise made." He shook his head, taking the hand with the wing in his own. "I never thought there would be anyone who I could make promises to so easily before you. Just remember, I will never rush you for anything. Just wearing the ring…"

"I'm yours Allan a Dale, forever and always."

Allan turned watching as Robin waved the rest of us over to him. "Forever and always. Now that we have found our happiness, I think it's our turn to help the man who brought us together."

"I don't know how he can stand it. Not just now, but during his time in the Holy Land."

Allan gave me a sad smile. "Love knows no limits. A sea cannot stop the heart from beating, knowing your other half is still out there. The only thing that can shut down love is death. Even then…even then the love is still there. The difference is how much the hurt grows. Robin nearly lost Marian once, I know how that felt. I don't like thinking about it, but the day you poisoned yourself, I did not think you were coming back Siobhan. With today, I couldn't even comprehend the situation. Marian was betrothed and threatened so many times, but all within his line of vision. Now she's out of his sight. He has always been a better man than me on so many levels, but he is stronger as well. I do not think I could live with myself if I lost you again. I do not know how he can think straight knowing who has her."

I shook my head. "Hope, Allan. Robin has always had hope. He knows how strong Marian is. Yes she is strong willed, but she is a fighter. She knows how to survive and I think that is what keeps him going. Knowing that she can protect herself until he can find his way to her. You are both masters of chivalry, but you know that we know how the game is played. We all have our parts to play and know when too much is too much. I play the line more dangerously than Marian. She thinks ahead much farther than I do, she will be fine. That is what keeps Robin going. He knows she has though ahead enough so that he can perfect the plan to save her. They've always been able to finish each other's thoughts. It's a never ending game of chess. We are all the pawns to protect the board of England. It's a strategy and for one I am glad Robin is the brains behind it."

Allan gave me a light kiss. "You never cease to amaze me. Your words and absolute belief that things will turn out in our favor…"

"I'm allowed to believe in miracles. We're both here and alive, that gives me all the hope I need."

**A/N:**

**One more chapter then our days together are over. :(**

**Sorry I'm so late on the updating. I swear it's not on purpose. It's been hectic moving in and amazing as well. I have awesome friends and random people that just show up in my dorm. Of course I don't mind when any attractive guy random walks into my room, although it was highly amusing when he came to visit every other hour on move in day. And it's fun matching wits with someone who might be slightly more sarcastic than me. So yes, I'm slightly distracted at times. Okay so slightly is a complete understatement. So far college social scene is awesome.**

**The work on the other hand...**

**Fuck that. I came to university for the social aspect not the work.**

**I am also currently so sick I locked my door to be left alone. That's how bad. Plus I'm suppose to be studying for a midterm, but I've had this written since I think uh early-mid September and I realize what an asshole that makes me for not uploading. Once again many apologies.**

**I will try to make the next update sooner, but I don't want to rush it. I'm kinda worried about season 3. I don't know if I'm going to continue with Siobhan's story depending on how season 3 goes. I might wrap this up simply, but in a way that I have enough to leave open if I do decide to make a third story. So pretty much what I did with Aim for the Heart. We will see.**

**Anyway.**

**To my thanks:**

**Cowgirl: Hopefully there will be less crying at the ending. I've been reading some updates the BBC have mentioned so I think I can swing something that will wrap this up nicely without ruining things should I do a third story to go with season three. Yeah, college is starting so I leave a bit earlier than I normally would. Aww thanks for the wishes not to spontaneously combust, one of my english teachers used to say something like that to me. She saw me curled in a corner of our computer labs writing (my handwriting I should mention is rather small so I fit about three and a half typed pages on one sheet of loose leaf) and goes "Pace yourself. If you write any faster that paper is going to catch fire."**

**QuietOne364: Thanks as always.**

**theinstantstar15: I enjoy making emotions bounce off the walls. It makes me giggle, big time. Yes I've been trying to enjoy myself as much as possible. I hope you do the same with school, drama is always fun, though I do know how tiring it is.**

**Hayley's Happening: New Reviewer! Yay, yay, yay! Anyway, thank you so much for your review.**

**New York Hope: I am sorry this is late, I know everyone has been waiting. Things have just been a bit wonky, but I'm alive…sort of.**


	13. A Home For Goodbyes

**Disclaimer: I have no affiliation, nor do I claim any ownership over the BBC's depiction of Robin Hood.**

* * *

I slowly awoke taking a moment to remember where I was. Even after the weeks of being on the ship, it still took me some time to remember how much things had changed.

I felt the blanket fall from my shoulder and moved back under its warmth. Warmth was a nice comfort on this trip. I had heard some horror stories of ship travel, but thankfully we had a good bit of luck. The ship's captain has recognized Robin and was happy to bring us aboard. He was a wealthy trader and took great pride in his ship and its comforts. He had confided in us that his home was on the sea, not on land, which explained why the ship was lavish. We had been able to have our own rooms, though we decided to cut back on wasting space.

I felt fingertips brush against my stomach and lips press against my shoulder. "I thought you were going to try to sleep as much as we could. You heard Robin. We will most likely reach shore by nightfall."

I smiled to myself and moved back into the warmth of Allan's arms. "I did not mean to wake you. I am sorry."

Allan turned me to face him. He looked fresh from sleep, but his eyes were bright and alert. "You did not wake me. To be honest I was enjoying watching you sleep. Now, would you be so kind as to tell me what is playing on your mind that woke you up?"

"Nothing." I pressed a finger against Allan's lips as he went to argue. "I promise you, I just woke up. Nothing is wrong." I replaced the finger with my lips, pressing a reassuring kiss against his.

Although being on this ship was a serious matter, I had found joy in our time here. Allan and I had made up for lost time. It may seem silly, but that short time in the barn had felt like years. Years that had been stolen from us. The ship had given us that time back. We no longer had to hide how we felt and could relax around everyone again. We could show our love in public and love each other in private.

Being alone had been so powerful. Our first night on the ship had been pure magic. Allan had not left my side since we had arrived on the ship and once we were in our room, I knew he would never go far again.

His hands read my body like a well-known map, knowing all of my secrets. I may not have been well versed in love making, but I knew there was something special with us. I could see it in Allan's eyes whenever he looked down at me. There was more than lust. There was love and amazement. I would softly gasp his name in the darkness of our cabin and his mouth would quickly capture mine. There was a need in him with the way he held me. I was not his property he felt he needed to claim. He held me like a lifeline.

Part of me knew that was what I was. I was what brought him from falling. I had been his focus point to keep him from being corrupt for months and now I was his reminder of who he was. He was a man who could love and I was a woman who needed that love.

Allan broke out kiss looking down at me with a smile. "As glad as I will be to help Robin, I will miss this." His hand cupped my cheek. "I have never been as happy as I have been to wake up next to you."

I placed a hand against his chest. "I will miss this as well. Allan, I love you. I will never tire of saying it."

"And I will never tire of hearing it."

I smiled and shook my head, placing my cheek on his chest. I began closing my eyes feeling his fingers run through my hair. "Have you finally forgiven me for the hair?"

Allan gave a sigh. I had dyed my hair with Djaq's help. I may not blend well with my pale face, but I could cover that when I needed to. A glimpse of my hair, on the other hand, would attract some very unwelcome attention. "After the initial shock, I do like it. You look…"

"Go on."

"You look dangerous. For some reason that makes my heart beat faster. Do not misunderstand me. I love your natural hair, I do miss it. I will not, however, lie. Black hair suits you very well, love."

I smiled. "I am so glad you approve Allan."

Allan moved his hand to the middle of my back, stroking my skin slowly. "I will always approve of you Siobhan. Now please. Go to sleep."

* * *

Allan held out his has as we climbed over another wall. "Are you getting any odd feelings?"

I looked at Allan trying to figure out if he was serious. "You mean because we are in a foreign land where people are killing each other, especially people that look like us? Or do you mean because we are creeping around a strange city at night? Or perhaps because we are trying to track down Robin's love who has been kidnapped by traitors to our country?"

Allan tweaked my nose. "It is a very good thing you are beautiful, because I am not too find of that tongue of yours."

I leaned in close with a smile. "Really? I do not remember you complaining earlier."

Even in the dark I could see the heat rise up his neck before he grabbed my hand to keep moving.

* * *

We had already had one fight in the streets so far and before we safely reached Bassam's house. We had been welcomed and sat around for dinner. Robin pleaded his case to Bassam who had already been impressed with Robin's Arabic. Bassam, seemed to be partially reluctant, but it was obvious he was weary of the war. If there was a way to bring an end to it without watching more blood, he seemed to be willing to listen. We were all watching this carefully. Bassam's help was what we needed. Family of Djaq or not, he had every right to refuse us, even to turn us in.

Djaq placed her hand on top on the old man's. "Robin is a man of peace. Trust him."

Robin folded his hands, eyes pleading. "Please."

The old man took a deep breath. "His camp is to the north. I will show you." He held up a finger as Robin looked to move. "In morning."

I ripped the flat bread in my hands taking a bite. I chewed thoughtfully realizing this could be the last night of calm in this land. I still was unsure how to react to that understanding.

Djaq looked at me from across the table with a small smile. I had a feeling she was thinking the same thing I was. She and I would share a room tonight as respectful women did. We would talk then about our plans and fears. Now we would eat and have an enjoyable conversation. Well, as enjoyable as we could manage with the fate of a war on our shoulders.

* * *

We were slow in entering the camp. Much slowed us around rambling off and pointing out the tents along the way. Djaq and I had our heads hidden as we walked between the men. Allan and Will flanked us while John walked slowly behind. Regardless of being in "friendly" territory we were still weary. This was a land we did not know. We have been working on familiar land where we had the advantage for too long. It was a shock to the system to be out of our usual element.

"Carter!"

My head snapped up as I saw Robin embrace the blonde man. A little smile crept to my lips as I saw him again. I had been reunited with Allan, but I was happy to see this man again. He was a good ally and much as I may wish to deny it, he was one of the most interesting people I had met during our work in the forest.

Carter walked over to us and caught my eye with a smile. "Siobhan, quite a pleasure."

Allan took a step closer to my side, a frown on his face.

Carter held up his hands in mock surrender. "You must be Allan a Dale. You are quite the lucky man. I mean no harm, I promise. It is nice to see you reunited again. Well, partially nice."

Robin had a wide grin on his face beside Carter. Even in the midst of all this chaos he could appreciate the humour of this. Good. It has been too long since Robin looked in good humour. Even if it was at Allan's expense I would not mind.

I bowed my head to Carter, lightly squeezing Allan's hand. "The pleasure is mine, Carter. I see being back here has suited you well. Thought I thought you said you did not plan to fight."

Carter's smile grew. "I will never stop fighting. I have just switched my goal. Now I fight for peace." His attention turned back to Robin. "And the fight for peace goes well. Come, I will bring you to the king."

We followed Carter and I felt Allan staring at me. I turned my face to him with a smile. "Yes?"

His frown was still in place. "Do I get an explanation?"

I should have been upset, but I was too amused by this sudden burst of jealously. "Oh, I am sorry. Is there something that is upsetting you?"

"Siobhan."

"Allan, calm yourself. Carter and I met briefly while he was in camp. We spoke of fighting methods."

"And in those talks my name came up?"

"Actually I never gave him a name. That must have been Robin. He knew there was someone." My smile slipped as I remembered exactly when Carter had arrived.

"I do not like that look. What did you just think of?"

I held his hand a bit tighter. "He did know your name. He was there when I explained everything. About Tobias, about you saving me. I stormed off shortly after explaining myself and the rules of my cottage after that. Carter came to see me before he left to return to the Holy Land."

Allan raised an eyebrow. "Go on."

"He came to talk to me about my situation. I think he had figured out that there was more to the story and was interested. He originally came to try to figure out where I hid all my knives, but then asked about my situation. He wished me luck." And kiss me.

Allan looked at my face. "Damn it all. He kissed you."

I bit my lip with a smile. "Sometimes I still wonder if you can read my mind. It was nothing. Just a friendly goodbye."

Allan's nostrils flared. "I am just going to ignore that part and focus on him wishing you luck."

"Allan, he is a soldier. He was interested in my skills."

"Siobhan. You can stop now, you are not making this any easier."

I gave him a soft kiss, keeping my voice low. "I love you. Remember that, you stupid man."

We had stopped a ways before King Richard's tent to let Robin speak to him alone. This was when I realized something was wrong. I noticed the king's eyes look over Djaq and a look of anger fell across his face.

"Djaq."

Her eyes moved to mine. "You see it too."

"Something is very wrong."

The guard swarmed around us pointing their swords at us. Robin did not go for his weapon and we reluctantly followed suit. Robin was close with the king. There had to be some misunderstanding.

* * *

"Let the dessert decide." I pulled on the rope binding my wrists. They had found the knives on my forearms and taken them. I even noticed Carter had winced at that. He had not been pleased about what had happened. From what Much muttered along the way, I could tell he had tried to defend us before the king had him silenced.

Now we stood tied to posts in the sand.

Will looked at the king with a look of pure anger. "This is the same as execution."

"Yes, but if God allows there is always a chance."

"You Christians and your God will be the end of humanity." The anger was boiling inside me.

Djaq nudged me with her shoulders. "Siobhan, please."

They had only enough posts to tie six of us. Apparently there was a waiting period for torture. Instead of simply killing me they had tied Djaq and I back to back. Originally, I had thought it would work in our favour and we would be able to untie each other. Unfortunately, that seemed to have crossed the minds of the soldiers as well. I was tied lower on the posts so that even if I strained forward I would not be able to reach Djaq's hands.

Robin's voice was hard and held a hint of defeat as he spoke to the king. "And I will remember you as the king who was too long at war."

I sighed as I watched the king and his soldiers ride away. Carter was slow to leave. He has been the one to tie me and did not look very happy about doing so. He had given me a hard look while doing so as if I was suppose to realize something. Perhaps it was his way of saying he was sorry. Regardless of his intentions, it was not enough.

* * *

I was not sure how much time had passed when Will broke the silence. "How long?"

"In this heat? Without water?" Djaq's voice trailed off, knowing that there was no satisfactory answer.

"I'm sorry my love. I should have made you stay with Bassam."

I rolled my eyes; very glad no one could see me. I was happy for Will and Djaq, though mostly for Djaq. Will still annoyed me. Perhaps it was because of our past, or perhaps it was because his version of taking care of someone had once left me unconscious on top of a castle wall.

My eyes started to close as I realized the last images I had of the world would be of a desert. This was not how I thought things would end. A horrible end was not a huge surprise, but death in a foreign land had not been part of the plan. So much for the fantastic voyage that had Matilda had dreamt up.

My feet were in the sand and felt a weight I had ignored before. My eyes snapped open. Carter's look made sense now. I still had knives. The trick would be to get them. I did not want to tell anyone. I could not get anyone's hopes up.

* * *

My wrists were bleeding. I had always considered myself flexible, but with restrains my work was difficult. I think Djaq had passed out since she had not said a word. Most of us were saving our strength rather than speak, but Much would never stay quiet for long.

I gave a shaky breath and pulled on the ropes once more. There was a cramp in my leg and side from straining. The tips of my fingers brushed the hilt of my knife, but my leg gave out. I slowly liked my lips focusing my last strength on moving. Again.

I grabbed the hilt. "Goddess be praised."

I heard Allan's voice call to me. "Siobhan?" I heard the panic in his voice. We could not see each other, but that was not for long.

"My knife. I have it." I swallowed some air and decided it was not yet time to stand. I gripped the knife and twisted my wrist to saw at the rope.

Much gasped. "I see something. I see someone coming."

I heard hoof beats, but continued sawing harder. If nothing else I could always throw my knife at whoever was trying to stop us. It would not help us, but it would make me feel better.

They were cheering and calling out, when Allan's voice dropped. "It's the Sherriff."

Robin's voice was low, but carried to me. "Siobhan. Hide your knife. You will never get us in time. I see three horses. We need our time."

I wanted to cry. "Robin."

"Siobhan. He has Marian."

The knife dropped out of surprise more than order. I gasped. It was away from my feet and I was unsure I would reach it. That was when I heard the Sheriff.

I hung my head listening to the chaos around me. He was telling us about how he thought he was the one with the spy in our ranks, when really it was Marian all along. I heard a slap and a groan from Allan.

"Do not touch him."

"I know that voice." A moment later the Sheriff was standing before me, a twisted smile on his face. "Siobhan! Somehow I am no where near as surprised as perhaps I should be." His eyes flicked down landing on my knife. "Oh, ho. What do we have there? The king's men forgot to check you for a weapon? No wonder they are losing the war. I think I will just take this back with me." The Sheriff gave a tsking noise. "Oh, look at what has become of your wrists. I will miss your work Siobhan. Such a waste of talent."

He took my knife and tucked it in his belt turning his attention back to Robin. "Well I have a king to kill. You all have a nice day."

The horses went away and it was apparently that hope had been lost.

Robin was trying to boost moral, but it was not going well. "Siobhan?"

"Robin, I have a knife left, I can try, but it took me almost the entirety of our time here to grab the first one. Marian, it is so very nice to hear your voice again."

"Siobhan, can you try?"

"I can try. I make no promises." I sighed. "Enjoy your time together."

I could imagine Marian's face at my words. She softly cleared her throat and I knew her attention had shifted again. "Say the words then handsome."

"What words?" Robin's confusion brought a smile to my face.

"I, Robin, take you, Marian..."

"Now?"

"Now is a good time I think . We are in the company of the best witnesses England has to offer."

My eyes stung with tears as I began to reach for my knife again. The coarse rope bit into my wounds, but I kept moving forward. Their words were giving me added strength. Robin and Marian had been reunited. If that could happen, we could get out of here. I tilted my body to switch position. I would need to reach for my other ankle sheath now. My fingers touched the hilt and I steaded my leg with all I had to raise it closer to my fingers. I grabbed it with a sigh and began my attack on the ropes listening to Much cry.

Marian's voice held a smile. "Much, do not cry."

"He's not crying. He is just laughing from the wrong side of his face." My head snapped up as I saw Carter a few feet from us. I had not even heard him approaching.

My eyes widened. "Carter."

He walked to my side seeing the knife in my hand. "Is that all you have gotten done? It is a good thing I came back." He smiled and cut my bindings.

"Carter. I do not know whether I should kiss you or stab you."

He smiled and helped me to my feet. "How about you help me cut everyone down and then you can decide?"

I laughed and started to undo Djaq's ropes as Cater spoke to Robin. I ran to Allan, cutting his ropes and kissing him at the same time.

His arms enveloped me, face pressed to my hair. "I thought I was going to lose you. I could not even see you." He looked to my face and noticed the blood on my arms. "Siobhan."

The tears were still coming down my face and I pressed myself to his chest. "I will be fine, just hold me a while longer, please."

Carter walked toward us clasping Allan's shoulder. "May I?"

Allan reluctantly let me go so Carter could examine my wrists. He tore some fabric from his cloak handing one strip to Allan and taking one myself. "This is deep, but not enough to make me worry. This will do for now, but we must move. I have weapons and horses, we can go."

I smiled at the men binding my wrists. "It takes a case of absolute hopelessness, but finally someone patches me up."

Allan rolled his eyes and we moved toward Robin.

John held up his hands as we all went to move forward. "No. We all say it now. We all say 'We are Robin Hood.'"

I smiled, a new wave of courage coursing through my veins. I pulled Allan's arm around me, pressing us closer together. Our voice rose into the desert sky, "WE ARE ROBIN HOOD."

* * *

We sat crouched at the lip of the canyon watching Robin fight in place of the king. King Richard watched with disbelief in his eyes, seeing that we had been speaking the truth all along. It was a mole within his own knights that was turning against him and that peace would not stand a chance without our help.

I pointed to the valley below. "Marian, I think we need a ruling here."

Marian nodded. "He needs us."

I gave a smile. "It is about time. A girl can only wait so long to have a bit of fun."

We ran toward the horses and Allan gave me a hand up to sit with him. "Is this enough of an adventure for you now?"

"You have always brought adventure into my life. Remember my birthday?"

Allan leaned forward with a laugh. "Hold tight, love. This is something to top your birthday."

* * *

We stood in the deserted bazaar looking around. Things were much too quiet.

John headed our group as Robin, Marian, and Much had already gone ahead of us. "Something is not right. Split up and move."

Allan and I nodded to each other taking parallel routes. If anything were to happen it would not be too difficult to reach the other. I found a fallen crossbow and grabbed it continuing down the alley. The sword was nice, but the crossbow had a better range. I moved more swiftly and found Marian trying to reason with Guy.

"I am going to marry Robin Hood." She was smiling and laughed. "It is over Guy."

The pain that came over Guy's face could not be put into proper words. It was more than sadness, more than anger. It almost looked like insanity, but-

Guy ran toward Marian, his sword still clutched in his hand. He ran her through. He ran through my best friend with his sword.

I was screaming. I did not know the words or the language that emerged from my lips. All I was sure of was that I was screaming as I ran toward Marian.

Robin beat me somehow and was kneeling beside her. I crawled over to see seeing the sword still lodged in her belly. I had stopped screaming and was muttering touching her arm and her cheek. I had no idea what else I could do.

Marian's eyes were wide and focused on Robin. "The king!"

"Marian, he's all right. He will be fine."

Marian looked down at herself. "How is it looking down there. Am I beyond even the amazing talents of Djaq and Siobhan? Can we just get this out of me? It hurts."

Djaq moved backward and pulled me with her, saying nothing. We just clutched hands. We had saved her before, but she was right. There was a sword through her. Removing it or leaving it would make no difference. It was a surprise she was even still speaking to us. The sword in place was giving us the extra time with her.

Robin looked at our faces understanding that. "Not just yet."

Marian looked at Djaq and I with wide eyes. "Why? Will I…Siobhan? Djaq?"

Djaq and I looked at each other, tears still in our eyes as we let Robin and Marian have their last moments together. That was what we could do. That was the kindest thing we could do for them.

Will walked beside us and pulled Djaq into his arms watching as Robin and Marian finished their wedding vows. Allan was staring at me, hand held out to me. I walked to him. Part of me wanted to run. I wanted to run so far away. Away from the pain and the crying. I just could not. I could not abandon everyone, so I did the next best thing.

I took Allan's hands and watched and Robin kissed Marian. In that kiss I watched as Marian grabbed the sword and pulled, a cry rising up from her lips. That cry was her last breath. The last we would ever remember of Marian.

I turned to bury myself in Allan's shoulders when I saw a figure slumped in a doorway facing us. "Carter."

I ran to him, Allan close behind. Carter's face was pale and he had lost so much blood. His once white robes were crimson.

I knelt beside him, taking his face in my hands. "Carter, what happened?"

He coughed, wincing as he did so. "The Sheriff. I went to the king, but the Sheriff…" He reached out and took my hand squeezing it tightly. "I am sorry about Lady Marian."

Allan carefully knelt beside me looking at the solider that had rescued us. "I know we only met, but is there anything we can do?"

Carter gave a small smile. "There is one thing. Allan a Dale, you take care of this woman. She loves you very much. I watched as she stood up to her friends to defend you and her love for you. If you promise me that I can go in peace."

Allan's voice was tight. "I cam promise you that. It is a promise I will take to my grave."

I felt tears well up in my eyes. I had lost my best friend and now I was about to lose a man I barely knew, but had done so much for me. "Thank you Carter. Thank you." I pressed a soft kiss to him lips, feeling the warmth leave his body.

"I die a happy man for having met you Siobhan. A very happy man." Carter gave my hand a last squeeze and shut his eyes for the last time.

I looked at Allan and cried. My body was finally shutting down. There was too much for me to handle and I did the only thing I could do. I surrendered myself to his arms, hoping that things would be better when he held me.

* * *

Djaq and I held each other tightly, neither of us ready to let go just yet. It had been a few days, days needed to recover and say our final goodbyes. Djaq and Will were staying behind in the Holy Land. I understood their reasoning and it was good to have some connections here. I would miss them. I would miss a lot.

I had lost Marian and I was losing Djaq to the Holy Land. I was losing the women who knew what it was to love an outlaw.

I stood up and held out a small package. "I have a last gift for you Djaq. One last present until we meet again."

Djaq took it in her hands and carefully opened it. Inside was a veil.

Back when Robin had first returned to England he had brought me back a long piece of fabric that had the looks of silk, but was much sturdier. It was a deep emerald color with black embroidery running through it. I had once imagined it as a wedding veil and that is what it had become. It was not a traditional veil, but a long headpiece. The majority of the veil was a deep blue which made the border pop more. The colouring would be perfect for Djaq and it was my wedding gift for whenever she and Will officially joined.

There were tears in her eyes as she held the gift. She did not move, but just stared at me, fingers slowly rubbing the fabric.

Will appeared at her shoulder and saw the gift as well. He seemed confused until he saw the border. The last time he had seen it was when we still thought our future was together. He moved forward and embraced me tightly. This was goodbye. The goodbye the three of us needed. No words, just an understanding.

I pulled away and nodded to them. It was goodbye, Much and John had their chance to say their part, but I needed to leave now.

As I turned away Robin pulled me to his side as we exited Bassam's house. "I will always be proud of you Siobhan." His nostrils flare for a moment. "You say goodbye with much more grace than I ever will."

I turned to him, eyes hot with tears. "Oh good, so I fooled you too. Well let us try to get a bit farther from here before I completely lose control of myself."

Robin pulled me too him, both of us with broken hearts. We had people we loved surround us, but we were both going to leave so much behind. Robin had left behind his true love, buried in the sand of a foreign land. I left behind the love of my childhood with Will, the best friend through my life with Marian, and the strength of a soldier who encouraged me to defend my love. Memories were here and if only they could stay here and not follow.

I took a shaky breath and let go of Robin. "The king will have his caravan waiting for us. It would be best if you lead the way."

He shook his head. "I will, but there is one last thing to do before our journey home."

Allan walked toward us looking wonderful. We had all been given fresh clothing and washed thoroughly before our journey back. He was smiling when he walked toward us, but the smile fell when he saw my face. He quickened his pace. "Siobhan? What's wrong?" His hands cupped my face looking worried.

I smiled placing my hands over his. "Nothing, just saying goodbye."

Allan nodded and looked to Robin. "Not being funny, but shouldn't we be moving a bit faster?"

Robin smiled and clapped a hand on Allan's shoulder. "I never gave you a full apology Allan."

Allan's eyes widened, looking confused. "Robin?"

Robin took hold of both Allan's shoulders, making me move back to give them space. "I was so angry for everything you did that I never took the chance to thank you for what you had done. I forgave you, but I never thanked you. You kept Marian safe and did everything within your power to save her, even putting yourself in danger. You have protected Siobhan every step of the way. I am the family she has and she is part of mine. Allan, you have my every blessing to take her as your wife. Marry her. Love her. Cherish her and be her family. Start your own so that our memory can continue. You are my family and I thank you for taking care of my family when I did or could not. You are an amazing man Allan a Dale and with all of my blessings I want you to marry Siobhan."

Allan's grey blue eyes searched Robin's face for a trick or joke and found none. He embraced his reunited friend, brother, and leader.

When the embrace ended Allan turned to me and held out his arms.

I threw myself into his arms and for the hundredth time loving how he did not waver for a moment. "I love you with all of my heart."

He kissed me roughly, hands gripping me as if afraid I would fade away with the sand. His lips curled into a smile as he broke the kills. "A sea away from home and you still taste like apples."

Robin cleared his throat. "I am going to go check on the caravan, follow when you are finished saying all of your sweet nothings to each other." His smile was part sad, but I think it helped to see that he could still make others happy.

I looked at Allan feeling his heart through his shirt. "Things have been hard."

He gave a low laugh, a sound that sent pleasant chills throughout my body. "It has been more than just hard love. We were kidnapped, we dug graves, and we just said goodbye to two of our closest friends. I think we can agree it had been more than just hard."

"I have had you Allan. That has all I have ever needed."

* * *

In the dark of the night Allan and I stood on deck watching the night sky. Allan stood behind me, arms around me as we both enjoyed the ocean breeze. The others had fallen asleep after a large meal and plans on what would happen once we returned home. There would be many to seek out along the way and we were in no need to rush this time around.

Allan rested his chin on my shoulder. "You have been very quiet love. Is something on your mind."

I gave a little laugh. "You know me too well for your own good Allan."

He turned me in his arms so I was facing him. "Well, go ahead and tell me."

I bit my lip. "It is just a feeling Allan. Nothing is sure right now."

Allan raised an eyebrow with a smile. "Not being funny, but I would bet good money on your feelings. Thus far they have never been wrong."

I smiled and took on of his hands in my own. "It was just what Robin said earlier. About us all being a family and the family is growing."

Allan gave a laugh. "Thinking about our thirteen children?"

I gave a little smile and placed Allan's hand on my stomach. "I was thinking that maybe we may be saying hello to Thomas in the coming months."

Allan's eyes widened. "Thomas?"

I nodded as he leaned in to kiss me. "One more for the gang."

Allan kissed me with passion and care, his hand never moving from my stomach. Our goodbyes were left in the Holy Land. Only hellos would lie ahead.

* * *

**A/N:**

**Firstly, I am so sorry for how long this has been. College brought a new world to me and I kept thinking "Oh next week I'll get to finishing. Maybe next month." After some time I forgot I had never finished my stories. For that I am sorry.**

**A universal thank you to all my readers. I hope you've enjoyed my story a much as I enjoyed writing it. I will not be writing another installment and as of now I do not foresee a one shot flashback like "In The Rain". **

**I thank you for your time and your lovely reviews.**

**On to some personal thanks:**

**Scribbled Truth: Thank you! I still remember that when I first started, this show was not well known. Most of my readers were from the UK and even then it did not seem to be popular. I am just glad more people began to enjoy the show. I do hope you did not cry too hard!**

**Cowgirl: The romantic ones still exist, you just find them in the most unexpected places. The romantic ones are those who deny it most. The ones who you trade sarcastic banter with like a never-ending ping pong match. The ones who drive you mad, yet are still there at the end of the day. The ones that drive you mad are the ones you will always love the most. I do hope all has been well and that you have enjoyed this story.**

**theinstantstar15: Thank you! I do hope this ending was satisfying, though years late.**

**Ithilya: Here is the finale, long in the making!**

**Ohnobro: ha. Nice. ::rolls eyes::**

**hodhod2011danger: Look! It's done!**

**TheDevilsDaughter267: Thank you for everything. It was actually your review that reminded me that I still has not finished this. Thank you for the push and I hope this closes out Siobhan's tale for you.**


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